I won't be even finishing the mods I'm doing

**Speedy_Gonzales** · 04-05-2008, 09:08 AM

Originally Posted by krese

if you post on a public forum you have put yourself in a position for other's opinions. if he didn't want other's opinions he shouldn't have posted.

imo giving a kid up for adoption is not the worst thing when you are not old enough to care for it. this will be a drain on him, his family and prolly the rest of us that pay taxes...

1. its a private forum
2. he ask for advice on how to HELP his girlfriend not cause her medical problems the rest of her life and have memories that she killed a baby or spending the rest of her life in guilt about giving up a child

**scotthd** · 04-05-2008, 10:30 AM

for starters congrats but the others are correct you dont have to have her prmission to get a paternity test you van buy them over the counter at the drug store the statistics are stagering how many guys are raising kids that are not theirs women tend to think kids are a way of fixing relationships Youhave to think about the child what is best for the child are you are your girl mentally and financially capable of handling this you have to think about the facts your child is going to base his veiws of the world and how he acts on houw you guys act personally i think you should wait to have a child you need to grow yourselfs first

**Blitzed** · 04-05-2008, 12:05 PM

Best of luck? Adoptripon mofo

**BULLET_WS6** · 04-05-2008, 12:20 PM

i found a song for ya...
http://youtube.com/watch?v=-8pTffeMSwM&feature=related
that recording is bs quality... so just take the title and d.l it or something... the lyrics in the song after the firt part will make you feel better about the situation...
basically guy was in similar situation said when the baby was born he realized it was the best mistake he ever made and

**zggill04** · 04-05-2008, 12:40 PM

Originally Posted by krese

if you post on a public forum you have put yourself in a position for other's opinions. if he didn't want other's opinions he shouldn't have posted.

imo giving a kid up for adoption is not the worst thing when you are not old enough to care for it. this will be a drain on him, his family and prolly the rest of us that pay taxes...

Your ridiculous.. IMO. You know what, I'd rather pay taxes for a MAN that owns up to the mistakes he's made. Granted he wasn't expecting a kid, but he is owning up to it. I'd much rather pay taxes for a MAN that needs help and is trying his hardest to provide for his NEW FAMILY, then some POS that sits on their ass with 5 kids and chooses not to work and doesn't even take care of the kids.

Now for advice. Tell your parents and sit down and talk with them. Ask them for advice on how and what you need to do, because like someone else stated, they have been their before. I know they offer free parenting classes so look into those. Remember that your gf is going to be an even worse and moody biatch then she ever has been with those hormones running through her, and she is going to start to have some weird ass cravings, just go with it. Also, right now I'd work your living ass off!! Maybe pick up another job for a little while to try and save up some money, and budget budget budget!! I have total respect for you taking on this responsibility, don't listen to these other people that are telling you to do something other than what you want to. But also remember, your young and just because your gf is pregnant doesn't mean you have to go and marry her, make sure she's the one.

**ss~zoso~ss** · 04-05-2008, 12:51 PM

dude just tell both of your parents now, them knowing that you two waited will only make them angry

**02cetransam** · 04-05-2008, 01:14 PM

was she taking the pill correctly? Did she miss a couple days taking them? Just curious.

**tnthub** · 04-05-2008, 01:22 PM

Forget the blood test. if she is your lady and you two have been exclusive then don't even give the blood test another thought as it does not matter.

A one nighter or a short term thingwith no true committment and you should be getting bloodwork done as you type... However you are in a different situation with a lady you love and respect.

She will be likely having mood swings and morning sickness so be there for her as best you can and you will get through this stuff together. Just get your parents into the loop as soon as you can so they have time to digest the situation and be as supportive as they are able. The cost of kids today is through the roof and something seemingly small like a baby shower can be extremely helpful.

I know this was not desired at this time but since it happened make the best of it. Life is not fair or easy but it sounds like you and your lady are making a choice that is right for you. As long as a child has good parents, regardless of the situation, who place the interests of the child first, then you can raise a good kid.

**310stanger** · 04-05-2008, 01:24 PM

Theres nothing wrong with an abortion for the people that choose to go that route. It can save a lot of hardship later on. People are real gung ho about having a kid till it actually pops out, you can't pay for things, the kid is crying, it needs medicine, you can't study or pay for school etc. All the love in the world aint gonna feed that kid.

All the people in the world telling ya you are doing the right thing aren't gonna get the doctors bills when that kid is sick and you dont have medical insurance because you can't maintain a job and go to school. Ever see what a medical bill looks like for just a routine checkup when you don't have med insurance? For the life of me I can't understand why 17 yr old kids dont wear condoms. Its so much cheaper, and im saying this with the girl being on the pill. Lots of girls get knocked up on the pill.

My post will piss you off but one way or another you are gonna have to come to grips with the bumpy road you are going down. I would really consider an abortion if I were you. If you had your own business, or made like 80k a year then I'd say go for it. But a 17 yr old kid doesnt have shit. I know because I WAS 17. Heck I dont have shit now. I know for a fact I could not support a kid at my age of 25.

**jimmybling31** · 04-05-2008, 02:11 PM

Originally Posted by Zboner

so i assume that you are in College? is she in highschool?

we are both in college.

**jimmybling31** · 04-05-2008, 02:13 PM

Originally Posted by 02cetransam

was she taking the pill correctly? Did she miss a couple days taking them? Just curious.

no she took it correctly. the doctor said her body got used to it and it quit working accordingly.

**MagicMan** · 04-05-2008, 02:15 PM

jesus christ. kids need top stop having fucking kikds. abort it you fucking retards

**jimmybling31** · 04-05-2008, 02:16 PM

Originally Posted by 310stanger

Theres nothing wrong with an abortion for the people that choose to go that route. It can save a lot of hardship later on. People are real gung ho about having a kid till it actually pops out, you can't pay for things, the kid is crying, it needs medicine, you can't study or pay for school etc. All the love in the world aint gonna feed that kid.

All the people in the world telling ya you are doing the right thing aren't gonna get the doctors bills when that kid is sick and you dont have medical insurance because you can't maintain a job and go to school. Ever see what a medical bill looks like for just a routine checkup when you don't have med insurance? For the life of me I can't understand why 17 yr old kids dont wear condoms. Its so much cheaper, and im saying this with the girl being on the pill. Lots of girls get knocked up on the pill.

My post will piss you off but one way or another you are gonna have to come to grips with the bumpy road you are going down. I would really consider an abortion if I were you. If you had your own business, or made like 80k a year then I'd say go for it. But a 17 yr old kid doesnt have shit. I know because I WAS 17. Heck I dont have shit now. I know for a fact I could not support a kid at my age of 25.

I'm sorry I don't make 80000 a year, but I do make 29000 a year. Just because I am 17 doesn't mean I am broke and can't afford anything. she has insurence so we aren't going to be paying for any of those bills either. in tennessee pregnant women can get insurence and then they keep it until the child is 18 years old.

**jimmybling31** · 04-05-2008, 02:18 PM

Originally Posted by ss~zoso~ss

dude just tell both of your parents now, them knowing that you two waited will only make them angry

not really. with my family it won't matter. if I wait til the summer and they see what I'm doing to save money and all I think they will be more understanding and see how I am treating it.

**jimmybling31** · 04-05-2008, 02:24 PM

Originally Posted by Zboner

if you do decide to move on your own, im sure that you already know that there are a TON of govt assit programs out there for single mothers (being that your not married to her? she is still "single") you can get rent free living and EBT card also so you can get food for free. you might as well get as much assistance as you can man and dont feel bad about asking for help or getting the help either man.

a few of my friends have had kids when they were 19-20 and they have gotten govt asistance, just go to your local center and apply for EVERYTHING that you can. lol

we are going to get as much as we can. we already looked into it. starting monday she will be recieving a card worth 200 in food per 2 weeks at certain stores. She also will be having her rent paid for for the next year by the government. I really don't let my ego get in my way here, it's just with my family they don't see how hard I work everyday. they think I am very irresponsible and most of my friends and my girlfriend can tell i am.

**jimmybling31** · 04-05-2008, 02:31 PM

Originally Posted by tnthub

Forget the blood test. if she is your lady and you two have been exclusive then don't even give the blood test another thought as it does not matter.

A one nighter or a short term thingwith no true committment and you should be getting bloodwork done as you type... However you are in a different situation with a lady you love and respect.

She will be likely having mood swings and morning sickness so be there for her as best you can and you will get through this stuff together. Just get your parents into the loop as soon as you can so they have time to digest the situation and be as supportive as they are able. The cost of kids today is through the roof and something seemingly small like a baby shower can be extremely helpful.

I know this was not desired at this time but since it happened make the best of it. Life is not fair or easy but it sounds like you and your lady are making a choice that is right for you. As long as a child has good parents, regardless of the situation, who place the interests of the child first, then you can raise a good kid.

yes I am in a very loving relationship with my girlfriend. I do have my heart in the right place. I want to raise this child to the best of my body's abilities. i already have been reading up on it. alreayd read the book she wanted me to read. I am already looking for another one.

for me and her the option of abortion or adoption is not even an option. we both already love the child even though it's the size of a piece of rice right now and we intend on doing the best we can.

**slpcamaro** · 04-05-2008, 02:32 PM

Listen to me I just went throught what you are i'm a little older and make about 60k I am the same type of person as you if i'm going to have a kid i'll make sure it's taken care of I dont' give a sh*t what i have to do. But you need to think about the kid in this one because not just you and her going to be stressed and mess with your life but the kid to, this will hurt the kid I know you have the best of intentions but this world revolves around money and you don't make enough i'm not trying to be mean at all please don't take me the wrong way. Once you add in cost of living chart it all out and see what things really cost how much is rent, food, gas, car payment if you have one it all adds up but it's the things you don't account for the screw you over what about medical does your job cover this and if she goes on as a single mother and your on the birth certificate guess who there coming at for money. Now you have to look at the gf I love mine to death but she wasn't ready in anyway shape or form I could have financially cared for it but you money's not the only thing I'll tell you 17 I thought I knew everything i'm 22 and think I do but I can look back now only a few years later and can tell I was an idiot. I'm not going to tell you what to do because thats wrong be me and gf decided to take that pill it wasn't that bad at all and I can honestly I did hurt and I hate putting personal things like this all over the place but it was for the best. I grow up in a fucked up childhood i'll tell you right now I have some shit wrong with me because of this and I would wish it on any kid. You have to know your ready in all ways its not a pet once it come out it's a human i'm guess you just found out so right now it's just some cells copying themselves desicion is up to but no ones going to look down on you for being smart enough to say I'M NOT READY if your not your going to fuck this kids life up good luck and I hope it all works out for the best but know this your not done growning and neither is she you guys are going to change soooo much over the next few year you don't understand you thoughts beliefs looks everything you really can't say your ready because your still learning and still becoming you so theres my piece i'm sure i'll get some shit for this but as much as I hated doing what I did it was for the best and I'd do it again feel free to message me if you have any questions again good luck on and last thing if you do have it get the test make sure. You have no idea the type of shit that happens and that i've seen your a fool if you don't she'll bitch for a few week but get over it. But thats only if you go through with it remember this is a decision you have to deal with for the rest of your life if you have it theres no rewind no i fucked up someone help me just i fucked up and my kids starving and the bitch left jk (worse case) but happens all the time if she leaves what are you going to do. Sorry this is soo long. but like i said message me if you have any questions I'm a manager so I have my laptop with me and i'm on all day.

**jimmybling31** · 04-05-2008, 02:33 PM

Originally Posted by MagicMan

jesus christ. kids need top stop having fucking kikds. abort it you fucking retards

burn in hell. would you kill a child if you loved it. If you love someone already and accidently got her pregnant would you want to just kill the child? NO! If you have a child with someone you love you would never want to kill it. If you really would do that then you are a horrible person and never deserve the gift of having a child. and yes it is a GIFT FROM GOD!

**MagicMan** · 04-05-2008, 02:43 PM

Originally Posted by jimmybling31

burn in hell.

You are showing your age and maturity level, kiddo.

would you kill a child if you loved it.

It's not "killing" if she's not too far along. No heartbeat = not "killing" in my book.

If you love someone already and accidently got her pregnant would you want to just kill the child? NO!

If I were 17? YES! I'm not 17 though and make enough to support a child should it happen.

If you have a child with someone you love you would never want to kill it. If you really would do that then you are a horrible person and never deserve the gift of having a child. and yes it is a GIFT FROM GOD!

I am Agnostic so giivng me the "God" stuff does nothing.

You are not thinking beyond yourself. You need to think about the welfare of the child. It's not going to be getting the life it deserves w/a 17 year old father making $29k. Don't be a moron.

**jimmybling31** · 04-05-2008, 02:43 PM

Originally Posted by slpcamaro

Listen to me I just went throught what you are i'm a little older and make about 60k I am the same type of person as you if i'm going to have a kid i'll make sure it's taken care of I dont' give a sh*t what i have to do. But you need to think about the kid in this one because not just you and her going to be stressed and mess with your life but the kid to, this will hurt the kid I know you have the best of intentions but this world revolves around money and you don't make enough i'm not trying to be mean at all please don't take me the wrong way. Once you add in cost of living chart it all out and see what things really cost how much is rent, food, gas, car payment if you have one it all adds up but it's the things you don't account for the screw you over what about medical does your job cover this and if she goes on as a single mother and your on the birth certificate guess who there coming at for money. Now you have to look at the gf I love mine to death but she wasn't ready in anyway shape or form I could have financially cared for it but you money's not the only thing I'll tell you 17 I thought I knew everything i'm 22 and think I do but I can look back now only a few years later and can tell I was an idiot. I'm not going to tell you what to do because thats wrong be me and gf decided to take that pill it wasn't that bad at all and I can honestly I did hurt and I hate putting personal things like this all over the place but it was for the best. I grow up in a fucked up childhood i'll tell you right now I have some shit wrong with me because of this and I would wish it on any kid. You have to know your ready in all ways its not a pet once it come out it's a human i'm guess you just found out so right now it's just some cells copying themselves desicion is up to but no ones going to look down on you for being smart enough to say I'M NOT READY if your not your going to fuck this kids life up good luck and I hope it all works out for the best but know this your not done growning and neither is she you guys are going to change soooo much over the next few year you don't understand you thoughts beliefs looks everything you really can't say your ready because your still learning and still becoming you so theres my piece i'm sure i'll get some shit for this but as much as I hated doing what I did it was for the best and I'd do it again feel free to message me if you have any questions again good luck on and last thing if you do have it get the test make sure. You have no idea the type of shit that happens and that i've seen your a fool if you don't she'll bitch for a few week but get over it. But thats only if you go through with it remember this is a decision you have to deal with for the rest of your life if you have it theres no rewind no i fucked up someone help me just i fucked up and my kids starving and the bitch left jk (worse case) but happens all the time if she leaves what are you going to do. Sorry this is soo long. but like i said message me if you have any questions I'm a manager so I have my laptop with me and i'm on all day.

well I know I'm not completely ready, but by the time I was 16 I already made 20 dollars an hour when I worked. i have many certifications in computer sciences and if I have to I can go back to doing computer work agian(though it bores me now) and quit working at the orthotic and prosthetic company I work for. she is getting enough stuff from the government to help that I think we can make it. the first 2 years after the child is born are going to be the hardest for us. after that it should be fairly easy. technically I am middle class by income already. once they know at work that I am going to be a father they will prolly give me a raise. I am the lowest paid person in there. the next lowest paid person makes 35 dollars an hour. I don't make near that right now. when they know that though I should get an immediate 50% raise. my father does own the company and he is very family oriented in it. he helps families all he can.

I know I am not ready, but we are not going to give up. we feel that if you try hard enough you can do anything, and we are putting our whole hearts behind this.