I have had a very shitty week!

**blackSS01** · 01-31-2009, 06:04 PM

Just as the thread title says, Thursday night I had to leave early from work because the GF (prego) says she isn't feeling good and was bleeding. So I come home and comfort her for the night while talking to a doctor over the phone. Friday morning we go in to the doctor for blood work. 3 hrs later they tell us that she needs a emergency ultrasound (never even got a dating ultrasound when she found out she was pregnant) So we head back to the doctors and get a ultrasound. About a hour after the ultrasound, we were informed by the doctor that she had misscarriaged. They figured the baby/fetus died around week 7 and she would have been 10 weeks along. I am not a happy camper

**GTP231** · 01-31-2009, 06:05 PM

My condolences

**blackSS01** · 01-31-2009, 06:13 PM

Thanks. I am pretty mad/sad at the whole ordeal. Depression here I come. Both of us are kinda lost emotionally

**FORD RECOVERY EXPERT** · 01-31-2009, 06:15 PM

im so sorry... ya'll are in my prayers.

**joestacey06** · 01-31-2009, 06:15 PM

Sorry man. I know how you feel right now. I went through it about 10 years ago. My thoughts are with you and your better half. Please tell her people are thinking of you two.

**blackSS01** · 01-31-2009, 06:19 PM

Thanks for the nice words.

**TempleU_WS6** · 01-31-2009, 06:20 PM

Im really sorry to hear that man. My condolences to you and your girlfriend. We'll keep you in our thoughts and you need to stay strong and comfort her.

**markarvidson** · 01-31-2009, 06:30 PM

Im very sorry to hear this.You will both be in my prayers.Stay stong buddy and do the best you can to be there for her.

**ss~zoso~ss** · 01-31-2009, 06:37 PM

not tryin to be a dick, but there's always somebody who has it worse than you, be grateful for everything you have and your relationship with each other, and try to press on, I know its easier said than done

terribly sorry for your loss

**KahanaReef** · 01-31-2009, 07:01 PM

I am so very sorry to hear of your loss

I'll keep you both in my prayers.

**310stanger** · 01-31-2009, 07:07 PM

well if theres one bright side of looking at it. you have the chance of improving whatever parts of your life you might wanna improve etc. in addition to that, you can always just give it another go at getting her pregnant. best of luck to you

**blackSS01** · 01-31-2009, 07:14 PM

Originally Posted by 310stanger

well if theres one bright side of looking at it. you have the chance of improving whatever parts of your life you might wanna improve etc. in addition to that, you can always just give it another go at getting her pregnant. best of luck to you

I have said the same thing over and over in my head to try to help. Going to be debt free here in about 3 months, and get my car done. Then shoot for a house after marriage. Only positive thing I can think of and just keep saying it to myself so I don't get all depressed and to stay strong for her

**RENE95Z** · 01-31-2009, 07:21 PM

Been there, done that 3 times. However, I also now have 3 kids to show for my efforts. My wife and I had 2 miscarriages before we had our daughter. A miscarriage in between her and my first son. No plans for anymore kids after that, but God had other plans for us and blessed us with one more son. Turns out, the last one is the "I hope you have one just like you" child. I know it's hard, but it is not the end of the world and you have to convince yourself that there was something wrong with the fetus for this to happen, which is generally the case. Remember this time and truly revel the moment when you get pregnant again and go to term and have that child to be thankful for. Good luck and sorry to hear about your loss.

**blackSS01** · 01-31-2009, 07:42 PM

I appreciate everyones kind words, makes me feel better. Not the end of the world, but horrible nontheless. She's doing good, which is a great thing, and could have been alot worse, that is for sure. I think my mom is taking it harder then anyone since she has had two kids die, one still birth and one by suicide. She's in her 60's and wants grand children. We have a good support chain, which definitly helps a lot. On talks about another attempt, we have to wait at least 3 months, doctors orders. We are in agreement, that 09 will probably not happen, maybe next year.

**cammed goat** · 01-31-2009, 08:22 PM

Be strong man. I know you must have been walking the clouds when you found out you were going to be a daddy. There will be other chances to be a daddy. Don't fret.

**Anthracis** · 01-31-2009, 08:27 PM

Deepest regrets bro. Keep your chin up.

**zero_proto** · 02-01-2009, 06:36 AM

Sometimes things happen man, i understand how you feel right now. It is hard to understand why they happen but you are healthy and so is your lady. Keep your head up man, in due time you will be blessed with a child.

**cammed goat** · 02-01-2009, 07:39 AM

Originally Posted by zero_proto

Sometimes things happen man, i understand how you feel right now. It is hard to understand why they happen but you are healthy and so is your lady. Keep your head up man, in due time you will be blessed with a child.

**Spikito** · 02-01-2009, 08:17 AM

Same thing happened to me 3 months ago. Heres some words of advice:

BE WITH HER, you won't even be close to the emotional wreck she will be for the next month. you will be emotional, she will be emotional and hormonal. The best thing you can do is just be with her.

When the baby self aborts, its a very sad and scary experience, I wasn't there, she didnt call me when it happened, but if you happen to be there, be ready, theres a lot of blood and a lot of pain.

The thing that helped us cope the most was naming her. We didnt have a sex yet, but she just knew it was a girl, so I picked out a name, seems weird but having a name for it, is a lot better than referring to it as "it".

Remind her that she is not a bad mother, there were about 10 different environmental factors that contributed to ours, mostly things that happened before she knew, stuff that was out of our control

**Mr. Luos** · 02-01-2009, 08:30 AM

This happens SO often. Doesn't make it any easier though.
Julie had one about a year before we had Sara. Something wasn't right with the pregnancy....

Best of luck!!