**** Da TRAIN!!! ****

[Kjz99z28]

no no to free your inhibitions....

...hahaha I'm gonna have to go with tap on this one.

[transamprincess98]

I'm surprised I didn't drunken dial Erick last night

Me and my friend went to crappyoke night at the local hole, had a loogey race on the awning outside and then went to the hick bar. When we got home we were trashed

[MechanicalMehem]

porrrkk goooooood, steak better

[Kjz99z28]

I'm surprised I didn't drunken dial Erick last night

Me and my friend went to crappyoke night at the local hole, had a loogey race on the awning outside and then went to the hick bar. When we got home we were trashed

He called me last night and just hung up. I told him I'm just not going to answer from now on.

[MechanicalMehem]

yes, however you have already been on drugs and there for couldnt drink alcohol....so more drugs

[MechanicalMehem]

you both could always call me, i'm always up.,....seems that way anyway

[MechanicalMehem]

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. "Hurry," she said, "stand in the corner." She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder. "Don't move until I tell you," she said. "Pretend you're a statue." "What's this?" the husband inquired as he entered the room. "Oh it's a statue." she replied. "The Smith's bought one and I liked it so much I got one for us, too." No more was said, not even when they went to bed. Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a sandwich and a beer. "Here," he said to the statue, "have this. I stood like that for two days at the Smiths' and nobody offered me a damned thing."

This is a joke I just read.

[Kjz99z28]

i like it

[MechanicalMehem]

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside. He looked up and said weakly, "I have something I must confess." "There's no need to," his wife replied. "No," he insisted, "I want to die in peace. I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!" "I know, I know," she replied. "Now just rest and let the poison work."

[MechanicalMehem]

these are coming off a website I always go to.....funny

[Kjz99z28]

hahahaha oh man.

[MechanicalMehem]

A married couple were lying in bed one night. The wife is curled up, ready to go to sleep, as the husband turns his bed lamp on to read a book.

As he's reading, he periodically reaches over to his wife and fondles her special area. He does this a few times, but only for a very short interval before turning back to read his book.

The wife gradually becomes more and more aroused and assuming that her husband is seeking some encouragement she gets up and starts stripping in front of him.

The husband is confused and asks, "Why are you taking off your clothes?" His wife replies, "You were rubbing me downtown. I thought it was foreplay." The husband says, "No, not at all." His wife asks angrily, "Well, then what the hell were you doing?" "I was just wetting my fingers so I could turn the pages.

[MechanicalMehem]

gives you an idea of the website....

[Kjz99z28]

Good lord. I'm afraid to ask.

[Kjz99z28]

Oh oh!! six more posts!! er.. five.

[MechanicalMehem]

This is a truly heart-warming story about the bond formed between a little girl and some construction workers. This makes you want to believe in the goodness of people and that there is hope for the human race.

A young family moved into a house next door to a vacant block. One day a construction crew turned up to start building a house on the empty block.

The family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and started talking with the workers.

She hung around and eventually the construction crew, all of the diamonds-in-the-rough, more or less... adopted her as a kind of project mascot. They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had coffee and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important.

At the end of the first week, they presented her with a pay envelope containing five dollars. The little girl took this home to her mother who said all the appropriate words of admiration and suggested that they take the five dollars that she had received to the bank the next day to start a savings account.

When they got to the bank, the teller was equally impressed with the story and asked the girl how she had come by her very own pay check at such a young age. The little girl proudly replied, "I worked all last week with a construction crew building a house."

"My goodness gracious," said the teller. "And will you be working on the house again this week, too?" The little girl replied, "I will if those useless cunts at the hardware joint ever bring us the fucking timber!”

[Kjz99z28]

I just don't know what to do with myself.

[MechanicalMehem]

four....

[Kjz99z28]

That one was funny

[MechanicalMehem]

I can do lots with you.......