Life Lessons from Subway: Why a 10/10 can't exist.

**86 IROC-Z** · 10-22-2009, 05:29 AM

So, I eat more subway more than anyone alive ('cept maybe that Jarred guy)... and I learn many things from Subway.

Today, as a nice change the girl serving behind the counter was pretty cute. Nothing to write home about but easy 6.5-7.5/10 (no pics). However as soon as she started making that damn sammich, shit got real.

No technique at all, cheese all piled on one side, no sauce on half the thing, forgot to ask about salt and pepper, though pickles were jalapenos, put ranch sauce on before toasting (ewww..... toasted sauce) etc etc etc. Now in an attempt to not discriminate, I had ignored the fact that she was cute an skinny and ordered my sammich.... But reality strikes again.

Skinny women cannot make a goddamn sammich properly.

I eat at 3-4 different Subway's regularly and EVERY GOD DAMN TIME you get a cute chick to flirt with and impress with you massive deadlifting number, she can't make a sammich - but get a big round fatty who probably needs a crowbar to get through the door in the morning, and the sammich is perfect evertime (cheese nicely melted, extra bit of bacon, salad spread evenly, right amount of sauce etc etc etc).

The fact is that skinny women don't ever eat a goddamn sammich and therefore don't know how the fuck to make one that tastes right.

So Subway has, therefore, proven, that a 10/10 cannot exist:

Skinny = Cannot Make Sammich = Not Perfect (cause no sammich).

Fat = Can Make a Sammich = Not Perfect (cause fat).

Just though I would give you all the heads up.

**chiller2484** · 10-22-2009, 05:43 AM

**Mean Green Z28** · 10-22-2009, 05:44 AM

LOL!

The local subway near my work has me down to a science, as soon as I walk in they know exactly what I'm getting and start taking the bread out and making it ... I sometimes throw a curve-ball and order something else and they're all surprised! lol

**third_shift|studios** · 10-22-2009, 06:46 AM

**SiggyZ** · 10-22-2009, 06:46 AM

My gosh, are you really this bored with life?

**86 IROC-Z** · 10-22-2009, 06:48 AM

Originally Posted by SiggyZ

My gosh, are you really this bored with life?

I need a hobby

besides what I do here

not really a hobby though

more of a nuisance

**Smittro** · 10-22-2009, 06:50 AM

I do'nt know which is more funny, the fact that she made an ass sandwich , or the fact that you stood there and watched her make it..lol

**justinmc978** · 10-22-2009, 08:40 AM

damn... life sucks. i eat at freebirds at least once a day, it seems like USUALLY the burrito the hot chicks make is always busted whereas the guys always do it right, you may be on to something

will someone please make a FFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU poster?

**Sassy Cassie** · 10-22-2009, 08:48 AM

You've never been to my kitchen!

**korndawg** · 10-22-2009, 08:51 AM

Originally Posted by Sassy Cassie

You've never been to my kitchen!

Meaning?

**ntimid8r** · 10-22-2009, 08:55 AM

Originally Posted by 86 IROC-Z

So, I eat more subway more than anyone alive ('cept maybe that Jarred guy)... and I learn many things from Subway.

Today, as a nice change the girl serving behind the counter was pretty cute. Nothing to write home about but easy 6.5-7.5/10 (no pics). However as soon as she started making that damn sammich, shit got real.

No technique at all, cheese all piled on one side, no sauce on half the thing, forgot to ask about salt and pepper, though pickles were jalapenos, put ranch sauce on before toasting (ewww..... toasted sauce) etc etc etc. Now in an attempt to not discriminate, I had ignored the fact that she was cute an skinny and ordered my sammich.... But reality strikes again.

Skinny women cannot make a goddamn sammich properly.

I eat at 3-4 different Subway's regularly and EVERY GOD DAMN TIME you get a cute chick to flirt with and impress with you massive deadlifting number, she can't make a sammich - but get a big round fatty who probably needs a crowbar to get through the door in the morning, and the sammich is perfect evertime (cheese nicely melted, extra bit of bacon, salad spread evenly, right amount of sauce etc etc etc).

The fact is that skinny women don't ever eat a goddamn sammich and therefore don't know how the fuck to make one that tastes right.

So Subway has, therefore, proven, that a 10/10 cannot exist:

Skinny = Cannot Make Sammich = Not Perfect (cause no sammich).

Fat = Can Make a Sammich = Not Perfect (cause fat).

Just though I would give you all the heads up.

**justinmc978** · 10-22-2009, 08:56 AM

okay....... i had to do it

**Smittro** · 10-22-2009, 08:57 AM

Originally Posted by ntimid8r

Haha! Confucius say, "man who stand on toilet get high on pot".

**jad628** · 10-22-2009, 08:58 AM

Ha! You should try ordering in a Subway and then realize you recognize the employee as an arrestee. Guess what kind of extra suace you get on that?!

**Smittro** · 10-22-2009, 08:59 AM

Originally Posted by jad628

Ha! You should try ordering in a Subway and then realize you recognize the employee as an arrestee. Guess what kind of extra suace you get on that?!

Sounds like an assult charge...

**0rion** · 10-22-2009, 09:06 AM

how is this news worthy? I guess because you guys are still coming of age this shit is just dawning on you for the first time. Let me ask you this...Would you get a haircut from a cute blind chick? Then why in the hell does it surprise you that a cute skinny chick can't make a sammich as well as a woman with some meat on her bones?

**86 IROC-Z** · 10-22-2009, 09:09 AM

Originally Posted by 0rion

how is this news worthy? I guess because you guys are still coming of age this shit is just dawning on you for the first time. Let me ask you this...Would you get a haircut from a cute blind chick? Then why in the hell does it surprise you that a cute skinny chick can't make a sammich as well as a woman with some meat on her bones?

Well that blind chick wouldn't be able to see a shoddy haircut, nor more importantly, what I look like

**justinmc978** · 10-22-2009, 09:09 AM

...i wouldnt get a haircut from anyone who was blind...

**wheeliE-maxx** · 10-22-2009, 09:16 AM

Switch to quiznos,it's always good. Way worse for you though

**jad628** · 10-22-2009, 09:17 AM

Originally Posted by Smittro

Sounds like an assult charge...

It's amazing what happens in some places. We had an "incident" in this area a few years ago where a woman got a breakfast biscuit with....you guessed it...semen.

The POS who did it got his company sued big time and she was put in the embarrassing situation of having to explain how she knew what it was (she had actually taken a bite).

Sometimes, there just ain't enough ass-whippin's in this world to make things right.

I apologize for the high-jack. Now back on subject; sounds like our Subway fan just needs to find the right skinny girl to make his sammich! Some of them are superlative!