Girlfriend mad

[86 IROC-Z]

Sorry this is so long, I'm doing everything I can at this point to avoid studying.

So like 90% percent of university students who's spring break was last week, I spent seven days at Panama City beach with 5 other friends for the duration of the time off school. Yes I know, it's a trashy, redneck, slime ball sort of a place, but being intoxicated most of the time, you're glad that: the weather is great, the females are attractive and scantily clad, and... uh, I guess that's about it. Surprisingly the resort we stayed at was very nice for the price (Yes ocean front)(Yes binoculars frequently used).

Anyway. My girlfriend and her other friends were staying at a place about 30 minutes or so away. Yeah, yeah, I know I'm only experiencing 10% of it, being not-single and not-21. One of her friends (Girl-A) has some infatuation with one of my friends (Dude-A), who has no other interest in her after their initial hook up the week earlier (Unknown to the girls, amusing to us). So she (Girl A) drags my girlfriend and another friend of theirs coming along down to Florida a night before they're allowed to check into their condo, so they can stay with us, so Girl-A can have a chance at Dude-A.

They're here, there's lots of alcohol to be had, half the guys went out somewhere, so its me and two of my friends (Dude-A and Dude-B) and my girlfriend and Girl-A & B. We end up playing this drinking game, which has been called many different things. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kings_(drinking_game) is the description, I've heard it called circle of death, waterfall, and other random shit.

So we've played a couple rounds already so we're pretty buzzed, and there have been three "rules" created, and a 4th rule card comes up. Drawn by Girl A, she makes up this rule: "If you break any of the previous rules, you must take off an article of clothing", because she thinks it would be hilarious to see all the guys naked. Next couple of rounds go past. Turns out Girl-A is the only person stupid enough to keep breaking the rules (her and her friends cited intoxication as the cause, I knew better), and was soon down to only a thong. Here comes the beginning of the madness that my girlfriend experiences.

I loudly announce my distaste for Girl-A using her arm to cover her tits. My girlfriend seems appalled at this. I don't know why, perhaps she forgot I had a dick. Anyway, next rule card comes up. My girlfriend. Great. Not drunk enough to get out of Mother-Hen mode, she creates a rule that allows any player to take a swig from a bottle of Jose Cuervo as a replacement penalty to taking off clothes if one breaks a rule. She cited her reasoning as "Girl-A can't perform the other rule requirements as well because one arm is taken by holding her boobs." I instantly rebuked it with the fact that her arm being glued to her chest was not a requirement for anything, but she ignored it and stuck with this inane rule. At this point I'm pissed, and start drinking more heavily from the non-game alcohol strewn around the room.

Girl-A continues to break rules. Every time she takes a "swig" of the tequila, I define "swig" to no one in particular, stating that it does not include backwash and faking a wince. The glares from my girlfriend continue, and then begin to increase as I get more intoxicated because I start saying "sorry mom" whenever she gets obviously pissed at something I do. My friends are finding this hilarious. The game continues.

Another rule card. Guess who? Yep, the demon sitting next to me. This time, moms rule is to allow Girl-A to put her bra back on. Dude-A said bullshit. Dude-B made a "WTF?" face.

I went ballistic.


"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? THAT'S THE WORST FUCKING RULE I'VE EVER HEARD OF! SHE [pointing to Girl-A] MADE UP THE RULE!!! WHY ARE YOU SAVING HER FROM HER OWN DOING? IF ANY OF US WERE ON THE EDGE OF SHOWING SCHLONG YOU WOULDN'T DO THAT YOU GOD DAMN CHEATER!"

My friends can't stop laughing hysterically, my girlfriend and girl-B are screaming moronic arguments at me, and Girl-A is randomly looking around at each of us with pleading eyes.

"This is fucking bullshit. The next rule card I get, you know what it'll be? All girls naked. But none of you will do it, because you're all fucking cheaters. This game sucks."

I get up from the table and look in the fridge for some liquor to drink. My girlfriend says a bitchy "Whatever" and they continue the game with her stupid rule in place. I'm unimpressed with the plastic bottle and "$9.99" price tag of the first bottle of vodka I pull out, so I put it back and manage to find some Grey Goose. I have no idea where it came from, but my fridge = fair game, and took a couple shots.

I sat back down at the table with a clearly disgruntled expression. Someone asks if I'm still playing, I say I don't play with cheaters. After a few minutes of watching Girl-A lose her bra again and take many sips of tequila, I get up and declare:

"This is fucking stupid. Why are you even playing anymore. I'm going to find something less lame to do, like getting a barbed wire tattoo and drinking wine coolers while I watch 'What women want'. Peace faggots."

I get up, put my jeans back on and leave. I get to the parking garage at the bottom of the resort and find the other three guys (recently consumed shrooms) wandering around in between cars. I tell them about the girls being almost naked, they are awestruck, they question my sexual orientation for leaving, and convince me to come back up.

The games winding down by now. Unsurprisingly the girls are wearing no less clothing. The other guys are nonetheless excited. Somehow Girl-A and Girl-B decide to go streaking on the beach, to the dismay of my girlfriend and to the delight of everyone else. So everyone is down there and they do it. It was pretty weak imo. They ran away for 5 seconds and then back, holding their tits the entire time, and immediately get clothed. My girlfriend was making disapproving comments the whole time, not at the public intoxication / public indecency offenders over there, but at my own innocent self, purely a spectator to drunken revelry.

As we're walking back she makes an effort to keep her distance from me. I catch up to her and say with a grin, "You mad?"

She says nothing, and walks faster.

Still within earshot, I loudly state:


"This, this, will be a good week."

[grouch0jr]

lol, good reason for a fight, haha

[Darren P]

nice knowing you

[2MuchFun]

bitches be crazy. specially blonde ones. I found that out AGAIN yesterday.

[gd1996]

Not being there and in your situation... I agree with the friends lol! But I also been in positions where people would call me gay too. It's spring break, your suppose to go have fun, not fight!

[Red on Red WS6]

good thing the rest of the time she is going to be 30 miles away.

[01ws6er]

Awesome story Now I'm mad at you though cause you don't have f*&$%^& PICS!!!

You should just hook up with girl A and girl B, they seem pretty easy...

[ztrouble]

rule number 1. don't take sand to the beach dude. rule number 2 post up college tits

[0rion]

that's a long ass post right there. My advice would be that alcohol and a girlfriend/wife don't mix. I've tried it many many times with varying degrees of success. My wife and I have been together long enough now that she knows the rules.
When I get together with my buddies there's going to be plenty of excessive drinking and cussing. I'm going to say things that will embarass the hell out of her but for some reason unknown to her doesn't embarass me. It's easier on everyone involved if the wives keep to themselves preferrably in another room and at the end of the night I'm going to need someone to drive me home beause I'll be asleep in the passenger seat smelling like stale beer.
That's our system.

[DirtWad]

Proven Rule of thumb:

Girlfriend + Spring Break = Total Disaster

[BADASS2000SS]

that's a long ass post right there. My advice would be that alcohol and a girlfriend/wife don't mix. I've tried it many many times with varying degrees of success. My wife and I have been together long enough now that she knows the rules.
When I get together with my buddies there's going to be plenty of excessive drinking and cussing. I'm going to say things that will embarass the hell out of her but for some reason unknown to her doesn't embarass me. It's easier on everyone involved if the wives keep to themselves preferrably in another room and at the end of the night I'm going to need someone to drive me home beause I'll be asleep in the passenger seat smelling like stale beer.
That's our system.

WOW, you have a system! Way to be!

[0rion]

Proven Rule of thumb:

Girlfriend + Spring Break = Total Disaster

unless the girlfriend belongs to someone else

[BADASS2000SS]

unless the girlfriend belongs to someone else

Minor details!

[ls1blackbeauty98]

NICE!
i have to agree with the spring break plus girlfriend rule, it never goes down well!! sounds like u had atleast some fun

[ss~zoso~ss]

5 line rule buddy

[allbaugh_04]

Either don't take the gf or take her, and make her drink more so she's oblivious to everything.

[86 IROC-Z]

A little follow up:

We made up soon after (like always )

Dude-B and Girl-B hooked up, leaving one of the other guys without a bed and pissed.

Girl-A passed out on Dude-As bed, unknown to Dude-A until he wanted to go to sleep. He was pissed, and considered pushing her off, but then just decided to be nice and push her to the corner against the wall (twin sized bed).


We get drunk together most of the time. Sometimes its just me. The most hilarious time was when she had to drive us home in my car (Unsurprisingly, very unrefined compared to an Accord). But generally, either way, we're fine.

[hutch1999]

fun times

[SMWS6TA]

of girls A, B, and C

[cammed goat]

This...is...why...I LIKE THE QUIET LIFE. TOO MUCH B.S. TO DEAL WITH IN A RELATIONSHIP!!!!!