Random thoughts...

[FORD RECOVERY EXPERT]

I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.



More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.



Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.



I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they've invented the lighter?



Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.



That's enough, Nickelback.



I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.



The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase "Regards" again.



Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.



There is a great need for sarcasm font.



Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what was going on when I first saw it.



I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.



The other night I hit a new low at an open bar. I had already hopped on highway blackout when, inevitably I had to find a bathroom. Eventually I decided it was probably on the other side of the bar so I tried to walk over there, but ran into a guy coming the other way. We played that, Both go left, Both go right game to no avail, so I finally put out my hand to guide myself past and that's is when I realized, yup, that's a mirror I just tried to walk through. And the guy on the other side is me. Even cats can recognize their own image.



How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?



I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.



I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.



The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.



A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.



Was learning cursive really necessary?



Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".



I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.



Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.



My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads. Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired about the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us." Classy, bro.



Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".



How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?



I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!



Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in' examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"



What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?



While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.



MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.



Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.



I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.



Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.



I would like to officially coin the phrase 'catching the swine flu' to be used as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an ugly woman. Example: "Dave caught the swine flu last night."



I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.



Bad decisions make good stories



Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!



If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.



Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem....



You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.



Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.



There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.



I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.



"Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.



I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'



While watching the Olympics, I find myself cheering equally for China and USA. No, I am not of Chinese descent, but I am fairly certain that when Chinese athletes don't win, they are executed.



I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damn!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?



I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.



When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.



I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.



Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...



As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.



Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.



It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.



I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.



I think that if, years down the road when I'm trying to have a kid, I find out that I'm sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from the fact that I was not aware of my condition in college.



Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.



Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...



My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?



I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.



I think the freezer deserves a light as well.



I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.



The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimate d that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There's nothing like being made to feel fat before dinner.

[Mr. Luos]

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

This is my devil.
Seriously.

[35th-ANV-SS]

These are so so true. Nice!

[FORD RECOVERY EXPERT]

How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?


This one is most me.....

[blackSS01]

Awesome post, a few of those easily pertained to me

[FORD RECOVERY EXPERT]

I have also been guilty of looking at my watch 3 consecutive times, w/o knowing what time it was afterwards....

[preston1980]

Great post, I actually laughed at some so hard I cried a little. Do you have any more?

[cammed goat]

Great thread.

[FORD RECOVERY EXPERT]

Isn't it great that, among units of measurement in the U.S., we have the inch, the foot, the yard, the mile...and the football field?

If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a
cup of boiling water
down your throat. Presto! The blockage will
instantly remove itself.

Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by
getting someone else to hold while you chop.

Avoid arguments with the Mrs. About lifting the toilet seat by using
the shower.

For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut
yourself and bleed for few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your
arteries. Remember to use timer.

A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock,
will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you
hit the snooze button.

If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you
will be afraid to cough.

You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct
Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

[FORD RECOVERY EXPERT]

Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before.


How young can you die of old age?


I bought some batteries, but they weren't included.


I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five.


I intend to live forever. So far, so good.


If a word in the dictionary were mispelled, how would we know


I went to a store and asked if they had anything to put under coasters.


I have an existential map. It has 'You are here' written all over it.


Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.


You can't have everything. Where would you put it


A friend of mine once sent me a postcard with a picture of the entire planet Earth taken from space. On the back it said, Wish you were here.


The Meaning Of Life The reason that we're all here is that it was too crowded where we were supposed to go.


What's another word for Thesaurus


If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it


Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.


What happens if you're walking down the street wearing glasses, when the prescription ran out.


Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.


Is there a parking lot at a fire hydrant factory?


It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it.


It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.


If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?

When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes.'


I have the worlds largest seashell collection. You may have seen it, I keep it spread out on beaches all over the world.


When I have a kid, I wanna put him in one of those strollers for twins, then run around the mall looking frantic.


They say the sun never sets over the British Empire, but it rises every morning. The sky must get awfully crowded.


I installed a skylight in my apartment. The people who live above me are furious!


I just bought a microwave fireplace. You can spend an evening in front of it in only eight minutes.


Cross-country skiing is great if you live in a small country.


The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.


Every now and then I like to lean out my window, look up and smile for a satellite picture.


Today I met with a subliminal advertising executive for just a second.

[Neo]

Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before.


How young can you die of old age?


I bought some batteries, but they weren't included.


I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five.


I intend to live forever. So far, so good.


If a word in the dictionary were mispelled, how would we know


I went to a store and asked if they had anything to put under coasters.


I have an existential map. It has 'You are here' written all over it.


Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.


You can't have everything. Where would you put it


A friend of mine once sent me a postcard with a picture of the entire planet Earth taken from space. On the back it said, Wish you were here.


The Meaning Of Life The reason that we're all here is that it was too crowded where we were supposed to go.


What's another word for Thesaurus


If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it


Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.


What happens if you're walking down the street wearing glasses, when the prescription ran out.


Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.


Is there a parking lot at a fire hydrant factory?


It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it.


It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.


If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?

When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes.'


I have the worlds largest seashell collection. You may have seen it, I keep it spread out on beaches all over the world.


When I have a kid, I wanna put him in one of those strollers for twins, then run around the mall looking frantic.


They say the sun never sets over the British Empire, but it rises every morning. The sky must get awfully crowded.


I installed a skylight in my apartment. The people who live above me are furious!


I just bought a microwave fireplace. You can spend an evening in front of it in only eight minutes.


Cross-country skiing is great if you live in a small country.


The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.


Every now and then I like to lean out my window, look up and smile for a satellite picture.


Today I met with a subliminal advertising executive for just a second.

I think almost all of that is Stephen Wright. I love his stuff

[ls1blackbeauty98]

Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

i will agree to that!

[tep98ws6]

I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.

I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

i think about those four all the time, esp the scantron one. that ALWAYS runs thru my mind when i'm taking a test!

[TS99SS147]

The higher the level of education a person has the lower the level of common sense. This usually pertains to automotive engineers and members of congress.

[86 IROC-Z]

I actually usually piss in empty water bottles because i'm too lazy to go up the washroom (that and because my morning dump is usually so massive that i need to let it sit in the water for a couple of hours to dissolve a bit otherwise i plug the can). I also bring empty bottles to school/work and pee in them and then dump the urine into the sink because i HATE using urinals/tiolets and getting all that gross pee/poo water splashing off of the bowl/urinal and onto my legs and ****...ICK!!

When i'm done with the bottles i usually gather them all into a bag and bike up to my old public school and toss them onto the roof of the school while doing that shot-put motion that those shot-puters in the olympics do... i usually try to get as much air as i can.

feels good man.

[hamburger68]

that first post is scary, only a few lines i couldn't relate to...

[FORD RECOVERY EXPERT]

RANDOM FACTS
__________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ _____



There are twice as many kangaroos in Australia as there are people. The kangaroo population is estimated at about 40 million.

Police dogs are trained to react to commands in a foreign language; commonly German but more recently Hungarian.

The Australian $5 to $100 notes are made of plastic.

St. Stephen is the patron saint of bricklayers.

The average person makes about 1,140 telephone calls each year.

Stressed is Desserts spelled backwards.

If you had enough water to fill one million goldfish bowls, you could fill an entire stadium.

Mary Stuart became Queen of Scotland when she was only six days old.

Charlie Brown's father was a barber.

Flying from London to New York by Concord, due to the time zones crossed, you can arrive 2 hours before you leave.

Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least 6 feet (2 m) away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the flush.

You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching TV.

A lion's roar can be heard from five miles away.

The citrus soda 7-UP was created in 1929; "7" was selected because the original containers were 7 ounces. "UP" indicated the direction of the bubbles.

Canadian researchers have found that Einstein's brain was 15% wider than normal.

The average person spends about 2 years on the phone in a lifetime.

The fist product to have a bar code was Wrigleys gum.

The largest number of children born to one woman is recorded at 69. From 1725-1765, a Russian peasant woman gave birth to 16 sets of twins, 7 sets of triplets, and 4 sets of quadruplets.

Beatrix Potter created the first of her legendary "Peter Rabbit" children's stories in 1902.

In ancient Rome, it was considered a sign of leadership to be born with a crooked nose.

The word "nerd" was first coined by Dr. Seuss in "If I Ran the Zoo."

A 41-gun salute is the traditional salute to a royal birth in Great Britain.

The bagpipe was originally made from the whole skin of a dead sheep.

The roar that we hear when we place a seashell next to our ear is not the ocean, but rather the sound of blood surging through the veins in the ear. Any cup-shaped object placed over the ear produces the same effect.

Revolvers cannot be silenced because of all the noisy gasses which escape the cylinder gap at the rear of the barrel.

Liberace Museum has a mirror-plated Rolls Royce; jewel-encrusted capes, and the largest rhinestone in the world, weighing 59 pounds and almost a foot in diameter.

A car that shifts manually gets 2 miles more per gallon of gas than a car with automatic shift.

Cats can hear ultrasound.

Dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors.

The highest point in Pennsylvania is lower than the lowest point in Colorado.

The United States has never lost a war in which mules were used.

Children grow faster in the springtime.

On average, there are 178 sesame seeds on each McDonalds BigMac bun.

Paul Revere rode on a horse that belonged to Deacon Larkin.

The Baby Ruth candy bar was actually named after Grover Cleveland's baby daughter, Ruth.

Minus 40 degrees Celsius is exactly the same as minus 40 degrees Fahrenheit.

Clans of long ago that wanted to get rid of unwanted people without killing them used to burn their houses down -- hence the expression "to get fired"

Nobody knows who built the Taj Mahal. The names of the architects, masons, and designers that have come down to us have all proved to be latter-day inventions, and there is no evidence to indicate who the real creators were.

Every human spent about half an hour as a single cell.

7.5 million toothpicks can be created from a cord of wood.

The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.

A 41-gun salute is the traditional salute to a royal birth in Great Britain.

The earliest recorded case of a man giving up smoking was on April 5, 1679, when Johan Katsu, Sheriff of Turku, Finland, wrote in his diary "I quit smoking tobacco." He died one month later.

"Goodbye" came from "God bye" which came from "God be with you."

February is Black History Month.

Jane Barbie was the woman who did the voice recordings for the Bell System.

The first drive-in service station in the United States was opened by Gulf Oil Company - on December 1, 1913, in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.

The elephant is the only animal with 4 knees.

Kansas state law requires pedestrians crossing the highways at night to wear tail lights.

[FORD RECOVERY EXPERT]

If you have 3 quarters, 4 dimes, and 4 pennies, you have $1.19. You also have the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar.
The numbers '172' can be found on the back of the U.S. $5 dollar bill in the bushes at the base of the Lincoln Memorial.

President Kennedy was the fastest random speaker in the world with upwards of 350 words per minute.

In the average lifetime, a person will walk the equivalent of 5 times around the equator.

Odontophobia is the fear of teeth.

The 57 on Heinz ketchup bottles represents the number of varieties of pickles the company once had.

In the early days of the telephone, operators would pick up a call and use the phrase, "Well, are you there?". It wasn't until 1895 that someone suggested answering the phone with the phrase "number please?"

The surface area of an average-sized brick is 79 cm squared.

According to suicide statistics, Monday is the favored day for self-destruction.

Cats sleep 16 to 18 hours per day.

The most common name in the world is Mohammed.

It is believed that Shakespeare was 46 around the time that the King James Version of the Bible was written. In Psalms 46, the 46th word from the first word is shake and the 46th word from the last word is spear.

Karoke means "empty orchestra" in Japanese.

The Eisenhower interstate system requires that one mile in every five must be straight. These straight sections are usable as airstrips in times of war or other emergencies.

The first known contraceptive was crocodile dung, used by Egyptians in 2000 B.C.

Rhode Island is the smallest state with the longest name. The official name, used on all state documents, is "Rhode Island and Providence Plantations."

When you die your hair still grows for a couple of months.

There are two credit cards for every person in the United States.

Isaac Asimov is the only author to have a book in every Dewey-decimal category.

The newspaper serving Frostbite Falls, Minnesota, the home of Rocky and Bullwinkle, is the Picayune Intellegence.

It would take 11 Empire State Buildings, stacked one on top of the other, to measure the Gulf of Mexico at its deepest point.

The first person selected as the Time Magazine Man of the Year - Charles Lindbergh in 1927.

The most money ever paid for a cow in an auction was $1.3 million.

It took Leo Tolstoy six years to write "War & Peace".

The Neanderthal's brain was bigger than yours is.

On the new hundred dollar bill the time on the clock tower of Independence Hall is 4:10.

Each of the suits on a deck of cards represents the four major pillars of the economy in the middle ages: heart represented the Church, spades represented the military, clubs represented agriculture, and diamonds represented the merchant class.

The names of the two stone lions in front of the New York Public Library are Patience and Fortitude. They were named by then-mayor Fiorello LaGuardia.

The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built, engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the books that would occupy the building.

The sound of E.T. walking was made by someone squishing her hands in jelly.

Lucy and Linus (who where brother and sister) had another little brother named Rerun. (He sometimes played left-field on Charlie Brown's baseball team, [when he could find it!]).

The pancreas produces Insulin.

1 in 5,000 north Atlantic lobsters are born bright blue.

There are 10 human body parts that are only 3 letters long (eye hip arm leg ear toe jaw rib lip gum).

A skunk's smell can be detected by a human a mile away.

The word "lethologica" describes the state of not being able to remember the word you want.

The king of hearts is the only king without a moustache.

Henry Ford produced the model T only in black because the black paint available at the time was the fastest to dry.

Mario, of Super Mario Bros. fame, appeared in the 1981 arcade game, Donkey Kong. His original name was Jumpman, but was changed to Mario to honor the Nintendo of America's landlord, Mario Segali.

The three best-known western names in China: Jesus Christ, Richard Nixon, and Elvis Presley.

Every year about 98% of the atoms in your body are replaced.

Elephants are the only mammals that can't jump.

The international telephone dialing code for Antarctica is 672.

World Tourist day is observed on September 27.

Women are 37% more likely to go to a psychiatrist than men are.

The human heart creates enough pressure to squirt blood 30 feet (9 m).

Diet Coke was only invented in 1982.

There are more than 1,700 references to gems and precious stones in the King James translation of the Bible.

When snakes are born with two heads, they fight each other for food.

American car horns beep in the tone of F.

Turning a clock's hands counterclockwise while setting it is not necessarily harmful. It is only damaging when the timepiece contains a chiming mechanism.

[FORD RECOVERY EXPERT]

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.

Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury






Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.

Coca-Cola was originally green.






It is impossible to lick your elbow.

The state with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska

The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% ( now get this...) The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%

The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400

The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour: 61,000

Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.

The youngest pope was 11 years old.

The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.

Those San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments

.
Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:Spades - King David, Hearts - Charlemagne, Clubs - Alexander theGreat, Diamonds - Julius Caesar






111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321






If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in The air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in The air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the Horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.

Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th, John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2, but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later.

"I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

Q. What occurs more often in December than any other month?
A. Conception.

Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
A. Their birthplace

Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested?
A. Obsession

Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter "A"?
A. One thousand

Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?
A. All invented by women.

Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey





Q. There are more collect calls on this day than any other day of the year?
A. Father's Day

Q. What trivia fact about Mel Blanc (voice of Bugs Bunny) is the most ironic?
A. He was allergic to carrots.

Q. What is an activity performed by 40% of all people at a party?
A. Snoop in your medicine cabinet.


In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase "goodnight, sleep tight".

It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in- law with All the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month we know today as the honeymoon.

In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts. So in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them mind their own pints and quarts and settle down. It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"

Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the Rim or handle of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase Inspired by this practice.

In Scotland, a new game was invented. It was entitled Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden.... and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.

AND FINALLY At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow!

[Neo]

Nope.

It's quite possible to lick your elbow. A friend of mine can, I've seen her do it. I'll try to get pics next time (it's not unattractive if i do say so myself)

I've seen others do it too