school lunch dilema

**0rion** · 09-23-2008, 06:22 PM

Monday my boy got off the bus and told me and the wife that an older girl on the bus ate his left over lunch. No big deal really except he said he was saving it until he got home and didn't want her to eat it. What would you tell him to do about it?
I have a couple of different options I thought of ranging from the right thing to do to me possibly going to jail.

I first told him to say something to the bus driver. ( right thing to do)
I told him to laugh at her and ask if she's poor in front of everyone ( just funny)
I also said to tell her not to take it and if she reaches for the lunch box punch her square in the face. ( probably get him in trouble at school and get his ass kicked by a girl)
I asked the wife on her thoughts of letting me make some of my famous ex-lax brownies to put in his lunch box ( probably resulting in a jail sentence for me)

the wife was against the brownie idea which doesn't surprise me and I have no desire to go to jail anytime soon so I went with "tell the bus driver" or punch her in the face. I figure he'll learn a lesson out of it.

**ArcticZ06** · 09-23-2008, 06:31 PM

How big is this older girl? I don't know many chicks that go around stealing food unless they are HOOOOONGRAAAY!

**nitrox28** · 09-23-2008, 06:33 PM

Put a hammer in your sons backpack...

**zero_proto** · 09-23-2008, 06:37 PM

tell him to throw some bows and shake his dreads, after words he can put his stunna shades on. After that no girl will steal his lunch.

**Kennedy** · 09-23-2008, 06:53 PM

This older girl, is her name Derek by any chance?

**Spaz** · 09-23-2008, 07:04 PM

what about broken glass in the brownies??? give him some pepper spray or chloroform... hmm... how about he just tell her "you know what is funny... you ate my brownies... i knew you would... that is why i put strychnine in them... do you know what that is... it's a poison... do you feel a bit strange yet??? you will in about a hour... first evey thing will start to move a bit slow... your body will feel numb... you'll feel good for a little... then your chest will start to hurt... and then your heart will beat in a fluctuant manner... and you will slowly and painfully die... i can give you the antidote... but it will cost you your lunch every day from here on out... you don't want to die do you??? you know you shit and piss your self when you die right???"

**GTP231** · 09-23-2008, 07:09 PM

Teach him to put her in a headlock and fart in her face and ask her if it tastes good

**Y2KPewterSS** · 09-23-2008, 07:43 PM

Mousetrap ftw

**KahanaReef** · 09-23-2008, 08:41 PM

I know you just want to protect him. It's so hard when they have to learn to make their own way in the world.

But, unless she is some sort of bully, he'll just have to figure out for himself how he wants to handle the situation. He'll learn how to stand up for himself soon enough.

But, if she is a bit of a bully, I would make sure he pointed her out to me and then I would make sure she knew that I wasn't going to put up with her crap. I'd make direct eye contact with her everyday when the bus picked up and or dropped off

Kindergarten can be tough man! Hang in there Dad

**axxdet** · 09-23-2008, 08:52 PM

I like the browine idea, just put in a little bit, just enough so she'll feel it later, late that happen for a couple days, and hello sore ass hole

**suede** · 09-23-2008, 10:12 PM

Tell him to keep the pimp hand in shape.....

That or tell him to bargain with her, food for well no scratch that, there is a thing as too young......

**bodyman5000** · 09-23-2008, 10:39 PM

Tell him to tell her this.

"you are a girl, my daddy says girls are supposed to bring men a sandwich not eat them...so bitch, tomorrow you best bring me a sandwich"

**Nastyfoot** · 09-24-2008, 03:23 AM

I think that if he tells the girl not to eat his lunch you would 1) Teach him the importance of standing up against injustice and 2) It would teach others around him that he is not a pushover possibly resulting in them questioning their own future whether to take advantage of someone!

Good lessons to be taught to him here w/o him even realizing it.

**B34M3R** · 09-24-2008, 03:49 AM

Teach him the purple nurple. Bitch won't try to steal his shit again.

**Spaz** · 09-24-2008, 04:21 AM

Originally Posted by B34M3R

Teach him the purple nurple. Bitch won't try to steal his shit again.

yeah... give her a "tit and run"...

**0rion** · 09-24-2008, 04:26 AM

he'll be alright. Tough to figure out what to tell him because these years he's very impressionable and will pretty much listen to what I tell him. I'd rather him be the type of person that uses wit and outsmarts people but there's also a time and place to pop somebody in they eye too.

As a kid growing up when I would fight ( haven't fought in years but I'd still be the same way) I used to always try to get at least one good shot in the eye. They'll wake up for a week looking at the black eye and remembering who gave it to them.

**Spaz** · 09-24-2008, 04:41 AM

Originally Posted by 0rion

he'll be alright. Tough to figure out what to tell him because these years he's very impressionable and will pretty much listen to what I tell him. I'd rather him be the type of person that uses wit and outsmarts people but there's also a time and place to pop somebody in they eye too.

As a kid growing up when I would fight ( haven't fought in years but I'd still be the same way) I used to always try to get at least one good shot in the eye. They'll wake up for a week looking at the black eye and remembering who gave it to them.

both eyes get black if you break thier nose...

**slphwk1** · 09-24-2008, 04:42 AM

Maybe there is some romance in his future. I would tell him to share his lunch w/her! You never know where it might lead!

**Smkn_TA** · 09-24-2008, 05:02 AM

Tell him when he finishes lunch, spit on ALL of his food. So if she takes it, he still wins. Or better yet, take it out of the box, then spit on it in front of her.