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Thread: Psychopath nut cat.
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07-02-2009, 07:59 PM #1
Psychopath nut cat.
I mentioned in another post I had an epic war with one of the wifes cats,so here is the story.
My wife thought it would be a good Idea to give the cats a bath one day,so yours truely got nominated. Well suprising enough I bathed all 4 cats without so much as a scratch.The problem arose 2 days later.
I came home from work and noticed that the psycho Black cat had a very swollen ear. I asked my wife to come look at it because she had a better chance of touching her than I did. well she looked and told me to grab the cat carrier ,so I did. as I walked through the house with it everycat that seen it split. I get to the bedroom where she was laying on the bed. she kinda opened her eyes long enough to see the carrier then her eyes bugged out and straight under the bed she went.
This is where the war begins, I reach under the bed to get greeted with both front paws claws extended straight at my hand. Luckily she missed, but she went futher under the bed. so I flipped the matress and box springs up against the wall.the little smart ass hid behind them.
About that time my then almost 2 year old son came running,knowing full well what she was capable of I yelled to the wife to grab him and shut the door. soon as she did that I flipped the boxsprings and matress back on the frame and she started to dive under.Well I managed to grab her....so I thought. she twisted sunk both front paws worth of claws in my hand,both hind paws worth of claws in my forearm, and all 4 canines in my thumb. I screamed like there was no tomorrow. the wife came in to see my hand closed around the cats face. she asked what I was doing I told her either the cat lets go or it isn't making it to the vet. she went into the bathroom grabbed a towel and wrapped up the cat. then pried the demons teeth from my gushing thumb. she covered the spawn of satans head then pulled all the claws from my arm and hand. then tossed her in the carrier and shut the true Jersey Devil in.
I immediatly went to the bathroom and started pouring alcohol,peroxide and any othe antiseptic on my poor right appendages. the wife had the nerve to ask if I was going to help her at the vet. I said hell no get him to tranq her ass.
even with all the alcohol,peroxide, bentadine, my thumb still got infected. bad enough where I could barely bend it. I finally said screw it and just kept working with it until all the nasty assed infection finished oozing out. Then I called Dad.
Dad you see was a farm boy and had his fair share of run ins with the animals.I told him what happened and how bad my thumb was. he told me this.... Make a paste out of salt and water then put the paste on your thumb. you should do this in the bathroom because you will piss yourself otherwise. so I did that and like he said it was immediate stinging beyond what the alcohol did and the Immediate need to pee. Also like he said the paste started drawing out the infection,really quickly at that.
So for the three days since the origeonal war ,I was still doctoring myself up. meanwhile the demon,satan spawn , jersey devil from hell was looking at me like "wanna try me again" the pisser of it all was she was fully grown and weighed only a couple pounds. she was about the size of a 6-8 month old kitten.
After that however there was a mutual respect to each other. ocassionally she would let me pet her.,pick her up,or even rub her belly, the latter being immediate murder attempts from her. My son Could do what he wanted to her and get away with it. she was one weird cat.
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07-02-2009, 08:10 PM #2
Once the cat was in the cage, should have thrown her into the back of an LSX car. Then take her for a wild ride.
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07-02-2009, 08:19 PM #3
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Black / Stryker Blue- 2K WS.6/ 2K9 G8GT
^
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07-02-2009, 08:57 PM #4
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My life is a- Ben Stiller movie.
i hate cats.
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07-02-2009, 09:15 PM #5
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07-02-2009, 09:48 PM #6
Thanks for the story
demon,satan spawn , jersey devil from hell
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07-03-2009, 03:34 AM #7
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07-03-2009, 04:29 AM #8
My cat is crazy too. He lets my 3yr old daughter pick him up and do whatever but as soon as I walk into the room he takes off. I used to love cats but I'm looking forward to this one being gone and sticking with dogs.
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07-03-2009, 04:40 AM #9
we had a cat growing up that we think is part Siamese. she'd let you pet her on her terms, lol. my wife and i now have two cats. they are both about 14 lbs (healthy) and love attention. one of them i can pick up and hold any direction (right side up, upside down, etc) and she doesn't care. the other is a little more skiddish but loves to be rubbed.
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07-03-2009, 04:51 AM #10
cuervo25 1: 0 small pussy: 1
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07-03-2009, 08:40 AM #11
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07-03-2009, 08:50 AM #12
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Hahaha ! Excellent story !
Reminds of something an old marine once told us kids when we asked what being in some battle he had been in was like... This is what he said ( You can probably better understand this than most) ..Wanna know what it was like do yeh ? Strap 10 housecats to yer nekkid body and run around screaming bloody murder as you light off lots of fireworks.. Then leap into a ice cold shower.... All them pissed off scared cats will let you know what it was like better'n I can..
Good poultice your dad suggested.. Sorry that happened to you... Just be happy it wasn't a Maine Coon Cat (thats not racial, it's a breed ) Them sumbitchs can get 13-18 pounds.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maine_CoonLast edited by Crimson Sin; 07-03-2009 at 08:52 AM. Reason: link
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07-03-2009, 11:43 AM #13
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07-03-2009, 02:31 PM #14
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07-03-2009, 02:33 PM #15
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07-03-2009, 02:35 PM #16
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07-03-2009, 02:53 PM #17
There is the spawn of satan,demon spawn,psycho bitch, jersey devel from hell
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07-03-2009, 03:37 PM #18
declaw that bitch
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07-03-2009, 03:48 PM #19
Can't she is dead
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07-03-2009, 05:40 PM #20
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