Y'all Are Gonna Think I'm Fucked Up

[ZAPFOOL!!]

hey I am lower than I have ever been....but some good music and some L vids and I am goo d to go....and yes I will include links

http://video.lightningrodder.com/top...3AC7E7BE28.htm

http://video.lightningrodder.com/rec...a2b4c81ec8.htm


just watching those gives me goals and reminds me what I have sitting in the garage, that I have earned and what it can do

[FuriousGeorge]

^ hey i was going to suggest the military too, especially if you can get a flying job (that's not an airborne surveillance tech). it's a constant paycheck, free college, and you get to make friends with the best people you've ever met. i will never regret joining the military, it's been a great experience. whenever you're getting down, you have 200 buddies bringing you right back up. good luck man, hope everything works out for you.

[310stanger]

im familiar with this shitty feeling, minus the suicide aspect. i look at it like a 1/4 life crisis so to speak. I'm 25, i make 30 k a year, and i deal with aggravation everyday. i have parts of my job i really enjoy and a lot that sucks. i wonder if i should leave it now while i can, or hang in there in hopes of making the big money. then i wonder if i leave, what will do? theres lots of kids my age i hear about all the time that are making all this money and i jus want in. I live at home with my mom and although its a great house in a great neighboorhood, i jus want out. its time. but i keep my head up and do whats within my control, i work hard at work in hopes of succeeding. it jus better start paying off REAL soon.

[ArcticZ06]

^ hey i was going to suggest the military too, especially if you can get a flying job (that's not an airborne surveillance tech). it's a constant paycheck, free college, and you get to make friends with the best people you've ever met. i will never regret joining the military, it's been a great experience. whenever you're getting down, you have 200 buddies bringing you right back up. good luck man, hope everything works out for you.

AWACS eh? Looks like you're stuck in Tinker! Bunch of my buddies are in AWACS. Im a ground AST/IDT/TT at TOP ROCK. If I could do it all over again I would definitely go for Loadmaster or Aerial Refueling. 1A4 seems like a good deal if you can get a UAV or AC130 position.

[astyles]

hey we all go through bad times....god knows i have and have had those same thoughts,but you know i am glad i worked out my probs and am here living my life now

[LETHALxLS1]

Suicide is not the answer brother. I know you feel like things are never gonna get any better for you but they are. Things are gonna turn around for you soon and you will look back and think "Damn-glad I didnt go through with that". You are young and the best times in your life are ahead of you. Although you dont believe it right now-there are endless possibilities for you man. Hang in there bud. Like alot of these guy said already-keep diggin dont quit. I know how it is to have health issues. I cant even tie my own shoes(its my back-I am not that retarded!!) LOL and cant stand very long. I had surgery last year that failed and I am looking at more surgery. I also got run over when I fell out of a moving truck in 97 and my knees are destroyed. To top it off my girlfriend of 12 years left me last year. I could go on and on but I wont. You just have to keep trying your best and hope for the best. Good luck man!

[Comedian]

Ok... time....


Normally, I'm a happy-go-lucky kinda guy. I try to be friendly to everybody, a genuine "nice-guy", I guess.

I'm slowly beginning to see, at my young age of 19 (IDK why my age is messed up), that it's getting me no where fast. Even still, I'm not gonna become a dick to everybody now, though.

I'm in, what I like to call, a "rut". I can't seem to hold a job, I'm not sure why, but I can't. It's just as hard for me to find a job, as well. I'm still claimed by my family, so I couldn't get financial aid for college, so I had to quit and go to work to try to support myself. I had a job as a car salesman. I did alright the month I was there, I sold 5, having never sold anything in my life. After a month, the dealership was screwing with mine and 6 other salepeople's money, so we all left. Took me about 2 months to find a job at a pharmacy for long term care facilities. I wasn't very well recieved by my co-workers and direct supervisors, so I was fired during my "probationary" period. They told me they had to constantly remind me to step up production, which was BS. Took me another couple of months to find a job at a small junk yard/parts place. Worked 2 weeks and was told I "wasn't what we're looking for". Nobody ever stood over me like bosses claimed. That was the middle of September. Now I've been without a job for a month. In NC, no car insurance is illegal. So my plates and my liscence are about to be taken away. Liscence because I thought I had a court date moved back for my seatbelt ticket and it wasn't.

My relationship with my family is stressed, to say the least. I don't really get along with my Ma or Stepdad. Granted my Stepdad has been like a father to me, but he always sides with my Ma. My Dad and I are too much alike, we can't be around each other for more than 30 minutes or so or we're at each other's throats. My Grandparents are about the only "family" that I really have.

My friends have helped me out on so many things, but I feel like a burden when I hang out. Only the job at the dealership has been considered "Full Time" but I wasn't there long enough for insurance, and I have medical problems. These problems keep me out of the military, as well.

I don't know what's wrong with me, but I'm beginning to think that suicide is the only way out. I know something's wrong with me, but I can't seem to fix it. I don't know what it is. I just feel like a nuisance to those around me. If I weren't around, my friends and family wouldn't have to worry about me. They wouldn't have to help me out. I wouldn't have to worry about anything...

I must live under a rock or something but I can't believe how many guys here have problems.. dude killing yourself isn't the answer and that also includes ragheads.

I’m sure there is free professional help you can go to.. At your age the sky is the limit. All you need to do is study, live at home, get a part time job picking dog shit off the ground and fucking as many girls as possible..

Also read a book

[Comedian]

Also live by this motto.

“What’s better then get your end in, is getting your friend in”

Not sure how that is going to help...

[tater_salad]

Thanks guys. I posted it here mainly because of the anonymity (sp?), the fact that nobody knows me. All of my friends would have told me what I wanted to hear, not necessarily what I NEEDED to hear.

Couple of y'all mentioned the military, I can't. It was in my previous post that medical problems keep me out. I would have joined up directly after high school.

I guess I'm being hard-headed or whatever, but I can't see how suicide is "selfish". My friends and my family can't blame themselves. They did what they could. I don't know... I keep hearing "the best years of your life" and all that jive, but I just don't believe it. I was told that about high school, and it pretty much sucked. Living at home sucks, I've gotten my circadian rhythm to where I'm awake when my family is away so I don't have to put up with the bullshit that I catch. I guess I'm just fucked up in the head.

[LETHALxLS1]

Nah your just going through a rough time. I wasnt a big fan of high school either dude. You keep mentioning your family giving you alot of shit etc. Think about having your own place in the near future and not having to deal with the family drama. Just keep trying man. Life is the most precious gift we have. Dont throw it away man. I know a guy who decided he wanted to kill his self. He pointed a shotgun with buckshot under his chin and pulled the trigger BUT right as he pulled the trigger something happened and his mind became clear and he didnt want to die and jerked the gun away from his neck-but it was too late. The shotgun blast blew off his jaw and some of his face. Now he walks around getting stared at by people because he is hideous looking. He cant eat solid food,he cant drink without a special adapter. He only THOUGHT things were bad before and didnt realize how good things actually were.

[tater_salad]

I've tried it twice, sucks knowing I suck at life and death...


Third time is a charm though...

[ArcticZ06]

Dude if you need someone to talk to hit me up on AIM or myspace. They're both in my profile.

[superchargedblackgto]

Dude if you need someone to talk to hit me up on AIM or myspace. They're both in my profile.

+1, I will talk to you. PM me, I'll give you my cell #, we'll get you on the right track......."YOU live in the greatest country on earth, when people around the world are starving and dieing, watching their children die, and you are bummed out because you can't find a job?.........Man remember it can always be worse, you just have to get it in perspective

[tater_salad]

No money = no phone...

[superchargedblackgto]

No money = no phone...

parents don't have one? I'll call you so its not long distance.......and not now either, it's 5am, for the luv of pete....LOL

[tater_salad]

True dat...

[ztrouble]

Man we are one big fucked up family here

[b.lee]

shit man, if anyone on here thinks life sucks.
grab a fat doobie and smoke it.
your problems will fade.
lol
It's pulled me thru a ton of crap.
like friends dying, family dying, and all that other depressing shit.
anywho who disagrees,

[ztrouble]

wish i could cuz

[Blitzed]

Hey Tater, I know SC already put it out there but I'd be more than happy to give you a call if you need it. I'm only 22 so it hasn't been long since i was 19. I also couldn't get into the Marines due to bad ankles