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Thread: I love my mom
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07-30-2007, 09:06 PM #1
I love my mom
So tonight I get off work, and start drinking some beers.
After about 7 or so, and chatting on live chat, and the train, and some girl thread, I went to get my last beer for the night. When I went down stairs I discovered something horrible.
One of my dogs squirted diarrhea everywhere. Two huge damn dumps. Really big. Really really big.
We had a huge party last saturday night, pig roast and all. My drunk ass brother hit the garbage can which held all the pig guts, pig head, etc, and he kept on driving threw the field/ back yard. So, needless to say there were pig guts everywhere. Dogs gottem.
This morning one of them shit all over his room. serves him right. Bastard. Still my mother cleaned it up. But tonight the other one shit EVERYWHERE on the hardwood floor. Like I said, I walked downstairs to get my last beer, and I heard him running on the hardwood away from me. I looked at him and he was just trembling with fear, of me. Seriously, he was shaking.
I looked down, and saw the stuff. Instead of letting my mom waking up at 4:30ish am time tomorrow and finding 2 nice big ole surprise's, I cleaned it up my self. I gagged hard core, no joke. Then went to flush the half roll of paper towel down the toilet, and realized the toilet didn't like it. So after I plunged the toilet full of dog shit, and put the paper towel's in a garbage bag I went and sprayed Dawn Direct Foam on the hardwood( shut it, I know it wasn't a good idea.... Im a guy) I scrubbed. The fuggin Damn Direct Foam created a smell almost worse than before, mixing with it. Then it just foamed ( go figure) and it took for ever to get off the floor. I set chairs around ground zero and left a note for my mom, told her to have my step dad clean it better tomorrow.
Amazing I can get covered in burnt 90 weight and not think twice, but some dog poo will make me gag like no other.
I am now drinking my last beer. Good night .
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07-30-2007, 09:16 PM #2
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- Cape Coral, FL
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- 39
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Mystic Teal- 99 Trans Am & 01 CBR 929
haha you will make an awful house wife one day my man!
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07-30-2007, 09:28 PM #3
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- One more and I'm gone....
my mommy is great.....she gave birth to me, what else do you want?
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07-30-2007, 09:33 PM #4
Nothing really, I just don't like dog poo. Especially when it consisted of creme poo.
Thats why I picked it up.... duhhhh....
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07-30-2007, 09:33 PM #5
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07-30-2007, 09:39 PM #6
- Join Date
- Aug 2005
- Location
- Cape Coral, FL
- Age
- 39
- Posts
- 3,100
Mystic Teal- 99 Trans Am & 01 CBR 929
that would definatly be a trade off in your favor.
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07-31-2007, 05:56 AM #7
- Join Date
- Jun 2007
- Location
- Harrisburg, PA
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- 38
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- 1,515
Blackety Black- 35th Anniversary SS
I would rather dive in a pool of burnt 90 weight than have to touch liquid poo. that shit makes me gag too man especially the creamiest of the cream shit. When i was really little i remember running through the house and slipping on some creamy shit. I was in socks too and i lost total traction and fell hard. My mom was laughing at me but at least she cleaned it all up...
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07-31-2007, 06:20 AM #8
At least you did not ignore it and gave a good effort to clean it up.
It seems that all moms have very strong stomachs when it comes to cleaning up the fecal.
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07-31-2007, 06:23 AM #9
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- Jun 2007
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- Harrisburg, PA
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- 38
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Blackety Black- 35th Anniversary SS
That's because they wiped worse shit off of your ass!
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07-31-2007, 06:26 AM #10
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07-31-2007, 12:53 PM #11
- Join Date
- Jun 2007
- Location
- Harrisburg, PA
- Age
- 38
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- 1,515
Blackety Black- 35th Anniversary SS
you must train your dog better.
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07-31-2007, 10:29 PM #12
The damn dog shit AGAIN!!!! This time was on the carpet!!!. goddamnit! When is this madness going to stop?!?!?!?!?!!? I went to brush my teeth AFETR my last beer, and I saw something horrible.
Why? Why me?
He was just sitting at my door, trembling, just like last night. mother effer, I still didnt hit him, he had to shit, badly.... but why? Why me? Please for the love of something greater, make this stop.
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08-01-2007, 12:12 AM #13
put a cork in his ass....j/k
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08-01-2007, 06:56 AM #14
- Join Date
- Jan 2007
- Location
- In the janitors closet
- Posts
- 5,452
- One more and I'm gone....
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