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03-25-2010, 07:40 AM #1
What Tiger Woods should have said
At the press conference:
"To my wife, I'm sorry. I fucked up but I'm not changing so you'll either need to put up with this shit or I'll stroke you the check that I agreed to in the pre-nup.... sorry.
To my fans, get over it. Where I stick my dick is none of your business. If you care.... sorry. I don't need any of you in order to make 10 times as much in one year than you'll make in a life time. I promise to continue to hit 4 irons from 210 yards to within 10' of the hole and drop puts that you couldn't read in a million years. If that's not good enough for you, then go watch tennis...
To the media. You cocksuckers are the only ones more two-faced than I am. Kissing my ass for all those years and then ripping me every chance you've had since Thanksgiving. Fuck All ya'll. I'm glad I don't have to take the time to sit and answer the same bullshit questions over and over again.
To the other golfers. Kiss my cablanasian ass! You motherfuckers come out ripping me when I've put more fucking money in your pockets than you could ever count.
You think anyone's been paying to see Jesper-fucking-Parnavik? Give me a fucking break. I'm almost tempted to give up golf just to punish you guys but I think it's going to be more fun to practice for the next few weeks and get back to making you all my bitches...
That's all I got today folks..... see ya at Augusta !.... Oh, and Bambi, if you're listening I'll meet you at the Ritz in 45 minutes... T "
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03-25-2010, 07:42 AM #2
I agree....
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03-25-2010, 07:49 AM #3
LOL! Spot on, spot on.
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03-25-2010, 07:51 AM #4
That's pretty good
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03-25-2010, 07:57 AM #5
dude, the press conference was over a month ago
you're slipping
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03-25-2010, 08:06 AM #6
Nice.
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03-25-2010, 08:09 AM #7
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
Now Tiger and songstress Leann Rhymes were supposedly an 'item' until her daddy stepped in.
Last edited by SiggyZ; 03-25-2010 at 08:11 AM.
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03-25-2010, 08:19 AM #8
I like it.....but i think it would drive fans away.
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03-25-2010, 08:31 AM #9
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QuickSilverMetallic- 2005 GTO M6
Doesn't matter what he says or who he says it to. He's proven himself to be another sports figure who is an ever increasing pile of shit. I wish Elin would have beaten him to death with a 9 iron. Then this shit would be over with.
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03-25-2010, 09:15 AM #10
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03-25-2010, 09:20 AM #11
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03-25-2010, 09:34 AM #12
If people worried as much about themselves as they do everyone else... the world would be a much better place imo.
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03-25-2010, 09:43 AM #13
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03-25-2010, 10:12 AM #14
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03-25-2010, 10:33 AM #15
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03-25-2010, 11:35 AM #16
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03-25-2010, 01:53 PM #17
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03-25-2010, 07:29 PM #18
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03-25-2010, 09:01 PM #19
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03-26-2010, 07:39 AM #20
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