Relationship Advice...

**allbaugh_04** · 08-27-2011, 07:18 AM

I think you may have feelings for her then

**35th-ANV-SS** · 08-27-2011, 07:29 AM

I made up my mind...again.

I'm not bringing any emotions into this. I'm going to be upbeat, make her laugh and smile and SHOW her she can have a great time with me again.

If after this she doesn't give me another chance to be in her life...I'm giving her the goodbye letter.

If she cancels, I'm giving her the letter.

Wish me luck everyone.

**024mula** · 08-27-2011, 08:04 AM

Why even give her a "goodbye letter"?

Women are like baking bread, "you have to wait awhile before it you get a rise out of it".

Meaning: Let her make the first move.

**35th-ANV-SS** · 08-27-2011, 08:11 AM

Just gonna go with the flow. Getting ready now. Less than 2 hrs away.

I have a game plan. Lunch is not one of them. I'm going to suggest the zoo or the beach. Hope she goes for it!!!!

**TLS_Addict** · 08-27-2011, 03:01 PM

See how it goes.

I would give a better or a longer respones but half drunk.

**allbaugh_04** · 08-27-2011, 03:35 PM

Well...

**TLS_Addict** · 08-27-2011, 03:37 PM

Well what? I was at the course for 8 hours. Expect me not to tip back a few? lol

OH! You mean 35th.....I hope he goes balls deep.

**35th-ANV-SS** · 08-27-2011, 11:25 PM

We had lunch...

Talked for 5.5 hours...

My plan of keeping it non-emotional went out the door. I spilled my heart out. Ended up giving her the letter. At the end of the meet she hugged me about 4 times and for a long time.

I think that she'll probably never contact me again though

I'm not really OK with that, but I guess we only have one life and sometimes that's the chance we end up having to take.

She was very calm, super nice, she laughed a lot, and listened to everything I had to say. The whole meet wasn't emotional, but a lot of it was. She told me that she only contacted me because she truly cared for me as a person and thought that enough time had passed that we could try to be friends. She didn't know I still felt the way I did for her.

She mentioned afterwards that she fully respected my decision to go our separate ways. She knows in her heart right now that she isn't in a position to date me, or anyone else for that matter.

There were no ill feelings between us. She said she agreed that right now she wouldn't contact me because she knows I want more and she knows she has to clear her head first from this break-up before she could ever have anything more.

So all-in-all, I don't really have any regrets. I said what I could and tried as hard as I could. I gave it my all. Maybe I'll never see her again.

BTW - she looked amazing. Probably more beautiful than I ever remembered her.

**importhater81** · 08-28-2011, 01:48 AM

Time to move on and forget about her. It sounds like you've wasted enough time waiting for her to come around.

**suede** · 08-28-2011, 05:04 AM

To the tittay bar!!!! Woot woot

**FasstChevys** · 08-28-2011, 06:22 AM

She'll be back. I just have a gut feeling on this one.

**Mr. Luos** · 08-28-2011, 06:56 AM

Originally Posted by FasstChevys

She'll be back. I just have a gut feeling on this one.

And here is to hoping Jon doesn't allow her to pull that shit on him....

**35th-ANV-SS** · 08-28-2011, 07:46 AM

Originally Posted by Mr. Luos

And here is to hoping Jon doesn't allow her to pull that shit on him....

I told her...if you ever come back, only do so when you know you're all-in or nothing. She told me she was all-in when she started to date me. She had no reservations about me and thought I was an amazing man.

I take full credit for this one going sour Curtis. I made a lot of mistakes. I didn't put her first in my life because I was still into another female. She finally got tired of it and walked out.

She never played games with me though. She was always honest and up front about her feelings. Always. As much animosity as I have sometimes had with women, I can't fault this one for leaving me. I was mean to her. She's one of the kindest (if not the kindest) person I've ever met. Even when things were bad between us (again, because of me), she never once said anything hurtful to me. Not once. That's just not something you find in a person these days.

I'm devoting this time to me now. I'm going to get motivated and pick up my workout routine.

**FasstChevys** · 08-28-2011, 08:10 AM

Originally Posted by 35th-ANV-SS

I told her...if you ever come back, only do so when you know you're all-in or nothing. She told me she was all-in when she started to date me. She had no reservations about me and thought I was an amazing man.

I take full credit for this one going sour Curtis. I made a lot of mistakes. I didn't put her first in my life because I was still into another female. She finally got tired of it and walked out.

She never played games with me though. She was always honest and up front about her feelings. Always. As much animosity as I have sometimes had with women, I can't fault this one for leaving me. I was mean to her. She's one of the kindest (if not the kindest) person I've ever met. Even when things were bad between us (again, because of me), she never once said anything hurtful to me. Not once. That's just not something you find in a person these days.

I'm devoting this time to me now. I'm going to get motivated and pick up my workout routine.

Agreed - I don't think this girl has "pulled anything" on anyone.

I'll be a little surprised if she doesn't contact you in the next few weeks.

**35th-ANV-SS** · 08-28-2011, 08:16 AM

JP - I guess her and my mom were texting last night. My mom sent her a text I guess bc she knew I was up there.

She had some really nice things to say to my mother about me, my mom, and my entire family. How much she missed them and how she had them all close to her heart and hope that she always has that bond.

I guess time will tell. I've learned so much about myself and the person I wanted to become because of this female. She really is one-of-a-kind. For that, I'm thankful.

**FasstChevys** · 08-28-2011, 08:21 AM

Originally Posted by 35th-ANV-SS

JP - I guess her and my mom were texting last night. My mom sent her a text I guess bc she knew I was up there.

She had some really nice things to say to my mother about me, my mom, and my entire family. How much she missed them and how she had them all close to her heart and hope that she always has that bond.

I guess time will tell. I've learned so much about myself and the person I wanted to become because of this female. She really is one-of-a-kind. For that, I'm thankful.

Wow - I just don't see why you two won't end up together. And, the whole, "hope that she always has that bond". Dude, doesn't that say that she'll be back? That, or she hasn't read your "goodbye" letter yet.

It'll be sad if round two doesn't happen.

**35th-ANV-SS** · 08-28-2011, 08:33 AM

The exact message was "Awwww, thank you so much for your text message. Your son is such an amazing person and became that way because of you guys. You were such a wonderful mother figure to me that opened your home and your heart to me and truly meant more to me than I can ever describe. You gave me a comfort I longed for for being out here with no family. Your family means so much to me and I hold each and every one of you close to my heart. I am blessed to know you all and I hope we are able to always have that bond"

**FasstChevys** · 08-28-2011, 08:36 AM

Originally Posted by 35th-ANV-SS

The exact message was "Awwww, thank you so much for your text message. Your son is such an amazing person and became that way because of you guys. You were such a wonderful mother figure to me that opened your home and your heart to me and truly meant more to me than I can ever describe. You gave me a comfort I longed for for being out here with no family. Your family means so much to me and I hold each and every one of you close to my heart. I am blessed to know you all and I hope we are able to always have that bond"

Hmmm - I'm not sure if that was her way of saying 'goodbye', or not.

**35th-ANV-SS** · 08-28-2011, 08:44 AM

Another..."I will always want and need you in my life...That will never change. My life is better for having met and been a part of your family".

I'm sure there were more...but those are the ones my mom fwd to me.

I don't know either...

**lawless** · 08-28-2011, 01:38 PM

Hmm, this isn't a reoccurring pattern is it? The being stuck on an an ex when with a new partner, and then not noticing what you had until they are gone? (Just a question, hopefully that didn't come off as offensive.) Or was it just that one time, you happened to meet her too soon after a break up?

Either way, even if you two don't end up together, you at least said your part, and aren't still filled with all the questions you were before that would drive any sane person nuts. But I think it's good you told her how you really feel, at least now she knows and if she ever is comfortable with going for a second try, she can.

I personally would spend time away from dating to recoup, so you wont be in this position again (the whole treating her poorly because you weren't ready to be with someone new yet). But I know how it feels to meet someone that you feel was... as close to perfect for you and things just didn't work out... and then being faced with the reality that you have to move on.