How to pee with morning wood.

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03-07-2009, 09:37 AM
woodshed

How to pee with morning wood.

http://www.sexhax.com/peeing.html

I generally go for the plank or the strong arm method.
03-07-2009, 09:45 AM
Narcissistic

I'm a big fan of the Girly Man
03-07-2009, 09:51 AM
Spikito

I usually do a combo of the lunge and strong arm, or plank and strong arm. i tried to just pee up one time and arc it into the toilet, didnt work too good
03-07-2009, 09:53 AM
Narcissistic

Those last squirts are the dangerous ones. If you're using strong hand, you work out the speed/distance equation pretty quickly....But just when you think you're done. BAM! You just stained your wall and shower curtain.
03-07-2009, 09:55 AM
Boomer Sooner

Thats fucking hilarious!

After a long night of drinking I surrender to The Plank when I have to urinate.

As for morning wood, I usually just roll over, slide it in my girlfriends butthole and fill her up. Sure beats the hell out of having to get out of bed just to take a fucking piss.
03-07-2009, 10:19 AM
LT1 > LS1

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boomer Sooner

Thats fucking hilarious!

After a long night of drinking I surrender to The Plank when I have to urinate.

As for morning wood, I usually just roll over, slide it in my girlfriends butthole and fill her up. Sure beats the hell out of having to get out of bed just to take a fucking piss.

aaaaaaahahahahaha

btw, combine the plank and strong arm, you you got yourself a win!
03-07-2009, 10:40 AM
doozjamann

Plank or Strong arm
03-07-2009, 10:49 AM
SouthernBornThriller

Seriously? Nobody has tried the superman before?
03-07-2009, 11:01 AM
Justin23454

plank and strong arm
03-07-2009, 11:03 AM
Crimson Sin

Quote:

Originally Posted by SouthernBornThriller

Seriously? Nobody has tried the superman before?

Dude, if I did that, my fat ass and the toilet would both go through the floor..:true:
03-07-2009, 11:16 AM
mmciau

What a lot of bollocks!!

Just go outside and piss on the dog!!

Or if the dog's not around, water the bloody trees!!

Mike:D
03-07-2009, 11:16 AM
bmyers

link wont work!
03-07-2009, 11:44 AM
FSANE

Plank for me. :lol:
03-07-2009, 11:52 AM
Crimson Sin

This is Exactly why I told my wife I needed to install a urinal in the second bathroom (mostly mine anyhow)
She says it's lacking in taste if a friend has to use it... I differ, what dude doesn't want a urinal when he's purging a few beers ? and her friends can damn well use her Bathroom.. it's all pink and foo foo anyhow..
03-07-2009, 11:55 AM
Fotis

Quote:

Originally Posted by SouthernBornThriller

Seriously? Nobody has tried the superman before?

hell no that one is reserved for people with a tine dick....

i'm scared i'll touch the water or bowl wall
03-07-2009, 12:10 PM
Baseballstar425

Plank and strongarm here also
03-07-2009, 01:51 PM
doozjamann

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fotis

hell no that one is reserved for people with a tine dick....

i'm scared i'll tought the water or bowl wall

:lmao: Somebody told on theirself
03-08-2009, 03:26 AM
JoshieDoom

Piss in the sink. Fuck it.

I need to install a urinal
03-08-2009, 04:53 AM
ntimid8r7

Strongarm with a pinch and roll if it starts spraying everywhere....
03-08-2009, 05:05 AM
nitrox28

Am I the only one who pisses in the bathtub in the morning??
03-08-2009, 06:50 AM
astyles

Quote:

Originally Posted by nitrox28

Am I the only one who pisses in the bathtub in the morning??

nope im there too.........:wall:
03-08-2009, 04:18 PM
t-rock

i cant believe none of you have not done the "take a knee technique"

take a knee put elbow on bathtub strong arm and straighten opposite leg.
03-08-2009, 07:13 PM
Packy

I use the Shower as a urinal in this situation! :lmao:
03-08-2009, 07:32 PM
Benner

Quote:

Originally Posted by Packy

I use the Shower as a urinal in this situation! :lmao:

Bingo!!!! I'm usually a shower pisser in the morning. Occasionally I'll do a combo of the plank and strongarm.
03-09-2009, 09:23 AM
NoscamaroSS

Quote:

Originally Posted by nitrox28

Am I the only one who pisses in the bathtub in the morning??

Nope, I always take a shower in the morning, so I take that opportunity to relieve myself. Dont have to worry bout hitting a hole.
03-11-2009, 04:30 PM
t-rock

dont be surprised if your toe nails turn yellow
03-11-2009, 05:56 PM
02Sweet

Quote:

Originally Posted by t-rock

dont be surprised if your toe nails turn yellow

not yet been doing it for years:dunno:
03-11-2009, 09:20 PM
jaslivers

:yawn:
get out of bed
stretch
get into shower
peeeee
03-11-2009, 09:56 PM
ls1ya

the superman, girlyman and that yoga shit are for the dickly challenged. i hate touching the water or the bowl so the only thing that works is the plank and strong arm. or wack off a quicky then let go after the nut.
03-11-2009, 10:10 PM
Spikito

Quote:

Originally Posted by nitrox28

Am I the only one who pisses in the bathtub in the morning??

i got your back man :true:
03-12-2009, 07:28 AM
Spaz

Quote:

Originally Posted by nitrox28

Am I the only one who pisses in the bathtub in the morning??

nope...
03-12-2009, 10:51 AM
Y2KSS1363

Quote:

Originally Posted by fsane

plank for me. :lol:

+1

:d
03-12-2009, 10:56 AM
toi tyme

:lmao:

this thread is hilarous!!!
03-12-2009, 11:28 AM
02Sweet

Quote:

Originally Posted by toityme

:lmao:

this thread is hilarous!!!

so do you pee in the shower:luvlove:
03-12-2009, 11:37 AM
toi tyme

Quote:

Originally Posted by 02Sweet

so do you pee in the shower:luvlove:

hahah do I or have I? :D:D
03-12-2009, 11:37 AM
Smkn_TA

Plank + Strong Arm for sure. And bust a nut like nobodies bidness if I gotta sit down and shit cause I can't fit betweens the seat with humungo
03-12-2009, 11:40 AM
toi tyme

ahhahahahaha SOO funny!

Im glad I can sit for every time..... haha
03-13-2009, 08:47 AM
NoscamaroSS

Quote:

Originally Posted by toityme

Im glad I can sit for every time..... haha

Lazy Ass!! :D
03-13-2009, 11:02 AM
Rhinohuey

:lol: im gonna have to try superman
03-14-2009, 05:28 PM
Smkn_TA

Quote:

Originally Posted by toityme

ahhahahahaha SOO funny!

Im glad I can sit for every time..... haha

Yeah it ain't fun when your standing there during one of those long bladder emptying moments and you get a cold chill. The uncontrollable spasm of your whole body as is magnifys threw you. It would be impossible to hit a bath tub at those times. I think half the time it's better to just go with it, if you try to fight it and tense your arms it just makes it worse. Then your moms all "If you sprinkle when you tinkle be a sweetie and whipe the seatie".
03-14-2009, 06:29 PM
86 IROC-Z

This all sounds like so much fun.

I have ED :(
03-16-2009, 11:08 AM
Musclefan21

Plank. strong arm sometimes but it kind of makes it hard still. :lmao:
03-16-2009, 01:20 PM
eddielb

plan strong arm and one leg forward/strong arm combo haha
03-16-2009, 05:44 PM
grouch0jr

i plank almost everytime i piss

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