Ex-boyfriend deal...

ok what do you guys think about this? I have argued with my girl over this many times and she compromised some but not all the way. I said i dont want that BS, drop them cold and she says that they are her friends, that they dont hang out, every once in a while they talk over the phone saying "hi, hi". I asked her to delete them off of her facebook, myspace and delete all the pics and after a long debate she did it and she said that she wont call them anymore but if they call her she will answer and talk to them. I said why cant you just drop them, she says that they are friends and she cares about them as friends! well this BS put a "question mark" in my head and I started to have trust issues. she says that her reason for not dropping them is cuz what i am doing is controlling and when i mention that i do not trust her and she created this trust issue in me, she says that get over it, i dont do anything wrong.

am I being ridiculous? is she on the right here? what are your opinions here?

I wanna clear my head because I think about this a lot and it gives me head ache and i end up arguing with her and i really want all this to stop. she obviously wont stop talking to them even though she has compromised some and i am bothered to know the fact that when they call, she talks to them. how can I fix this?

thanks!

In my experiences.....ex's aren't to be friends.

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Originally Posted by Mr. Luos

In my experiences.....ex's aren't to be friends.

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she says that they dont hang out which i believe and she promises never to call them but IF they call her, she will answer and chat with them over the phone. I asked her to not even do that, get them out her life completely but refuses to do that.

am I being ridiculous? should i just let it go and relax? but I just think this way, if she really cared, wouldn't she just let them go for me?

what would you honestly do?

god this shit gives me a headache :mad:

dump her...life is too short for the drama. You'll never trust her completely and I can see why. Start calling some of your old ex's while she's in the same room and see how she reacts.

Stuff that Horse-Humpin' Bitch in the Wood chipper. :yup:

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Originally Posted by FORD RECOVERY EXPERT

Stuff that Horse-Humpin' Bitch in the Wood chipper. :yup:

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this is my serious gf, serious responds only dude!

I can totally understand where you are coming from. I am friends with most of my exes. There were some that I dated for like 5 mins and figured out I did not want to be in that kind of relationship with them, but I did want to be their friend. With that said, I can understand where she is coming from. On the other hand I know how I feel and know I can trust myself, but I cannot trust other people's motives. Whether that other person is my boyfriend or one of his exes or a girl he says is "just a friend". The male female relationship is so complicated and can reek havoc on your mind, body, and soul. Have you ever felt like this before? Do you normally have trust issues? If not and this have just became a problem with her, then you might have a point. I personally feel if she really valued you, your feelings, and the relationship she would understand this bothers you, maybe not why it bothers you, but that it does in fact bother you and just drop these people out of her life. If it is an emergency or something important they can leave a message, the two of you discuss it and decide if she should call them back. Just my thought!

Until here recently i was friends with all my exes, two of them flipped out. The girl I'm currently with shares my opinion on that.

Its human nature, the quickest way to get her to cheat on you with one of them, or whatever, is to say she cant see them. I would much rather her be open and honest with me about her ex's than to feel like she has to hide them. That's just me though. My girl feels the same, she wants to know all about them and whats going on, it lets her know that she can trust me, and that i feel that i can trust her.

You see, now she thinks you don't trust her, which is gonna snow ball into a lot of problems.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by 0rion

dump her...life is too short for the drama. You'll never trust her completely and I can see why. Start calling some of your old ex's while she's in the same room and see how she reacts.

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i agree. put her in the same boat and see how she feels.

girls dont see things rationally, you have to show them.

i had a serious gf that just didnt understand how relationships were supposed to work until i did the same fucked up shit to her. everything straightened out real quick.

(and no, youre not over reacting. you NEED to be able to trust your gf. and she NEEDS to understand that)

Musclefan21, if i was in the same situation I would be more worried about the friends than her. Lets face it, HONESTLY, how many guys "just want to be friends"?? The girl could totaly mean that she wants to be only friends...and thats fine. but it's the guys i would be worried about. B/c all it takes is one fight and they are all like "well he isnt good for you, I was WAY nicer....blah blah blah" add some beer to the mix and the girl might do something that she never ment to happen. Your GF prob is being on the up and up, you would just need to find out what kinda guys her ex's are.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Musclefan21

this is my serious gf, serious responds only dude!

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good luck with that one.....

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mr. Luos

In my experiences.....ex's aren't to be friends.

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:true:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Musclefan21

ok what do you guys think about this? I have argued with my girl over this many times and she compromised some but not all the way. I said i dont want that BS, drop them cold and she says that they are her friends, that they dont hang out, every once in a while they talk over the phone saying "hi, hi". I asked her to delete them off of her facebook, myspace and delete all the pics and after a long debate she did it and she said that she wont call them anymore but if they call her she will answer and talk to them. I said why cant you just drop them, she says that they are friends and she cares about them as friends! well this BS put a "question mark" in my head and I started to have trust issues. she says that her reason for not dropping them is cuz what i am doing is controlling and when i mention that i do not trust her and she created this trust issue in me, she says that get over it, i dont do anything wrong.

am I being ridiculous? is she on the right here? what are your opinions here?

I wanna clear my head because I think about this a lot and it gives me head ache and i end up arguing with her and i really want all this to stop. she obviously wont stop talking to them even though she has compromised some and i am bothered to know the fact that when they call, she talks to them. how can I fix this?

thanks!

---

dude if she talks to them and so be it. One thing that creates problems in relationships is insecurities. That is why you guys are arguing. If it is serious just drop the argument with her, it is not worth the arguing, let them be her friends......she is with you know. I have had gf's that still kept their ex bf's as friends and i had no problem with it. If there is ever a major issue to happen like cheating i would dump her, because i will easily find another.

I have never had any girl cheat on me. Confidence my friend, if you are doing her right and treating her good, she would have no reason to go somewhere else. My best female friend is an ex of mine, her man knows me and her have alot of history. He does not tell her to not talk to me, me and her still hang out. But guess what there is not shit going to happen between us because we are just friends. Ex's can be friends.

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Originally Posted by mrwdjv

I can totally understand where you are coming from. I am friends with most of my exes.

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lolwut, werent u just bitching about your bf doing the same thing in another thread?

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Originally Posted by 0rion

good luck with that one.....

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Oh come on some of us here are capable of a serious well thought out intelligent answer.
































I think

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Originally Posted by Musclefan21

this is my serious gf, serious responds only dude!

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:lmao: Post of the year! :rotfl:

First ? how old are you.

The way I look at this is if she is young she dosen't know any better to respect you and the the thing you have going on with her. If you are older 25ish she is playing you for what you have. And she is just keeping her options open

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Musclefan21

ok what do you guys think about this? I have argued with my girl over this many times and she compromised some but not all the way. I said i dont want that BS, drop them cold and she says that they are her friends, that they dont hang out, every once in a while they talk over the phone saying "hi, hi". I asked her to delete them off of her facebook, myspace and delete all the pics and after a long debate she did it and she said that she wont call them anymore but if they call her she will answer and talk to them. I said why cant you just drop them, she says that they are friends and she cares about them as friends! well this BS put a "question mark" in my head and I started to have trust issues. she says that her reason for not dropping them is cuz what i am doing is controlling and when i mention that i do not trust her and she created this trust issue in me, she says that get over it, i dont do anything wrong.

am I being ridiculous? is she on the right here? what are your opinions here?

I wanna clear my head because I think about this a lot and it gives me head ache and i end up arguing with her and i really want all this to stop. she obviously wont stop talking to them even though she has compromised some and i am bothered to know the fact that when they call, she talks to them. how can I fix this?

thanks!

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the last dude asked a great question!
how old are U?

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Originally Posted by SS02

the last dude asked a great question!
how old are U?

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WOW and I have 6 Mickey's in me.LOL

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Originally Posted by Sweet Chops

WOW and I have 6 Mickey's in me.LOL

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I love the Little Green bottle... cheap beer tonight for me! Broke, I am!
I am guessing he is well under 27... U hit the head on the nail, I am sure!

That is what I am thinking. I was dated my now wife for 5 years before I married her. The first 2 years I kept my options open. I am so glad I made the right choice, she FUCKING GREAT.

OH and the last cap on Mickey's said. Get this "STICK A SOCK IN IT."

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Originally Posted by SS02

I love the Little Green bottle... cheap beer tonight for me! Broke, I am!
I am guessing he is well under 27... U hit the head on the nail, I am sure!

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I'm sure you knew this before I could even buy a beer. But the Little Green Bottle is a Gernade.

Have you ever had MICKEY'S ICE? Now that shit will FUCK you up. The Moible gas station close to me has it in 40oz. BTW im not black. I just like MALT LIQUOR.

SWEET CHOPS

I haven't read the posts. uhmmmm.... lame.

Insecure much?

You've got your own trust issues to begin with and until you can deal with that, you're gonna have issues trusting anyone.

With your insecurities, your trust issues, your obnoxious need to be in control of her, you're just setting yourself up to piss her off to go back to some ex that she had that that was better than you.

It's what some people would call a self fulfilling prophesy when you start getting that way and start losing the trust. You lost trust, then you get insecure, then you get controlling, and then they start getting freaked out and they do something and the relationship is done.

There ya have it - DrMilhouse's point of view which is not necessarily "the truth", but it's one possible way to see things.

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Originally Posted by DrMilhouse

I haven't read the posts. uhmmmm.... lame.

Insecure much?

You've got your own trust issues to begin with and until you can deal with that, you're gonna have issues trusting anyone.

With your insecurities, your trust issues, your obnoxious need to be in control of her, you're just setting yourself up to piss her off to go back to some ex that she had that that was better than you.

It's what some people would call a self fulfilling prophesy when you start getting that way and start losing the trust. You lost trust, then you get insecure, then you get controlling, and then they start getting freaked out and they do something and the relationship is done.

There ya have it - DrMilhouse's point of view which is not necessarily "the truth", but it's one possible way to see things.

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This guy has the time line figured out. If thats what you you to happen. just follow the writings on the wall. Or if she is a good girl and know that. Sit her down and talk to her. There is nothing better than communication.

The ex's that I am still friends with I still hook up with every once in a while.

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Originally Posted by Musclefan21

this is my serious gf, serious responds only dude!

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I am serious.... :dunno:



JoshieDoom style up in here... :yup:

I deal with the same bs... and it's more than one ex. It didn't bother me til we broke up and she started dating the most recent one over a year ago. Of course I was out having my fun at the same time with a new one and still hear about that from her lol. But like mentioned if your insecure its going to cause problems, fighting, etc... She was over last night and guess who sends her a text! All I can say is either just deal with it and don't let it bother you or dump her and be done with it because it is just going to get to you. Women love attention, if its from an ex or whoever. I still hear from some of my ex's, but to me theres a reason they are ex's.

And at this point if she says shes not talking to any of them all of a sudden... shes lying!

I honestly have no clue what I would do. Never been in a serious relationship. But I tend to be cynical. I have that "be ready to walk away" mentality.

Without reading all previous posts in detail, I'd say you have some control issues. You are like, you are gonna do things only the way I say, or else. She has compromised. If you can too, and then prove to her over time you do actually trust her and you aren't controlling, things will be golden.

Ever seen controlling relationship outcomes? Not pretty....

Serious reply.

Did she delete my picture too!?

as Chris Rock said "A platonic friend for a woman is like a dick in a glass case. In case of emergency break open glass.'"

i have nailed most of my ex GFs at one point or another... it is just easy to do!

i would take it as a sign of disrespect and would dump her. life is too short to deal with such petty things and there are many many many many others out there to pick from. when you are young and dumb it is hard to see and that is a shame because that is when you have the most fun....

i personally think it all comes down to the type of girl..

she is a guys girl (like alot of the girls on here) where guys are JUST FRIENDS, they talk about cars, car shows, new performance mods they're doing, new cars, sports, girlfriend issues they are having blah blah blah all that crap OR

is she a girly girl that has no common interests with guys?

in my opinion if shes a girly girl that honestly has no common interests that FRIENDS would talk about maybe you have a point to be mad (and u prolly do, girls like that crave all the attention and drama its causing) BUT if shes the kinda guys girls that just loves hobbies that mostly guys are interested in....then maybe you're being a bit ridiculious.... i talk to my guy friends all the time, and they are JUST FRIENDS completely, guys ive known for years (5+) they are like brothers to me, if thats her case then trust her, if not dump her drama sucks.

Is there a reason you don't want her talking to her ex's? Maybe she ran off with one while you were together...? If not, then who gives a shit! You have to trust her or you shouldn't be together, bottom line. You have to have trust to have a non controlling, successful relationship and that trust has to be mutual. I know for damn sure the reason why my girl and I ended our 6 year relationship was because of trust issues (mostly on my part)...They ended up being correct, but it also led to us breaking up.

Choice is yours: Put your tail between your legs and say your sorry for being controlling and that you want to make up for it and really put forth an effort to trust her, OR end the relationship, because all you are doing is prolonging the inevitable.

Serious reply

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Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

i personally think it all comes down to the type of girl..

she is a guys girl (like alot of the girls on here) where guys are JUST FRIENDS, they talk about cars, car shows, new performance mods they're doing, new cars, sports, girlfriend issues they are having blah blah blah all that crap OR

is she a girly girl that has no common interests with guys?

in my opinion if shes a girly girl that honestly has no common interests that FRIENDS would talk about maybe you have a point to be mad (and u prolly do, girls like that crave all the attention and drama its causing) BUT if shes the kinda guys girls that just loves hobbies that mostly guys are interested in....then maybe you're being a bit ridiculious.... i talk to my guy friends all the time, and they are JUST FRIENDS completely, guys ive known for years (5+) they are like brothers to me, if thats her case then trust her, if not dump her drama sucks.

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+1 what she said.

I have absolutely nothing to talk about with the ex's I have hooked up with after the breakup. I actually think I got along with them better after we broke things off but I still have no desire to call most of them.

On the other hand I have plenty of girls that are just friends that are like sisters to me that I talk to ALL the time. If I started dating a girl that wasn't comfortable with me talking to them I would probably try to cut down on it a bit.

i only stayed friends with my ex-girl to try and get back with her. then i met my wife and haven't talked to my ex in years. my wife talks to a guy she dated for about 6 years every few months just to see how he's doing. she never tries to hide the fact that she talks to him and tells me when she does. i know she only does it because his life is pretty screwed up and he was a big part of her life at one time, but they are friends. plus, he lives in florida.

now, i forebode her to talk to the guy that still lives here in NC mainly because he tried to get her to come over for a booty call...after we were married! if i ever meet him, i'll knock his teeth down his throat.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by chiller2484

i only stayed friends with my ex-girl to try and get back with her. then i met my wife and haven't talked to my ex in years. my wife talks to a guy she dated for about 6 years every few months just to see how he's doing. she never tries to hide the fact that she talks to him and tells me when she does. i know she only does it because his life is pretty screwed up and he was a big part of her life at one time, but they are friends. plus, he lives in florida.

now, i forebode her to talk to the guy that still lives here in NC mainly because he tried to get her to come over for a booty call...after we were married! if i ever meet him, i'll knock his teeth down his throat.

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ahh, yes that would deserve an ass kicking!

Relax until she gives you a reason to be insecure. I feel it’s healthy to have a cordial relationship with an ex. Her talking to an ex doesn’t mean she has feeling other then friendship for them. If you’re truly serious about this girl don’t mess it up with petty jealousy. Some things to question (to yourself) and analyze why you feel you even needed to ask for an outside opinion……………..

Why did she split up with her ex?
Does her ex even what her back?
How have your past relationships ended and why? Have you been cheated on in the past?
Be sure you’re not holding this girl accountable for the mistakes of your past relationships.

Always remember: jealousy is a stinky cologne, and you should trust until you have a definitive reason not to trust…..and then move on quickly.

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Originally Posted by 0rion

dump her...life is too short for the drama. You'll never trust her completely and I can see why. Start calling some of your old ex's while she's in the same room and see how she reacts.

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Drama seems to be a part of society nowadays, it’s just what each individual deems drama. I disagree with the advice to call ex’s, game play is throwing fuel on the fire, nothing good can come of it.

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Originally Posted by Musclefan21

she says that they dont hang out which i believe and she promises never to call them but IF they call her, she will answer and chat with them over the phone. I asked her to not even do that, get them out her life completely but refuses to do that.

am I being ridiculous? should i just let it go and relax? but I just think this way, if she really cared, wouldn't she just let them go for me?

what would you honestly do?

god this shit gives me a headache :mad:

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Neither one of you should be giving up friends. Live an exclusive life and you’ll find yourself lonely in the future.

we all know the only reason to "stay" friends with an EX is that there is always a possibility of a late night hook up thats the only reason, I personally have no female friends. Its pointless I dont like putting up with there shit, why should I put up with it if im not getting any ass from them. Pretty simple to me in my eyes.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by DUBB

lolwut, werent u just bitching about your bf doing the same thing in another thread?

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Yes, however his ex was "the one who got away" that his has been in love with for years! I just didn't feel the need to go into all the history!

I never had any girls that I could just keep as friends. In the end they always ended up liking me, wanting to date me, etc... And you can see some of the comments of why guys keep talking to their ex's, I did the same thing. At least 90% of guys who have a hot chick friend want to hook up with them. It comes down to if you trust her or not.

I've been with my girl for ove a year and a half and there were probally 3 different times for 2 months at a time we broke up and did our own thing... only one time I was hooking up with her the whole time at least once a week. And tha's only because I turned her down.

So like I said before either deal with it or move on... it's not going to go away. People don't change over night.

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Originally Posted by Musclefan21

this is my serious gf, serious responds only dude!

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i think he was


but in all honesty you can't tell her who she can and can't talk to truth of the matter is if she really cares about you when the exes call she will tell them she is in a serious relationship. Your job is to make sure she has no reason to talk to anyone else...romance her to death....and that's not picking up some bar-b-que and gettin busy. gotta do the little stuff to keep her happy
and remind her that exes are exes for a reason

Quote:

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Originally Posted by 4thtimes charm

i think he was


but in all honesty you can't tell her who she can and can't talk to truth of the matter is if she really cares about you when the exes call she will tell them she is in a serious relationship. Your job is to make sure she has no reason to talk to anyone else...romance her to death....and that's not picking up some bar-b-que and gettin busy. gotta do the little stuff to keep her happy
and remind her that exes are exes for a reason

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bullshit my bitch loves BBQ... course she's 6'4, tree fity, and drive a mack truck

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ztrouble

bullshit my bitch loves BBQ... course she's 6'4, tree fity, and drive a mack truck

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that's funny:lol::lol:

post pics of gf then post poll for dumpage or not to be dumped

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mr. Luos

In my experiences.....ex's aren't to be friends.

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He is right. Every experience ive had with GFs being friends with there ex's have ended badly.

Too many girlfriend, boyfriend issues going on in here. EVERYBODY with issues break up and find someone else.......they aren't worth it. Go out and get some strange, you'll feel better, I swear!!!!!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Musclefan21

ok what do you guys think about this? I have argued with my girl over this many times and she compromised some but not all the way. I said i dont want that BS, drop them cold and she says that they are her friends, that they dont hang out, every once in a while they talk over the phone saying "hi, hi". I asked her to delete them off of her facebook, myspace and delete all the pics and after a long debate she did it and she said that she wont call them anymore but if they call her she will answer and talk to them. I said why cant you just drop them, she says that they are friends and she cares about them as friends! well this BS put a "question mark" in my head and I started to have trust issues. she says that her reason for not dropping them is cuz what i am doing is controlling and when i mention that i do not trust her and she created this trust issue in me, she says that get over it, i dont do anything wrong.

am I being ridiculous? is she on the right here? what are your opinions here?

I wanna clear my head because I think about this a lot and it gives me head ache and i end up arguing with her and i really want all this to stop. she obviously wont stop talking to them even though she has compromised some and i am bothered to know the fact that when they call, she talks to them. how can I fix this?

thanks!

---

Use your head man...you're a guy so you know exactly what these "ex's" are thinking. Soon as you fuck up they'll be ballz deep. You're not insecure or any of that garbage....who in their right mind what's their "serious g/f" talking to some dudes that have fucked her in the past? If she can't break it off then do yourself the favor and become an ex yourself.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Musclefan21

She obviously wont stop talking to them even though she has compromised some and i am bothered to know the fact that when they call, she talks to them. how can I fix this?

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Ahhh, I've never dated a woman that is online. They flirt and talk non stop to guys. They collect them like pokemon cards. If they break up with some dork online they'll have another one by the end of the day. You might get online and look at some nudies or something but you're probably not jumping at the chance to talk the entire time to some chick. I know I'm not. What do you think she's going to do? Listen to some music and find a dude. You know I'm right. Drop her like a bad habit dude. Try to find one that doesn't know a damn thing about computers. Because once they are regulars online they are turned out and talking to guys anytime you turn around. Go to the hood and get you a lady their parents can't afford the internet.

If you trust her why be upset? If you don't trust her either you have a real reason or you are simple insecure.

I have an ex girlfriend my wife and I will be visiting on vacation this summer...

^^^weird

look up oxytosin,

that should give you your answer, quit wasting your time and move on.
Nothing positive will come out of this situation.

If its really this big a deal, then a couple things are apparent

1.) You don't trust her, theres probably a reason for it

2.) She's nto worried about your relationship enough to change things.

Cut the string, recast.....plenty of fish in the sea.

-Will

dude, get rid of her. Girls talk to ex's because theres underlying issues or "unfinished business", they know they have a history together and girls like convenience, so if you two have problems shes going right back to any one of these ex's she has in her bullpen. Do you think for a minute that any of her ex's are calling her because they just wanna see how she's doing? Be honest with yourselves guys, how many of you truly have girls that are ONLY friends, if you do I can guarantee you they were never real GF's. Guyfriends are just guys that are waiting in line to fuck your girlfriend.

ps. Sleeperc5 is probably fucking her

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

i personally think it all comes down to the type of girl..

she is a guys girl (like alot of the girls on here) where guys are JUST FRIENDS, they talk about cars, car shows, new performance mods they're doing, new cars, sports, girlfriend issues they are having blah blah blah all that crap OR

is she a girly girl that has no common interests with guys?

in my opinion if shes a girly girl that honestly has no common interests that FRIENDS would talk about maybe you have a point to be mad (and u prolly do, girls like that crave all the attention and drama its causing) BUT if shes the kinda guys girls that just loves hobbies that mostly guys are interested in....then maybe you're being a bit ridiculious.... i talk to my guy friends all the time, and they are JUST FRIENDS completely, guys ive known for years (5+) they are like brothers to me, if thats her case then trust her, if not dump her drama sucks.

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I didn't read anything after this, but just thought I'd quote it cause I definitely agree with a lot of it.

I'm a guy's girl. I have a ton of guy friends. There's nothing between me and any of them really (I mean lets be honest, occasionally there's the awkward moment when somebody gets hit on and you have to make intentions clear.. but it's pretty rare.) and I love having them around. My guy friends keep me grounded. Listening to them bitch about the shit their girlfriends pull has made me who I am today. :rotfl: I know what NOT to do.

Anywho. I can't imagine giving up all my guy friends that I've known for years. Even if one or two of them is an ex. It just depends on the individual situation. I have an ex that I'm friends with that I've known for like 6 years now. We dated 3 or 4 years ago. We're just friends. And if I ever dated anybody insecure enough to tell me to cut him or any other of my guy friends completely from my life because they don't trust me, I'd be pissed. I care about him (definitely in a totally friends-only way), and he's been around to help me out more than a time or two.

You can say all you want that "it's the guy you have to worry about, even if you trust her." But that's not true. Even if her guy friend DOES have other intentions than just being friends, in the end nothing will EVER happen unless she wants it to. She probably doesn't.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by 310stanger

Girls talk to ex's because theres underlying issues or "unfinished business", they know they have a history together and girls like convenience, so if you two have problems shes going right back to any one of these ex's she has in her bullpen. Do you think for a minute that any of her ex's are calling her because they just wanna see how she's doing? Be honest with yourselves guys, how many of you truly have girls that are ONLY friends, if you do I can guarantee you they were never real GF's. Guyfriends are just guys that are waiting in line to fuck your girlfriend.

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Dude you are 100% on the money, at least with most girls my age, I can't tell you how hard it is to convince a girl that 99% of her guy friends are only her friends because they want to fuck her. You guys should all read this, it's hilarious and so much of it is true. http://www.laddertheory.com/

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Kjz99z28

You can say all you want that "it's the guy you have to worry about, even if you trust her." But that's not true. Even if her guy friend DOES have other intentions than just being friends, in the end nothing will EVER happen unless she wants it to. She probably doesn't.

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I will never understand why guys always feel the need to blame and beat up/kill the other guy that she cheated with and stay together with her, it was her decision to cheat, and it's already been displayd in this very thread!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by 310stanger

dude, get rid of her. Girls talk to ex's because theres underlying issues or "unfinished business", they know they have a history together and girls like convenience, so if you two have problems shes going right back to any one of these ex's she has in her bullpen. Do you think for a minute that any of her ex's are calling her because they just wanna see how she's doing? Be honest with yourselves guys, how many of you truly have girls that are ONLY friends, if you do I can guarantee you they were never real GF's. Guyfriends are just guys that are waiting in line to fuck your girlfriend.

ps. Sleeperc5 is probably fucking her

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There ya go. :lol:

But seriously, does she compare you to her exes? If so, then move on. I have heard that relationships die because of camparisons or "unfinished business". From working in a mall for a few years all the idiosyncratic ways were revealed from conversations I have heard.

GOD I LOVE CARS...problems can be fixed. Women...not so much.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by cammed goat

There ya go. :lol:

But seriously, does she compare you to her exes? If so, then move on. I have heard that relationships die because of camparisons or "unfinished business". From working in a mall for a few years all the idiosyncratic ways were revealed from conversations I have heard.

GOD I LOVE CARS...problems can be fixed. Women...not so much.

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I love cars too!!! treat them right and they will treat you just as good back, love em. relationships not so much. lol... no wonder we car people "fall in love" with cars. my beauty is my one true companion, and even though my window motor may be takin a crap on me...its ok ill fix it i wont start a fight over it with her :lol: i need help.... haha

Bang her sister

-Will

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mrwdjv

I can totally understand where you are coming from. I am friends with most of my exes. There were some that I dated for like 5 mins and figured out I did not want to be in that kind of relationship with them, but I did want to be their friend. With that said, I can understand where she is coming from. On the other hand I know how I feel and know I can trust myself, but I cannot trust other people's motives. Whether that other person is my boyfriend or one of his exes or a girl he says is "just a friend". The male female relationship is so complicated and can reek havoc on your mind, body, and soul. Have you ever felt like this before? Do you normally have trust issues? If not and this have just became a problem with her, then you might have a point. I personally feel if she really valued you, your feelings, and the relationship she would understand this bothers you, maybe not why it bothers you, but that it does in fact bother you and just drop these people out of her life. If it is an emergency or something important they can leave a message, the two of you discuss it and decide if she should call them back. Just my thought!

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I have to ask aren't you contradicting yourself here you were whining in another thread you started about how your boyfriend called an old ex now you think it's alright that you can be friends with your ex. Make up your mind.
Right here you are setting a double standard if you say your bf cant call his ex then why should you be allowed to.

To the op drop the bitch like it's hot you think it's drama now wait till eventually she says they are friends and next thing you know she banging them. Not worth the drama find a new piece of ass with less drama and enjoy life.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mrwdjv

Yes, however his ex was "the one who got away" that his has been in love with for years! I just didn't feel the need to go into all the history!

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but your still setting a double standard and whining about it. Whats to say you have an ex your talking to and was the one who got away but your not telling us about it.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by camaross0002

but your still setting a double standard and whining about it. Whats to say you have an ex your talking to and was the one who got away but your not telling us about it.

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She is just her seeking attention for a few reasons:
1) Midlife Crisis
2) Can't get any offline


I'm sure 86 Iroc-z can add to that if he see's this.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by camaross0002

I have to ask aren't you contradicting yourself here you were whining in another thread you started about how your boyfriend called an old ex now you think it's alright that you can be friends with your ex. Make up your mind.
Right here you are setting a double standard if you say your bf cant call his ex then why should you be allowed to.

To the op drop the bitch like it's hot you think it's drama now wait till eventually she says they are friends and next thing you know she banging them. Not worth the drama find a new piece of ass with less drama and enjoy life.

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yea thats what i was thinking about the other chic and her thread about the bf calling the ex, i thought it was a bit conflicting but i didnt wanna say anything lol... anyway
:lol: shes crying says the BF talks to the ex, the "one that got away" haha, that does suck, even though ure still setting a double standard :)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

yea thats what i was thinking about the other chic and her thread about the bf calling the ex, i thought it was a bit conflicting but i didnt wanna say anything lol... anyway
:lol: shes crying says the BF talks to the ex, the "one that got away" haha, that does suck, even though ure still setting a double standard :)

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now just wait we will see a thread of where she is going to tell us she is talking to an ex and wants to get back together with him. Some reason I see this in the near future.

But a true question is why is there a double standard on things from the aspect of both male and female. Why not just sit down or talk the shit out and come to a compromise if something of this nature cant be sought out then people need to go their own ways. Because due to the aspect of trust, insecurities and such things would never work out.

I am not friends with one ex that i slept with. But the exes that I didnt Im still cool with, dont really ever hang out, but if there was a random convo via internet or something it would be cool. A few of my exs have my current phone number, rarely talk to me.

Basically the ones I actually kinda still talk to never did me any wrong. They were mutual break ups, didnt really work.

But the guys I was serious with, i dont speak a word to them. dont care bout them I would have no problem dropping them if they tried to talk to me and my bf didnt like it.

But like others that I just liked, and nothing serious went down, then no biggie. I make it a point when Im not interested, and if the ex tries anything id shut him down so fast. And usually whatever bf i have at the time knows that im like that, and can be trusted.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

I love cars too!!! treat them right and they will treat you just as good back, love em. relationships not so much. lol... no wonder we car people "fall in love" with cars. my beauty is my one true companion, and even though my window motor may be takin a crap on me...its ok ill fix it i wont start a fight over it with her :lol: i need help.... haha

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lol thats cute

toityme too bad you live 4 hours away, you're car and my car need to get together some time =)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by 0rion

dump her...life is too short for the drama. You'll never trust her completely and I can see why. Start calling some of your old ex's while she's in the same room and see how she reacts.

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I agree, talk with some Exs in front of her.
Take it to another level and make yourself less available to the current G/F.
Mind fucking them is a beautiful thing:yup:

OK QUESTION FOR THE GUYS!


why do some of you still talk to your ex? Why do you think some guys still talk to their ex gfs even when they have girlfriends? Im sure this question was answered in the other thread but lets bridge it all together lol... :)

I don't talk to the ones that I was slightly serious with because chances are I still hate that haha. But the ones that I had a high school crush on or something I just check in to see how college is going or their families vice versa.

I think we are only entertaining ourselves at this point. Musclefan21 has not posted since page one. Most likely abandoned the tread do to all the nonsense posts some have put up.
Nice that a fellow gearhead comes to us for advice and get shit on for it.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

OK QUESTION FOR THE GUYS!


why do some of you still talk to your ex? Why do you think some guys still talk to their ex gfs even when they have girlfriends? Im sure this question was answered in the other thread but lets bridge it all together lol... :)

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I still talk to an "ex" I had in college... We were very much in love and made an emotional decision to part ways based upon our life decisions at the time.

She went overseas due to her ROTC scholarship and I stayed here due to my Dad being sick and went into the family business. She knew my family and I knew hers.

We did not speak person to person again until she retired 25 years later.

She married a great guy and I married a great wife. Neither of us have children. Her Mom and my Mom passed away within months of each other. She likes my wife and I like her husband. Our spouses both know were were very close and respect what we have, understand why we have this closeness, and they both understand that they are number one. After 25 (now 30 years), this lady is like a sister to me. Sure we still have some mutual attraction but we both married our spouses because we love them and neither of us would do anything to disrespect our spouses.

I cannot put a name on what it is we have, but it has endured many years, ups and downs, and will always be there.

Our spouses have nothing to fear.

Now if you want me to talk about my ex-wife... We do not talk, we do not see each other, and I could care less if she fell off the side of the earth...

thats just what i cant understand..

an ex gf shit on ya, and still guys talk to them... thats what i dont get!
if a guy did me the way i know some girls have done guys, i wouldnt talk to them at all.

I am still friends with a few guys I have dated. I don't think an Ex is always a bad thing. Sometimes two people just don't make good in a relationship, but can be great as friends. Just look at Spaz and I. We still talk, he has met my BF I brought him with me to Spazapalooza. There is no harm in maintaining a friendship. As long as you trust your girl her exs shouldn't bother you.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by transamprincess98

I am still friends with a few guys I have dated. I don't think an Ex is always a bad thing. Sometimes two people just don't make good in a relationship, but can be great as friends. Just look at Spaz and I. We still talk, he has met my BF I brought him with me to Spazapalooza. There is no harm in maintaining a friendship. As long as you trust your girl her exs shouldn't bother you.

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That is pretty much the bottom line. I have had similar situations and the friendships have lasted well over 20 years...

Listen like you never listened before. Your happiness depends on it.

Everyone who mentioned trust is absolutely right. If you trust your girlfriend this should not be an issue. Speaking from experience it is very damaging to the relationship when you tell the other person who they can and can't talk to. They begin to feel trapped by you. Next thing you know she will start resenting you for being so insecure and the relationship will begin to fall apart. You have to understand that if she loves you and you treat her right...as someone else mentioned pages before... she won't have a reason to leave you. If you've done everything right and she still leaves you, then you know she was no good for you and you deserve better.

If you're thinking marriage you don't want to be with anyone whom you can't trust with other guys/girls even if you're not around for a month. The legal issues and financial/emotional cost of a divorce is just too much to risk with someone you don't fully trust, especially if you end up having kids together.

I'm with someone right now who completely trusts me and I trust him. I let him go have fun with his female friends and he's completely O.K. with me talking to my male friends. Even if I knew that one or two of them happen to have a crush on him it doesn't matter. They're just talking and I know he won't risk our relationship for a fling. If he does it's his loss, and if I do, it's my loss. We both know we love each other. I would be completely insane to give him up, and never in a million years would I hurt him by going behind his back with some guy friend even in a moment of weakness. We've introduced our friends to each other which makes us more comfortable, and usually we don't do too much hanging out with them unless we're all together. Still it's OK for us to do so if we choose. Phone calls and messaging is still completely normal, and there's nothing wrong with a simple "Hi, how are you?"

As soon as you try to control people they will start running away from you. You have to give them a reasonable amount of freedom. We're not talking sexual freedom with whomever they want, we're talking conversation, cup of coffee, lunch, the three of you hanging out in a yard having a beer. If your girlfriend loves you and you treat her right she won't have temptations or reasons to go to someone else for that boyfriend-type affection.

Keep these things in mind. Believe me I've been through it and I know what I'm talking about. It's always hard for people to listen to others' advice. Sometimes people just have to make their own mistakes to learn, but I hope you spare yourself the pain and just go with the good advice. :)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

OK QUESTION FOR THE GUYS!


why do some of you still talk to your ex? Why do you think some guys still talk to their ex gfs even when they have girlfriends? Im sure this question was answered in the other thread but lets bridge it all together lol... :)

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Because the ex was probably a hot piece of ass and the guy still wants the chance to hit it. no other reason. If the guy has a current girlfriend, he has no reason to wanna talk to an ex other then because he is, is trying, or wants to fuck her.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by 310stanger

Because the ex was probably a hot piece of ass and the guy still wants the chance to hit it. no other reason. If the guy has a current girlfriend, he has no reason to wanna talk to an ex other then because he is, is trying, or wants to fuck her.

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Is that why Spaz still talks to me :think:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by transamprincess98

Is that why Spaz still talks to me :think:

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you are one hot peice of ass :love:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

you are one hot peice of ass :love:

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:haha:

Don't listen to Stanger he is cynical :lol:

well I broke it off today. I cant deal with a girl who will continue to talk to her exs knowingly that it will destroy her "SERIOUS AND POTENTIAL VERY LONG TERM" relationship. I was gonna pop the question in about 6 months to a year as well. I guess she did not care about me enough.

thanks for the inputs. We are now done and I am now single!

Now fly your ass down to Orlando and I'll find you a new temporary fix

Personally I think you lost out on a female that was honest and upfront with you. You've made yourself sound immature, insecure and irrational in this thread. If you don't trust someone that is honest and not going to let you control her sounds like you are in for a lot more trouble in your future relationships.

being insecure is a major down fall for guys, i am not, have no reason to be.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by transamprincess98

Personally I think you lost out on a female that was honest and upfront with you. You've made yourself sound immature, insecure and irrational in this thread. If you don't trust someone that is honest and not going to let you control her sounds like you are in for a lot more trouble in your future relationships.

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insecurity has nothing to do with this. these guys dont even live anywhere close to where we live. me and her were gonna move in together in 2 weeks but i cancelled the hold. it is her not respecting me. doing nothing for something that bothered me. oh by the way, it bothers her when i used to talk to my ex and i stopped it.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

thats just what i cant understand..

an ex gf shit on ya, and still guys talk to them... thats what i dont get!
if a guy did me the way i know some girls have done guys, i wouldnt talk to them at all.

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It goes both ways... my gf still talks to her ex that cheated on her for the last 6 months they were together. Then she gets back with him, is over in my bed 2-3 times a week and he's doing the same haha. But she was upset because of what he was doing, not that she did the same. And yeah it's all messed up believe me...

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Musclefan21

insecurity has nothing to do with this. these guys dont even live anywhere close to where we live. me and her were gonna move in together in 2 weeks but i cancelled the hold. it is her not respecting me. doing nothing for something that bothered me. oh by the way, it bothers her when i used to talk to my ex and i stopped it.

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Sounds like my situation... only thing is she actually went back to the guy. Honestly I think you made the right choice. It's easy for me to say it, but I know what I got myself in to. And it's funny how you will do things for them, but god forbid you ask for the same.

The reality is that a man can be “just friends” with women, even if they happen to be an ex.

There are a few of my ex’s that I consider friends. When one has a mature relationship with someone that has reached a certain level of intimacy why is it so absurd to want to stay in touch with that person? If a girl I’m seeing is talking to an ex on the phone or even out for drinks to catch up, I generally do not have a problem with that. What do I have to be worried about (rhetorical question: when you roll like I roll there is nothing to be worried about, lol)

Don’t get me wrong, there are a few girls that I “dated” that I stay in touch with on the occasion that I happen to have a free night and am looking for female company. :laid:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Musclefan21

insecurity has nothing to do with this. these guys dont even live anywhere close to where we live. me and her were gonna move in together in 2 weeks but i cancelled the hold. it is her not respecting me. doing nothing for something that bothered me. oh by the way, it bothers her when i used to talk to my ex and i stopped it.

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it is probably the best thing for both of you.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

OK QUESTION FOR THE GUYS!


why do some of you still talk to your ex? Why do you think some guys still talk to their ex gfs even when they have girlfriends? Im sure this question was answered in the other thread but lets bridge it all together lol... :)

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I dont talk to Exs unless im setting up or doing a botty call with them.

booty call wins

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

booty call wins

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yup

This thread made me rethink everything with my gf and the bs that goes with it... shes been acting weird and saw her ex texted her and she acts all innocent. So today she told me shes just not sure it's going to work... so told her hit the road. I gave my advice and decided to take it too. I met another girl a month ago and she keeps messaging me to meet up with her, so good timing!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

booty call wins

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:date:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by tnthub

I still talk to an "ex" I had in college... We were very much in love and made an emotional decision to part ways based upon our life decisions at the time.

She went overseas due to her ROTC scholarship and I stayed here due to my Dad being sick and went into the family business. She knew my family and I knew hers.

We did not speak person to person again until she retired 25 years later.

She married a great guy and I married a great wife. Neither of us have children. Her Mom and my Mom passed away within months of each other. She likes my wife and I like her husband. Our spouses both know were were very close and respect what we have, understand why we have this closeness, and they both understand that they are number one. After 25 (now 30 years), this lady is like a sister to me. Sure we still have some mutual attraction but we both married our spouses because we love them and neither of us would do anything to disrespect our spouses.

I cannot put a name on what it is we have, but it has endured many years, ups and downs, and will always be there.

Our spouses have nothing to fear.

Now if you want me to talk about my ex-wife... We do not talk, we do not see each other, and I could care less if she fell off the side of the earth...

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Well said, especially that last paragraph LOL!

Fuck the pain away
It helps

Ladder Theory, anyone???