Ex-boyfriend deal...

**ls1blackbeauty98** · 05-04-2009, 07:28 AM

Originally Posted by cammed goat

There ya go.

But seriously, does she compare you to her exes? If so, then move on. I have heard that relationships die because of camparisons or "unfinished business". From working in a mall for a few years all the idiosyncratic ways were revealed from conversations I have heard.

GOD I LOVE CARS...problems can be fixed. Women...not so much.

I love cars too!!! treat them right and they will treat you just as good back, love em. relationships not so much. lol... no wonder we car people "fall in love" with cars. my beauty is my one true companion, and even though my window motor may be takin a crap on me...its ok ill fix it i wont start a fight over it with her

i need help.... haha

**TARZAN** · 05-04-2009, 09:14 AM

Bang her sister

-Will

**camaross0002** · 05-04-2009, 11:06 AM

Originally Posted by mrwdjv

I can totally understand where you are coming from. I am friends with most of my exes. There were some that I dated for like 5 mins and figured out I did not want to be in that kind of relationship with them, but I did want to be their friend. With that said, I can understand where she is coming from. On the other hand I know how I feel and know I can trust myself, but I cannot trust other people's motives. Whether that other person is my boyfriend or one of his exes or a girl he says is "just a friend". The male female relationship is so complicated and can reek havoc on your mind, body, and soul. Have you ever felt like this before? Do you normally have trust issues? If not and this have just became a problem with her, then you might have a point. I personally feel if she really valued you, your feelings, and the relationship she would understand this bothers you, maybe not why it bothers you, but that it does in fact bother you and just drop these people out of her life. If it is an emergency or something important they can leave a message, the two of you discuss it and decide if she should call them back. Just my thought!

I have to ask aren't you contradicting yourself here you were whining in another thread you started about how your boyfriend called an old ex now you think it's alright that you can be friends with your ex. Make up your mind.
Right here you are setting a double standard if you say your bf cant call his ex then why should you be allowed to.

To the op drop the bitch like it's hot you think it's drama now wait till eventually she says they are friends and next thing you know she banging them. Not worth the drama find a new piece of ass with less drama and enjoy life.

**camaross0002** · 05-04-2009, 11:15 AM

Originally Posted by mrwdjv

Yes, however his ex was "the one who got away" that his has been in love with for years! I just didn't feel the need to go into all the history!

but your still setting a double standard and whining about it. Whats to say you have an ex your talking to and was the one who got away but your not telling us about it.

**JHayesLS1** · 05-04-2009, 11:29 AM

Originally Posted by camaross0002

but your still setting a double standard and whining about it. Whats to say you have an ex your talking to and was the one who got away but your not telling us about it.

She is just her seeking attention for a few reasons:
1) Midlife Crisis
2) Can't get any offline

I'm sure 86 Iroc-z can add to that if he see's this.

**ls1blackbeauty98** · 05-04-2009, 12:51 PM

Originally Posted by camaross0002

I have to ask aren't you contradicting yourself here you were whining in another thread you started about how your boyfriend called an old ex now you think it's alright that you can be friends with your ex. Make up your mind.
Right here you are setting a double standard if you say your bf cant call his ex then why should you be allowed to.

To the op drop the bitch like it's hot you think it's drama now wait till eventually she says they are friends and next thing you know she banging them. Not worth the drama find a new piece of ass with less drama and enjoy life.

yea thats what i was thinking about the other chic and her thread about the bf calling the ex, i thought it was a bit conflicting but i didnt wanna say anything lol... anyway

shes crying says the BF talks to the ex, the "one that got away" haha, that does suck, even though ure still setting a double standard

**camaross0002** · 05-04-2009, 01:28 PM

Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

yea thats what i was thinking about the other chic and her thread about the bf calling the ex, i thought it was a bit conflicting but i didnt wanna say anything lol... anyway

shes crying says the BF talks to the ex, the "one that got away" haha, that does suck, even though ure still setting a double standard

now just wait we will see a thread of where she is going to tell us she is talking to an ex and wants to get back together with him. Some reason I see this in the near future.

But a true question is why is there a double standard on things from the aspect of both male and female. Why not just sit down or talk the shit out and come to a compromise if something of this nature cant be sought out then people need to go their own ways. Because due to the aspect of trust, insecurities and such things would never work out.

**toi tyme** · 05-04-2009, 05:36 PM

I am not friends with one ex that i slept with. But the exes that I didnt Im still cool with, dont really ever hang out, but if there was a random convo via internet or something it would be cool. A few of my exs have my current phone number, rarely talk to me.

Basically the ones I actually kinda still talk to never did me any wrong. They were mutual break ups, didnt really work.

But the guys I was serious with, i dont speak a word to them. dont care bout them I would have no problem dropping them if they tried to talk to me and my bf didnt like it.

But like others that I just liked, and nothing serious went down, then no biggie. I make it a point when Im not interested, and if the ex tries anything id shut him down so fast. And usually whatever bf i have at the time knows that im like that, and can be trusted.

**toi tyme** · 05-04-2009, 05:41 PM

Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

I love cars too!!! treat them right and they will treat you just as good back, love em. relationships not so much. lol... no wonder we car people "fall in love" with cars. my beauty is my one true companion, and even though my window motor may be takin a crap on me...its ok ill fix it i wont start a fight over it with her

i need help.... haha

lol thats cute

**JAGUAR5822** · 05-05-2009, 02:38 AM

toityme too bad you live 4 hours away, you're car and my car need to get together some time =)

**nhraformula** · 05-05-2009, 03:30 AM

Originally Posted by 0rion

dump her...life is too short for the drama. You'll never trust her completely and I can see why. Start calling some of your old ex's while she's in the same room and see how she reacts.

I agree, talk with some Exs in front of her.
Take it to another level and make yourself less available to the current G/F.
Mind fucking them is a beautiful thing

**ls1blackbeauty98** · 05-05-2009, 05:47 AM

OK QUESTION FOR THE GUYS!

why do some of you still talk to your ex? Why do you think some guys still talk to their ex gfs even when they have girlfriends? Im sure this question was answered in the other thread but lets bridge it all together lol...

**JHayesLS1** · 05-05-2009, 05:59 AM

I don't talk to the ones that I was slightly serious with because chances are I still hate that haha. But the ones that I had a high school crush on or something I just check in to see how college is going or their families vice versa.

**waldo** · 05-05-2009, 08:05 AM

I think we are only entertaining ourselves at this point. Musclefan21 has not posted since page one. Most likely abandoned the tread do to all the nonsense posts some have put up.
Nice that a fellow gearhead comes to us for advice and get shit on for it.

**tnthub** · 05-05-2009, 08:45 AM

Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

OK QUESTION FOR THE GUYS!

why do some of you still talk to your ex? Why do you think some guys still talk to their ex gfs even when they have girlfriends? Im sure this question was answered in the other thread but lets bridge it all together lol...

I still talk to an "ex" I had in college... We were very much in love and made an emotional decision to part ways based upon our life decisions at the time.

She went overseas due to her ROTC scholarship and I stayed here due to my Dad being sick and went into the family business. She knew my family and I knew hers.

We did not speak person to person again until she retired 25 years later.

She married a great guy and I married a great wife. Neither of us have children. Her Mom and my Mom passed away within months of each other. She likes my wife and I like her husband. Our spouses both know were were very close and respect what we have, understand why we have this closeness, and they both understand that they are number one. After 25 (now 30 years), this lady is like a sister to me. Sure we still have some mutual attraction but we both married our spouses because we love them and neither of us would do anything to disrespect our spouses.

I cannot put a name on what it is we have, but it has endured many years, ups and downs, and will always be there.

Our spouses have nothing to fear.

Now if you want me to talk about my ex-wife... We do not talk, we do not see each other, and I could care less if she fell off the side of the earth...

**ls1blackbeauty98** · 05-05-2009, 09:21 AM

thats just what i cant understand..

an ex gf shit on ya, and still guys talk to them... thats what i dont get!
if a guy did me the way i know some girls have done guys, i wouldnt talk to them at all.

**transamprincess98** · 05-05-2009, 09:32 AM

I am still friends with a few guys I have dated. I don't think an Ex is always a bad thing. Sometimes two people just don't make good in a relationship, but can be great as friends. Just look at Spaz and I. We still talk, he has met my BF I brought him with me to Spazapalooza. There is no harm in maintaining a friendship. As long as you trust your girl her exs shouldn't bother you.

**KahanaReef** · 05-05-2009, 09:55 AM

Originally Posted by transamprincess98

I am still friends with a few guys I have dated. I don't think an Ex is always a bad thing. Sometimes two people just don't make good in a relationship, but can be great as friends. Just look at Spaz and I. We still talk, he has met my BF I brought him with me to Spazapalooza. There is no harm in maintaining a friendship. As long as you trust your girl her exs shouldn't bother you.

That is pretty much the bottom line. I have had similar situations and the friendships have lasted well over 20 years...

**Jana** · 05-05-2009, 12:21 PM

Listen like you never listened before. Your happiness depends on it.

Everyone who mentioned trust is absolutely right. If you trust your girlfriend this should not be an issue. Speaking from experience it is very damaging to the relationship when you tell the other person who they can and can't talk to. They begin to feel trapped by you. Next thing you know she will start resenting you for being so insecure and the relationship will begin to fall apart. You have to understand that if she loves you and you treat her right...as someone else mentioned pages before... she won't have a reason to leave you. If you've done everything right and she still leaves you, then you know she was no good for you and you deserve better.

If you're thinking marriage you don't want to be with anyone whom you can't trust with other guys/girls even if you're not around for a month. The legal issues and financial/emotional cost of a divorce is just too much to risk with someone you don't fully trust, especially if you end up having kids together.

I'm with someone right now who completely trusts me and I trust him. I let him go have fun with his female friends and he's completely O.K. with me talking to my male friends. Even if I knew that one or two of them happen to have a crush on him it doesn't matter. They're just talking and I know he won't risk our relationship for a fling. If he does it's his loss, and if I do, it's my loss. We both know we love each other. I would be completely insane to give him up, and never in a million years would I hurt him by going behind his back with some guy friend even in a moment of weakness. We've introduced our friends to each other which makes us more comfortable, and usually we don't do too much hanging out with them unless we're all together. Still it's OK for us to do so if we choose. Phone calls and messaging is still completely normal, and there's nothing wrong with a simple "Hi, how are you?"

As soon as you try to control people they will start running away from you. You have to give them a reasonable amount of freedom. We're not talking sexual freedom with whomever they want, we're talking conversation, cup of coffee, lunch, the three of you hanging out in a yard having a beer. If your girlfriend loves you and you treat her right she won't have temptations or reasons to go to someone else for that boyfriend-type affection.

Keep these things in mind. Believe me I've been through it and I know what I'm talking about. It's always hard for people to listen to others' advice. Sometimes people just have to make their own mistakes to learn, but I hope you spare yourself the pain and just go with the good advice.

**310stanger** · 05-05-2009, 01:53 PM

Originally Posted by ls1blackbeauty98

OK QUESTION FOR THE GUYS!

why do some of you still talk to your ex? Why do you think some guys still talk to their ex gfs even when they have girlfriends? Im sure this question was answered in the other thread but lets bridge it all together lol...

Because the ex was probably a hot piece of ass and the guy still wants the chance to hit it. no other reason. If the guy has a current girlfriend, he has no reason to wanna talk to an ex other then because he is, is trying, or wants to fuck her.