my best friends ex woman took her life last night.

**1fastcamarosss11** · 05-02-2006, 11:23 PM

my really good friend of 13 years, his ex woman that he has a kid with (girl 13) took her life last night she was alway a little crazy she had some problems, but i don't think anyone would think she would go to this extent. i knew her as long as him we all went out sometimes here and there. they really never had a solid relationship, they both cheated but didn't seem to care. kind of fucked up to me. but we always seem to get along overall.
ok now the bad part: she took about 20 sleeping pills and took a blanket and a pillow into the back seat of her car , started it up closed the garage, and let the car run while she slept. this my sound weird but i don't know how i feel, i do feel sad but i think i feel more for the daughter that just lost her mother then anything else. i think i may feel different when i actually she here on thurs. the last time i saw here was in late october right after i got my ss, i was in my car at the gas station then her and her sister stopped i said hi then asked if it was mine i said yep just got it, they loved it. but haven't seen her since. so i made some calls to people we used to work with and they are all coming about 4-7 of them (not bad) but here's my question? does/ did anyone else feel like this like they really don't know how they feel? i am not very good with death. maybe it's just the shock factor. sorry for the long post as you can tell. my mind is all over. thanks for any advice ahead of time. please try not to bash this thread this was hard to do. thanks jeremy

BIGRED Z · 05-02-2006, 11:25 PM

Damn, pills and car started in garage...she wasn't messing around. That's a shame. I feel for the kid.

Sorry this happened.

Lori

**1fastcamarosss11** · 05-02-2006, 11:28 PM

it's hard she had problems like checked into mental hospital for 6 month to get her head straight about 3 years ago, she seemed fine after that .

it's just going to be hard thurs because all the people i will see had a good impact on my life growing up too. i worked with most of them from 16-22. so it will be like a reunion kinda. but sad.

BIGRED Z · 05-02-2006, 11:29 PM

Strange though, she was intent on killing herself, but still took a pillow and a blanket with her for her comfort until she fell asleep.

I know most will blast a person who commits suicide as selfish, but the psychology behind it is that the person who does it truely believes their loved ones will be better off with them dead. Still, it sucks.

Lori

**1fastcamarosss11** · 05-02-2006, 11:30 PM

yeah i just hope people don't get to crazy on this because this was hard to write, and to really open up on here. i usually mess around a bit and talk cars.

BIGRED Z · 05-02-2006, 11:33 PM

Yeah, everyone has their own opinion, but it can be expressed without making you feel worse than you already do.

BIGRED Z · 05-02-2006, 11:34 PM

What does your friend make of all this?

**1fastcamarosss11** · 05-02-2006, 11:39 PM

Originally Posted by BIGRED Z

What does your friend make of all this?

he called to tell me while i was at work tonight, i didn't get much really from him but these details. i will find out more tomm or thurs. night. but i guess she said for years she was going to do it. and she did. please don't say people were there for her because i know they were her sister helped with the kids all the time ct. beause they don't have any. so he think she was just done. he went to lunch with her sat afternoon. he said she seemed fine.

the part that makes this the most messed up is that her older sisters man shoot and killed himself in front of his girlfriend about 8 years ago. russian rulet. so she saw the effects.

BIGRED Z · 05-02-2006, 11:44 PM

Jesus.

**SeVeReDiStOrTiOn** · 05-02-2006, 11:48 PM

I feel bad for her kid...and anyone else that loved her

**Liquifire** · 05-03-2006, 12:56 AM

obviously, what she didn't realize is that she hurt the ones she left behind the most. I feel for you dude.............but everyone has different feelings and reacts differently to death, so don't try to compare what you feel to how you "should feel" .....However you feel is ok, and you shouldn't try to compare or justify it. I hope her daughter is OK, being 13 I would think that at that age is about as bad as it would get considering what she probably is dealing with along with this situation in everyday life..........Good luck to all

**norm43a** · 05-03-2006, 03:53 AM

Suicide is so sad. We, my wife and family, lost our youngest son in 1997 to suicide, he was 18. From all outward appearances, Brandon was upset over breaking up with his HS sweetheart. I wish we had been able to have one more conversation about women, relationships, and moving on. However, with Brandon, he never let on, not to us, his friends, or anyone other than Tara.

I lost my sister to suicide on Easter Sunday 2000. She left an 8 year old daughter and 5 year old son. My sister was a heroin addict. I never thought she would end up on the end of a rope, but probably lying in a ditch somewhere.

I think the hardest thing for anyone is letting go of the feeling that they need to understand the why of the situation. In the two instances that this has touched my life I finally came to the conclusion that people sometimes rationalize what appears to most of us as an irrational decision. In their minds the choice is clear. I believe suicide is one of the hardest deaths to accept for that reason alone. People as a whole tend to need reasons for things to happen. With suicide, reason is out the window.

Just my perspective.

**tnthub** · 05-03-2006, 05:06 AM

In 1998 my Uncle went to his son's apartment and found him stone cold after overdosing. My cousin and I were pretty close and grew up together. He left behind a six year old boy.

Suicide is something you get through rather than get over. If there is any life insurance involved you want to hope they perceive her death as passing out rather than suicide.

**third_shift|studios** · 05-03-2006, 05:10 AM

holy fuck jeremy! that's terrible!!! yeah, i'm there with you on the whole "don't know how to feel about death" my brother is like that too. We figure if you do anything, put on a sorrowful front, be comforting and realize that their family is in crisis right now, that it's not all down to you to save the day as they need to make peace with themselves and this reality.

my sentiments to the family.

**1fastcamarosss11** · 05-03-2006, 06:02 AM

it was a ruff night to sleep, kept thinking about it, only like 5 hours max on and off.

**1fastcamarosss11** · 05-03-2006, 07:06 AM

thanks guys.

**NICKLE57** · 05-03-2006, 07:56 AM

It is very sad that someone would become so depressed that they would take their own life. I guess the only good side is that at least she didn't do like some other people in the news and kill the kids first. It seems like there have been a lot of stories about Mothers and Fathers killing their children and then taking their lives. I really feel for the little girl.

**KyleLs1** · 05-03-2006, 08:08 AM

that is so sad.. seems to be happening quite a bit lately
http://www.ls1tech.com/forums/showthread.php?t=499099

**Bigrus** · 05-03-2006, 09:05 AM

lucky she did not try and take the daughter out with her. Seems to be a trend now of days to try and kill yourself and yours kids then everyone says "post-partum"

**toneloc60** · 05-03-2006, 09:48 AM

Suicide is the most horrible death to leave your loved ones to deal with. Not only does it leave everyone wondering where they failed and how they could have prevented it, but it now makes it seem just a little bit more acceptable to others that suffer from the same tendencies.

Not knowing how you feel, or even how to feel is normal too. Personally there is nothing more annoying to me than seeing those people at a wake or at a funeral who seem just dandy until they get near the body or casket and then just all of a sudden are overly sad and somber. My older sister does that. I seriously think she forces the tears at funerals because she wants to present an appearance.

So, just be yourself. If a tear comes to your eye, it's okay to let it fall. If not, it's okay to just stand there respectfully quiet. As long as it's not during the service, it's even okay to laugh and joke a little.

I just hope that 13 year old has a lot of people keeping an eye on her. Damn, that's an impressional age to have your mom off herself. Like I said before, it may not be now or in the near future, but at some point that kid is going to be having some tough times and think it's okay to kill herself. Hey, mom did it. And sadly, that and and depression is how some families have a lot of history with suicide.