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Thread: Sh*t my dad says
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10-01-2010, 12:24 PM #1Consumer of kraut
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
Sh*t my dad says
"You came out of your mom looking like shit. She thought you were beautiful. Don't know what scared me most, your looks or her judgment."
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10-01-2010, 12:25 PM #2Consumer of kraut
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
"Nervous? In 5 billion years the sun will burn out and nothing you did will matter. Feel better?"
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10-01-2010, 12:28 PM #3Consumer of kraut
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
"Put the rake down. I don't wanna sit around watching you 'give it your best.' Either stop sucking or get the fuck out of the way."
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10-01-2010, 12:31 PM #4Consumer of kraut
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
"See, you think I give a shit. Wrong. In fact, while you talk, I'm thinking; How can I give less of a shit? That's why I look interested."
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10-01-2010, 12:33 PM #5Impounded
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Everything fiberglass- 2005 Amberlamps
I love this guy
Originally Posted by SiggyZ
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10-01-2010, 12:35 PM #6Consumer of kraut
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
"Invite them. A wedding is a loaded gun. Don't be the asshole staring down the barrel asking which button makes the boom noise."
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10-01-2010, 12:40 PM #7Consumer of kraut
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
"Don’t focus on the one guy who hates you. You don’t go to the park and set your picnic down next to the only pile of dog shit."
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10-01-2010, 12:51 PM #8Consumer of kraut
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
"Engagement rings are pointless. Indians gave cows...Oh sorry, congrats on proposing. We good now? Can I finish my indian story?"
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10-01-2010, 12:56 PM #9Bone it like you own it
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Black / Stryker Blue- 2K WS.6/ 2K9 G8GT
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10-01-2010, 12:57 PM #10Consumer of kraut
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
"Look, we're basically on earth to shit and fuck. So unless your job's to help people shit or fuck, it's not that important, so relax."
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10-01-2010, 01:04 PM #11Consumer of kraut
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
"No. Humans will die out. We're weak. Dinosaurs survived on rotten flesh. You got diarrhea last week from a Wendy's."
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10-01-2010, 01:17 PM #12Consumer of kraut
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
"They're offended? Fuck, shit, asshole, shitfuck; they're just words...Fine. Shitfuck isn't a word, but you get my point."
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10-01-2010, 01:27 PM #13Consumer of kraut
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
“You seen my cell phone?...What’s it look like? Like two horses fucking. It’s a phone, son. It looks like a phone."
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10-01-2010, 01:37 PM #14Detailing + Design
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My life is a- Ben Stiller movie.
"I like the dog's standpoint: If i can't hump it or eat it, i'll piss on it and walk away."
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10-01-2010, 02:27 PM #15Member
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Steel blue pearlcoat- 2000 dodge intrepid
I brought you in this world I will take you out,and it don't metter to me because I can make another one just like you.
Son practice the dumptruck method,dump your load and leave.
When I get home I am gonna half kill you (been half killed so many times I am uberundead)
don't lie to me boy I have been there and done that long before you was even swimming in nutville
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10-01-2010, 02:46 PM #16Consumer of kraut
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
"I’m not sure you can call that roughing it, son… Well, for one, there was a fucking minivan parked forty feet from your sleeping bags.”
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10-01-2010, 03:04 PM #17Giant Dicks Car Club
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2005 Ram- 1978 Firebird
after coming out of the bathroom "I just shook the piss outta your daddy."
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10-01-2010, 03:27 PM #18She Moderator
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Arctic White- 2000 Camaro Z28
Um... Mom's can say that. Not so much Dads. It's Mom that carries you and actually brings you into this world Originally Posted by cuervo25_1
Just saying
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10-01-2010, 03:58 PM #19Veteran
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without the father there will be nothing to carry Originally Posted by KahanaReef
Um... Mom's can say that. Not so much Dads. It's Mom that carries you and actually brings you into this world
Just saying
just saying 
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10-01-2010, 04:00 PM #20Consumer of kraut
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Light Pewter Metallic- y2k 8-cylinder catfish
"Waking up when you got a baby, you feel like you drank a bottle of whiskey the night before, except the shit's in someone else's pants."
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