the deception continues......

[0rion]

A while back I wrote about my well intentioned wife buying miracle whip lite thinking I wouldn't notice the difference. Ok, she topped that today.
I'm not what I would consider a bagel eater. I may eat bagels 2-3 times a year but when I do there's a certain butter to philly cream cheese ratio I use. It's important that I get this ratio right because that's how I like 'em and since I don't eat 'em that often I want the damn things to taste right.
Yesterday my wife wanted to know if I would eat any bagels if she bought any and I said "yeah, either everything bagels or plain" because the onion bagels she gets suck. She got plain bagels because she wasn't up for everything bagels, not sure why. They rock.
So today I fix me a bagel for breakfast. Had that thing rockin' too. I like them lightly toasted so they're still a little chewy and then loaded with the proper proportion of butter/philly cream cheese. I ate it and the whole time thought something was off but figured maybe the cream cheese was about done or something. At the time I didn't say anything because she was nice enough to buy this stuff so I didn't want to complain about it.
Tonight we're going out to dinner and I told her I never ate lunch that the only thing I had all day was that bagel. I then followed up with " and it wasn't really even that good, something just wasn't right about it." That's when she laughed and said she put philly cream cheese lite in a regular container thinking I wouldn't notice it. Now that shit right there just ain't right. That's blatant lies and deception. If it were murder it would be premeditated murder because that's a thought out plan. It's not like the philly lite horse shit just accidentally got put in the regular container. It was done intentionally. My mom used to do that shit to my dad growing up. She poured 2% milk into vitamin D containers for years. I have now enacted a new house hold rule. Nothing is to get opened up without my being present at the time of said opening. You can't mess with a man's food. That shit just ain't right.

[SeVeReDiStOrTiOn]

She thinks you're getting fat...take the hint

[Kennedy]

I never eat lite shit. Never. I don't even drink lite beer, unless it's all I got to choose from at a friend's house and I'm broke.

I'd have been pissed at the above said scenario, you don't mess with a man's bagel. Even the ecstasy of an everything bagel could potententially be ruined by low-calorie, low-fat, healthy mayo substitute.

[0rion]

She thinks you're getting fat...take the hint

I'll start putting butter on bacon if she keeps this shit up. I know I'm fat, she knows I'm fat. It's not like I woke up one day and went " OH SHIT!!" This has been a damn near 40 year process. I'd rather die fat and happy than skinny eating horse shit my entire life.

[SeVeReDiStOrTiOn]

[Kennedy]

I'll start putting butter on bacon if she keeps this shit up. I know I'm fat, she knows I'm fat. It's not like I woke up one day and went " OH SHIT!!" This has been a damn near 40 year process. I'd rather die fat and happy than skinny eating horse shit my entire life.

Same here man, I worked hard and earned my extra pounds and I intend to keep them until the day I die. Whoever said you can't flex fat never met Kennedy

[SS02]

A while back I wrote about my well intentioned wife buying miracle whip lite thinking I wouldn't notice the difference. Ok, she topped that today.
I'm not what I would consider a bagel eater. I may eat bagels 2-3 times a year but when I do there's a certain butter to philly cream cheese ratio I use. It's important that I get this ratio right because that's how I like 'em and since I don't eat 'em that often I want the damn things to taste right.
Yesterday my wife wanted to know if I would eat any bagels if she bought any and I said "yeah, either everything bagels or plain" because the onion bagels she gets suck. She got plain bagels because she wasn't up for everything bagels, not sure why. They rock.
So today I fix me a bagel for breakfast. Had that thing rockin' too. I like them lightly toasted so they're still a little chewy and then loaded with the proper proportion of butter/philly cream cheese. I ate it and the whole time thought something was off but figured maybe the cream cheese was about done or something. At the time I didn't say anything because she was nice enough to buy this stuff so I didn't want to complain about it.
Tonight we're going out to dinner and I told her I never ate lunch that the only thing I had all day was that bagel. I then followed up with " and it wasn't really even that good, something just wasn't right about it." That's when she laughed and said she put philly cream cheese lite in a regular container thinking I wouldn't notice it. Now that shit right there just ain't right. That's blatant lies and deception. If it were murder it would be premeditated murder because that's a thought out plan. It's not like the philly lite horse shit just accidentally got put in the regular container. It was done intentionally. My mom used to do that shit to my dad growing up. She poured 2% milk into vitamin D containers for years. I have now enacted a new house hold rule. Nothing is to get opened up without my being present at the time of said opening. You can't mess with a man's food. That shit just ain't right.

Sounds Super Valid.... very true to me!!!!
Yet what do I know? I was banned from Live Chat last night, from being the nice GUY!!!???

Well it is my point of veiw, yet... what I know? Bias site...!!!!!!!!!!!!

[0rion]

I mean come on....... I BBQ as a hobby. There's no body building or thong modeling in my future but I'd make a helluva a beer commercial dude.

[Kennedy]

I model for "before" pictures as side income. It's a living.

[0rion]

if Richard Simmons saw me he'd cry and hold my hand.

Name that song.

[Kennedy]

Sounds Super Valid.... very true to me!!!!
Yet what do I know? I was banned from Live Chat last night, from being the nice GUY!!!???

Well it is my point of veiw, yet... what I know? Bias site...!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's "Live Chat", SS2002533HP?

[1MileCrash]

hahahahaha...that's frickin hilarious...your wife is devious as shit...that's good stuff.

[95camaroZNC]

Say something to her and ask her why shes doing it, if shes doing it just to fuck with you laugh about it and move on. If shes mad about your weight talk it out.

[KahanaReef]

Say something to her and ask her why shes doing it, if shes doing it just to fuck with you laugh about it and move on. If shes mad about your weight talk it out.

Hmm, my guess is that she loves him and just wants to make sure he's eating healthy.

And..... since he has an obvious problem with Miracle Whip Lite she has to be creative to help keep him healthy and around for a while

But, like I said... Just a guess

[95camaroZNC]

Hmm, my guess is that she loves him and just wants to make sure he's eating healthy.

And..... since he has an obvious problem with Miracle Whip Lite she has to be creative to help keep him healthy and around for a while

But, like I said... Just a guess

I figured but i was doing that whole benefit of a doubt deal just incase.

[SS02]

What's "Live Chat", SS2002533HP?

Good Point!

[0rion]

Say something to her and ask her why shes doing it, if shes doing it just to fuck with you laugh about it and move on. If shes mad about your weight talk it out.

you'd have to know my wife. We have a great relationship. There's nothing to talk about. She's doing it to keep me around longer. What she doesn't understand is I might not necessarily want to be around that long. I mean the first couple years of your life you're nekkid half the time, no teeth, and shitting all over yourself with food running down your chin. The last couple of years you're doing the same. I'm cool with skipping those last couple of years if it means I get to eat regular miracle whip and philly cream cheese.

[Kennedy]

Good Point!

I wouldn't last two seconds in a chat room, my mind is way too slow. Keeping up with message boards takes enough brainpower...

[67CamaroRSSS]

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^^^^^^

Black (on my screen) task bar at the top....

[Kennedy]

Oh, now I see it. First time I ever noticed it, too...