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Understanding women

This is a discussion on Understanding women within the Almost Anything Goes forums, part of the Off - Topic / Discussion forums category; Originally Posted by ZAPFOOL!! the last two post remind me i need to call and warn brian and scott Go ...

  1. #41
    back 'n better than ever Kjz99z28's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ZAPFOOL!! View Post
    the last two post remind me i need to call and warn brian and scott
    Go for it

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    For understanding women, it just doesn't happen. My wife is 10 years younger than me and we started dating between her junior and senior years in college.

    All the odds were against me.... I was ten years older and she had an unlimited supply of college age guys around... She had (and still does have) a great figure... Plus she had enough personality to be nicknamed "radar" by her girlfriends because she could spot a good looking guy long before anyone else. Add to the situation that her college was three hours away from where I lived and I was all set up for dissapointment.

    The bottom line is she had the real qualities that I was looking for such as integrity, honesty, old fashioned values, and she had traditional parents who brought her up well. I took a chance and she took a chance.

    When she left college she wanted to go to England with her girlfriends and get a summer job. Instead of getting all insecure and nit wanting her to go I took her shopping so she could buy a bunch of nice summer clothes and gave her a suitcase filled with old change (about $400.00 worth of change) so she had so extra cash and could get the most out of the experience. It was a big risk as I secretly believed she would find some european stud and never come back...

    Within three weeks she bought a plane ticket and came home. Why? She missed me and wanted me there to share the expeirence with her. I got lucky.

    All you can do it to try and assess the woman's character and take an educated gamble. Good luck.
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    Member gd1996's Avatar
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    If this is how she is now, hope you get used to dealing with it. I've dated a girl for about 16 months off and on and shes 6 years younger than me, shes 25 now. She seems so interested for a few days, then like not at all for a few... so I find the best thing is just do what she does, don't call, text etc... then she wants to talk and see me. The girls hot, fun to be with, just makes me happy, thats why I do it. I guess ya gotta play their game, thats part of dating younger girls. At 25 I was the same way too, at 31 I'm not quite into that same bs, but I'm getting used to it.

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    Member Popeye1970's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tnthub View Post
    For understanding women, it just doesn't happen. My wife is 10 years younger than me and we started dating between her junior and senior years in college.

    All the odds were against me.... I was ten years older and she had an unlimited supply of college age guys around... She had (and still does have) a great figure... Plus she had enough personality to be nicknamed "radar" by her girlfriends because she could spot a good looking guy long before anyone else. Add to the situation that her college was three hours away from where I lived and I was all set up for dissapointment.

    The bottom line is she had the real qualities that I was looking for such as integrity, honesty, old fashioned values, and she had traditional parents who brought her up well. I took a chance and she took a chance.

    When she left college she wanted to go to England with her girlfriends and get a summer job. Instead of getting all insecure and nit wanting her to go I took her shopping so she could buy a bunch of nice summer clothes and gave her a suitcase filled with old change (about $400.00 worth of change) so she had so extra cash and could get the most out of the experience. It was a big risk as I secretly believed she would find some european stud and never come back...

    Within three weeks she bought a plane ticket and came home. Why? She missed me and wanted me there to share the expeirence with her. I got lucky.

    All you can do it to try and assess the woman's character and take an educated gamble. Good luck.
    That sounds very encouraging, especially when you mention those moral qualities...may be I'll be lucky too, but of course people always mention the age difference as a major obstacle as if they were implying that it was merely depending on your age whther you're mature or not.

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    Member Popeye1970's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gd1996 View Post
    If this is how she is now, hope you get used to dealing with it. I've dated a girl for about 16 months off and on and shes 6 years younger than me, shes 25 now. She seems so interested for a few days, then like not at all for a few... so I find the best thing is just do what she does, don't call, text etc... then she wants to talk and see me. The girls hot, fun to be with, just makes me happy, thats why I do it. I guess ya gotta play their game, thats part of dating younger girls. At 25 I was the same way too, at 31 I'm not quite into that same bs, but I'm getting used to it.
    'Playing their game' is the part I don't really like as I'm not of a very patient character, it becomes like a frenzy staring at the cell phone, waiting for some text message or checking the email in vain...it might drive me nuts...those up and downs: exactly as you say: "she seems so interested for a few days, then like not at all for a few"

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    down in it 310stanger's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kjz99z28 View Post
    I guess we have a different perspective on things. I've seen it work. I've also seen it fail. But just because some people's marriages fail doesn't mean I have to lose faith in trying something that I believe in.

    If you think you are going to lose your feelings for somebody in 5-10 years, wtf are you doing marrying them? I mean I know that there are people in the "early stages" that can't see past that puppy love thing... and I do think you need to be together for quite some time before considering marriage. You have to have gone through things and make sure you can handle problems together, blah blah blah.

    I absolutely hate the idea of never getting married because you're just waiting for it to end. That just seems to set the relationship up to fail. It's saying "No, I don't want to commit to you, something better may come along." That would never work for me. It would always feel temporary.

    Everybody's got their own thing, own opinions. But I do believe that I will hopefully be married one day, not for a long damn time, and not unless I am 100% comfortable with the idea, and once I get married, I will do my best to make it work. I know nothing is guaranteed, but you can bet I'll do everything in my power to make it work.
    Thats not the point im making. The point I'm making is that people that end up divorced got married thinking they were gonna love each other forever. Hell my parents were together for nearly 20 yrs. Its not like they got married in 1979 and said, "you know I think I'm gonna be sick of your ass by 1985." Marriage is way more then the love of someone. Throw in houses, kids, car payments, mortgages, careers etc and it changes everything.

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    back 'n better than ever Kjz99z28's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 310stanger View Post
    Thats not the point im making. The point I'm making is that people that end up divorced got married thinking they were gonna love each other forever. Hell my parents were together for nearly 20 yrs. Its not like they got married in 1979 and said, "you know I think I'm gonna be sick of your ass by 1985." Marriage is way more then the love of someone. Throw in houses, kids, car payments, mortgages, careers etc and it changes everything.
    I get that. I really do.. but part of it is vowing to work through those changes, and to change together.

    I know that that doesn't work 100% of the time. I know that shit happens sometimes, and the only thing you can do is call it quits.

    But that doesn't mean I have to give up on marriage as a whole, and definitely doesn't mean that if/when I find someone I am devoted to enough to make that commitment that I shouldn't, or that I should set it up for failure, or that I can't give it 100% and try my hardest to make it work.

    My parents are the perfect example of all the odds stacked against them, and they still have made it work, and they are actually still happy. They got married right after HS, were young, blah blah blah, and this year was 25 years. They've had one HUGE problem that I can think of, but they worked through it. I was honestly afraid they weren't going to make it for a few days there, but they pulled through, and I can seriously say that they seem happier now than they were before.

    I am an optimist. If anybody says "Why get married? X amount of marriages just end in divorce." Then I say "Well, that means X amount of people are in marriages that DO work." When it does work, I think it's a wonderful thing, and it's something that I believe in and one day will work toward.

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    10 Years Strong cammed goat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kjz99z28 View Post
    I guess we have a different perspective on things. I've seen it work. I've also seen it fail. But just because some people's marriages fail doesn't mean I have to lose faith in trying something that I believe in.

    If you think you are going to lose your feelings for somebody in 5-10 years, wtf are you doing marrying them? I mean I know that there are people in the "early stages" that can't see past that puppy love thing... and I do think you need to be together for quite some time before considering marriage. You have to have gone through things and make sure you can handle problems together, blah blah blah.

    I absolutely hate the idea of never getting married because you're just waiting for it to end. That just seems to set the relationship up to fail. It's saying "No, I don't want to commit to you, something better may come along." That would never work for me. It would always feel temporary.

    Everybody's got their own thing, own opinions. But I do believe that I will hopefully be married one day, not for a long damn time, and not unless I am 100% comfortable with the idea, and once I get married, I will do my best to make it work. I know nothing is guaranteed, but you can bet I'll do everything in my power to make it work.
    I agree. If I give 100%, I want 100% in return. I know couples argue, but I want to be happy in my relationship, should I ever become involved in one.

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    sounds to me like she was getting busy while you were gone and is feeling guilty

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    down in it 310stanger's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kjz99z28 View Post
    I get that. I really do.. but part of it is vowing to work through those changes, and to change together.

    I know that that doesn't work 100% of the time. I know that shit happens sometimes, and the only thing you can do is call it quits.

    But that doesn't mean I have to give up on marriage as a whole, and definitely doesn't mean that if/when I find someone I am devoted to enough to make that commitment that I shouldn't, or that I should set it up for failure, or that I can't give it 100% and try my hardest to make it work.

    My parents are the perfect example of all the odds stacked against them, and they still have made it work, and they are actually still happy. They got married right after HS, were young, blah blah blah, and this year was 25 years. They've had one HUGE problem that I can think of, but they worked through it. I was honestly afraid they weren't going to make it for a few days there, but they pulled through, and I can seriously say that they seem happier now than they were before.

    I am an optimist. If anybody says "Why get married? X amount of marriages just end in divorce." Then I say "Well, that means X amount of people are in marriages that DO work." When it does work, I think it's a wonderful thing, and it's something that I believe in and one day will work toward.
    I didnt mean to tell you to not get married, its your life and your decisions. But speaking for myself, I don't see it happening. However, I was responding to the comment you made. I agree with what you are saying on not going into a marriage with a negative outlook. But my point is that people that get divorced often arent negative in the beginning. They go into it with the best intentions, totally thinking that everything in the "now" is the way its gonna be. Its not a matter of them "not understanding" what they are getting into. Also a lot of people that are married and end up getting divorced DO try and make it work, for way too long at that. Hell my parents went through a lot of counseling. According to my dad it was a total waste of money too. You cant change the way people are when its not working. Its just who they are at that point.

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    Veteran 0rion's Avatar
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    The number one thing in a marriage is you have to understand that people have faults. You're gonna get pissed off and so are they. It's how you act and deal with it that'll make the difference. You have to be able to voice your opinion and let them do the same then kiss each other and let it go. That kiss may take a day or so to happen but you have to make up and just accept the other person as they are.

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    down in it 310stanger's Avatar
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    Member Popeye1970's Avatar
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    Yeah, one should write a book...let's do it right here ...online Let's figure out the title first: "On women" or "Women for dummies" or whatever else you figure out...
    i'm in...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Popeye1970 View Post
    'Playing their game' is the part I don't really like as I'm not of a very patient character, it becomes like a frenzy staring at the cell phone, waiting for some text message or checking the email in vain...it might drive me nuts...those up and downs: exactly as you say: "she seems so interested for a few days, then like not at all for a few"
    It's to the point I'm just used to it, so it's not like I am playing really... I'm not very patient at all either. I just go with it as I know if we do fight, we break up, fight some more... then end up back together every time. So got to the point I just say whatever and go with it. I'm not totally happy, but I'm happier like this than without her. So what can ya do. She also works two job and basically 3-4 days a week she just works all day, 8am-10pm plus 30 min drive each way. But I am pondering things now... somethings gotta change.

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    back 'n better than ever Kjz99z28's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 310stanger View Post
    I didnt mean to tell you to not get married, its your life and your decisions. But speaking for myself, I don't see it happening. However, I was responding to the comment you made. I agree with what you are saying on not going into a marriage with a negative outlook. But my point is that people that get divorced often arent negative in the beginning. They go into it with the best intentions, totally thinking that everything in the "now" is the way its gonna be. Its not a matter of them "not understanding" what they are getting into. Also a lot of people that are married and end up getting divorced DO try and make it work, for way too long at that. Hell my parents went through a lot of counseling. According to my dad it was a total waste of money too. You cant change the way people are when its not working. Its just who they are at that point.
    I Know no one gets married expecting it not to work, or that they ever think it will come to that point. What I meant about not understanding vows is that a lot of people (definitely not all by a longshot, but quite a few) go into like (i think Orion) said. They think it will work great. But then the part about changing and problems come into play, and some people just don't understand how to evolve with it, how to adapt, and how to change/react with certain situations. Some people are just too stubborn to try to adjust to whatever's happened. That's when I think they didn't understand the vows they chose to make.

    Anywho. I know marriage isn't something for everyone.


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    I am Useless Ice Spiral's Avatar
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    Here's what I'd do:

    Go out with her one night. Both of you get very drunk.

    You wake up the next morning with the half-naked bitch laying next to you covered in vomit, in your bed.

    Your dick itches and is covered in a white crusty substance. OK, so you fucked her.

    Kick her out, never talk to her again.

    OR............

    You wake up totally alone, and the cocktease bitch ends up with her other guy.

    So, never talk to her again anyway.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Ice Spiral View Post
    Here's what I'd do:

    Go out with her one night. Both of you get very drunk.

    You wake up the next morning with the half-naked bitch laying next to you covered in vomit, in your bed.

    Your dick itches and is covered in a white crusty substance. OK, so you fucked her.

    Kick her out, never talk to her again.

    OR............

    You wake up totally alone, and the cocktease bitch ends up with her other guy.

    So, never talk to her again anyway.
    Getting really sloshed is always an option, but may be the only one who gets drunk is me, as most women don't drink that much...so waking up alone is kind of realistic.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 310stanger View Post
    I figured out women...... Make a lot of money
    That's the gameplan

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    Impounded 86 IROC-Z's Avatar
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    Understanding women







    Oh... You're serious?


    I hate to be the one to break this to you, but ah...


    Unfortunately not possible, given the current laws of physics.


    Sorry man

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