My Friday Night

***SMWS6TA*** · 10-05-2009, 09:51 AM

My niece (16) decides to go out on a “date” with one of her guy (16) friends to the fair. He was there before I came home from work. And is waiting in my home office/computer room (It’s my sanctuary in the house) while my niece is finishing up. I’ve met him slightly before but never had enough time to talk. Well my niece is doing the girl running late thing. So he asks about some of my Army memorabilia. I give some explanations. He looks nervous because my niece has told him I am a combat vet and have no qualms in taking out A-holes that threaten my family. He’s being respectful and polite. Not the typical HS dicks I see every time I go to the school for something.

So I finally ask him out right:

Me - Are you dating?
Him - Ahhh, I’m, I’m ahh, excuse me sir, could you ask the question again?
Me - Are you dating?
Him - I’m not sure
Me - Not a good answer, you either are dating or your not. Which is it?
Him - I, ahh We ahh (face turning red as an apple now and now I’m going to have some fun!)
Me - Hey it’s an easy question, oh tried to breath, I don’t need you passing out and hitting your head. That’s it breath (color returning to normal)

Me - So which is it?
Him - I’m not sure?
Me - Not sure? Whose decision is it?
Him - I, I mean we haven’t talked about anything like that yet.
Me - You’ve gone out about 5-8 times this over the summer and you two haven’t talked about that yet . I know you’ve thought it at least once…. Any ways, (Now I have him so off balance, All of this is in rapid fire questioning)

Me - Who is going with you? What time you bring her home?
Him - Ahh , I,
Me - Come on out with it…I beginning to question on letting her go. I want someone that will respect her and protect her. You are starting to give me some doubts here.

(Face turning red again) Then my wife and niece both come in from the back yard and ruin everything…..

Her - Leave the poor boy alone, I already got what you’re looking for. (Damn it, no more fun). My niece trying not to laugh knew what I was doing. I wink at her and then I turn to the poor guy – Well be good, enjoy tonight, glad we had this talk, and remember what we talked about.

His head was still spinning as they left.

Later that night, my niece tells my wife that he is scare of me, and I made him very nervous. She had to tell him it was my way of feeling him out. Make sure she wasn’t going to have any trouble. I think next time I’ll do something different.

Looking for some suggestion Sarge.....

**Hi-Po** · 10-05-2009, 09:55 AM

Nice.

**86 IROC-Z** · 10-05-2009, 09:56 AM

awesome

**310stanger** · 10-05-2009, 10:00 AM

You can bet on it that girl isnt ever getting disrespected by that kid. ENGLISH MOTHER FUCKER DO YOU SPEAK IT?! "OH DID I BREAK YOUR CONCENTRATION?!"

***SMWS6TA*** · 10-05-2009, 10:02 AM

I forgot to say after they left my wife said I am such a Dick sometimes and was enjoying it too much. I told her it's a father's right and i was just warming up when our daughter get's that age.....

**JHayesLS1** · 10-05-2009, 10:14 AM

Get a big bucket of sand and put it by your front door. Next time they go out ask tell him you want to show him something. Walk over to the sand and say "Now listen here, this is special sand. And tonight, after you two get back from your date you are going to dip your dick into this here sand. If ONE grain sticks your ass is mine. Now have fun."

**toi tyme** · 10-05-2009, 11:34 AM

my dad was in the army for like 15 years i think... he never really asked the boys questions.. hes the nicest man EVER...but guys always said that he would stare at them. Id never notice this... but they would be nervous around him cuz he'd just look at them.... lol

**bigrondownhiller** · 10-05-2009, 03:51 PM

If you have some guns just show him and tell him of shooting people when you were in the army.

**EnjoiJoe** · 10-05-2009, 06:02 PM

When I ment my girls dad a year ago he did the same routine and scared the shit out of me haha. I know how this kid feels be nice to him

**cammed goat** · 10-05-2009, 07:06 PM

Originally Posted by 310stanger

You can bet on it that girl isnt ever getting disrespected by that kid. ENGLISH MOTHER FUCKER DO YOU SPEAK IT?! "OH DID I BREAK YOUR CONCENTRATION?!"

You've been watching "The Boondocks" I see.

**wheeliE-maxx** · 10-05-2009, 07:09 PM

Originally Posted by JHayesLS1

Get a big bucket of sand and put it by your front door. Next time they go out ask tell him you want to show him something. Walk over to the sand and say "Now listen here, this is special sand. And tonight, after you two get back from your date you are going to dip your dick into this here sand. If ONE grain sticks your ass is mine. Now have fun."

Holy fucking win. I need to remember this for the future if I have nieces/daughters.

***SMWS6TA*** · 10-05-2009, 07:14 PM

Originally Posted by bigrondownhiller

If you have some guns just show him and tell him of shooting people when you were in the army.

I didn't have to. My niece already told him that I have confirmation out to 500m with an M4.

"You can run, you are just going to die tired!"

Originally Posted by cammed goat

You've been watching "The Boondocks" I see.

Luv that movie, I now know where I had my reference from when I was speaking to him

Originally Posted by wheeliE-maxx

Holy fucking win. I need to remember this for the future if I have nieces/daughters.

Every father dreads the day he mets the boy/man that takes his daughter out. He remembers how much of a dog he was and knows he has come home in spades....

**raynor139** · 10-05-2009, 07:17 PM

Haha i plan to do the same thing to my nieces dates in a few years when she is old enough.

**Hi-Po** · 10-05-2009, 07:30 PM

Originally Posted by 310stanger

You can bet on it that girl isnt ever getting disrespected by that kid. ENGLISH MOTHER FUCKER DO YOU SPEAK IT?! "OH DID I BREAK YOUR CONCENTRATION?!"

Originally Posted by cammed goat

You've been watching "The Boondocks" I see.

Hmmm, Im willing to bet my buddy stanger is talking about th good ole movie...

Pulp Fiction

**wheeliE-maxx** · 10-05-2009, 07:37 PM

Man, i'm the worst person to have a daughter. I would have the high school scared of going near her. But with my luck i'd end up like my uncle (mom's brother) with three daughters. He was a player but ended up with three girls. At first he HAD to think "this sucks", but he's cool about it. Kind of like my grandma on my dad's side is all of five foot tall and had to deal with four 6'1' + guys, weird how things work out like that.

**cammed goat** · 10-05-2009, 07:38 PM

Originally Posted by Hi-Po

Hmmm, Im willing to bet my buddy stanger is talking about th good ole movie...

Pulp Fiction

I was wondering that movie as well as Samuel L. has been in both "Boondocks" and "Pulp Fiction". Samuel L. has that emphatic voice.

**justinmc978** · 10-05-2009, 07:39 PM

aha what a n00b, i did have a gf whos dad was like this, big redneck hunter type, scared me at first but i began to figure out he was full of it, its momma you have to worry about ya'll

**Smittro** · 10-05-2009, 07:44 PM

There was a comedian once (forget his name) that put the situation real well once. He said, " Son, I'm gonna tell you something"...."I've been to prison, and I'd have no trouble going back there if you harm one little hair on my daughters head..."
I maybe a little off on it but close enough lol!

**tatertot91** · 10-05-2009, 07:53 PM

Pull out like a 30.06 or something of that nature and ask him what he thinks of it. Tell him you clean it regularly just in case

**barnac0** · 10-05-2009, 08:34 PM

Trying to remember the scene from bad boys 2. That was funny as hell. Will Smith asking the boy, " You ever made love to a man?" The boy " No sir." Smith " You want to?" I about died from that scene.