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  1. #1
    Senior Member FuxOnTheFirstDate's Avatar
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    Shit

    Dead Friend's Birthday

    My recently deceased friend's birthday would have been Friday, June 1st, and I would like to get something to put on his grave. However, I don't know what to do to honor his memory. Have you guys ever lost a friend and then wanted to put something on his or her grave on their birthday? I don't know if this is even the right thing to do or not but I would like to do something. Any ideas?

  2. #2
    Impounded 86 IROC-Z's Avatar
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    Flowers?

  3. #3
    Paid 2 Post Daycrew SexOnWheels's Avatar
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    Anything that makes you think of him. CD, brand of booze, etc.

  4. #4
    Senior Member FuxOnTheFirstDate's Avatar
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    I was thinking flowers but the whole male/male thing makes me think otherwise. I also don't want to do anything that might offend his parents. He liked "Hot Damn" but if I put a flask of it on there his parents might not like it. I don't know, maybe I should get some flowers. If he was a girl I wouldn't have a problem with getting flowers but I'm not sure what to do since we're both guys.

  5. #5
    10 year lurker DrMilhouse's Avatar
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    His parents aren't likely to be offended. His parents were kids at one time. They'll be happy to know that their son left an impression on his friends while he was here. The flower thing, not really gay, you're remembering a friend. Perhaps a donation in his honor to something that he liked would be good. If someone wants to share a little of me with the rest of the world when I die, I would rather them buy dinner for a stranger or give a hug to someone who needs it or make a donation to an animal shelter. Who knows.

    As for your friend, give a gift or just remember him in the way he would want to be remembered. Don't worry about his parents too much, they'll understand your grief and that your way is different than their way.

  6. #6
    10 year lurker DrMilhouse's Avatar
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    Oh yeah... sorry to hear of your friend. It sucks losing a friend. We're supposed to be way too young for this stuff.

  7. #7
    Grand Imperial Wizard Sarge's Avatar
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    Write him a letter. Put it in an envelope and put it on his grave.

  8. #8
    Senior Member ss~zoso~ss's Avatar
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    ^ i like that idea

  9. #9
    Love buying generic GM's Nastyfoot's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FuxOnTheFirstDate View Post
    I was thinking flowers but the whole male/male thing makes me think otherwise. I also don't want to do anything that might offend his parents. He liked "Hot Damn" but if I put a flask of it on there his parents might not like it. I don't know, maybe I should get some flowers. If he was a girl I wouldn't have a problem with getting flowers but I'm not sure what to do since we're both guys.
    He's gone man, male to male is small potatos compared to that. Flowers would be respctful to the family and a class move on your part.


    BTW, sorry for your loss

  10. #10
    Member tnthub's Avatar
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    My Dad passed in 1982 and one of his old buddies would put a business card there every year.

    My Mom passed in 2005 and her former cleaning lady left her a Mother's Day card. It really choked me up...

    I plant flowers every year at their grave.

    My brother is Jewish and he said it is a tradition to leave a stone on top of a grave. Ever since my Mom passed the top has been covered with stones.
    2002 Street ET Champion New England Dragway
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  11. #11
    HERE WE GO STEELERS!!! michaelinchains's Avatar
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    memorial tattoos are a great way to forever honor a loved one

  12. #12
    Veteran 0rion's Avatar
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    there is nothing wrong with putting flowers on his grave. I would even get a shepherds rod and get a hanging basket and put out there. I had a good friend of mine commit suicide many years ago. He was 21 at the time. We used to hunt and fish together. There's not a single hunting season that goes by without me thinking about him.

  13. #13
    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ATCharming's Avatar
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    were u and him real close? what did u 2 do together mostly?

    jw (not tryin to get too personal, just gettin ideas of what to do)

  14. #14
    Yo Da Lin The Valley..... astyles's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sarge View Post
    Write him a letter. Put it in an envelope and put it on his grave.
    thats what i do on my brothers grave........

  15. #15
    Grand Imperial Wizard Sarge's Avatar
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    FOTFD you got your butt banned again? Sheesh son!

  16. #16
    Yeah, That's right CaptainCaveMan's Avatar
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    I don't think i would ever leave anything at a grave. Graveyards are just fancy landfills. Your buddy's body might be there but he isn't. He lives within you now. Go to the bar and buy a round in his name, give money to charity, put one of those memorial stickers on your car, or something like that. If you guys like drag racing, go to the drag strip. If you guys liked fishing, go fishing, if you guys liked the titty-bars go visit one.

  17. #17
    Grand Imperial Wizard Sarge's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CaptainCaveMan View Post
    I don't think i would ever leave anything at a grave. Graveyards are just fancy landfills. Your buddy's body might be there but he isn't. He lives within you now. Go to the bar and buy a round in his name, give money to charity, put one of those memorial stickers on your car, or something like that. If you guys like drag racing, go to the drag strip. If you guys liked fishing, go fishing, if you guys liked the titty-bars go visit one.
    So when I die you guys all go change your oil.

  18. #18
    Member tnthub's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CaptainCaveMan View Post
    I don't think i would ever leave anything at a grave.
    You are correct, but often families visit graves and finding something every once in awhile can really brighten their day.
    Somebody once left a picture of my Mom's cat in a plastic bag by her grave. My mom and her cat had been together for over 15 years and I am guessing it was the person who we gave the cat to after my mom passed.

    Little things like this just remind me that my Mom touched many people in this world.

  19. #19
    Paid 2 Post Daycrew SexOnWheels's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sarge View Post
    FOTFD you got your butt banned again? Sheesh son!
    Geezus it is at least once a week for the bad boy crew????

  20. #20
    Junior Member it was sideways's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CaptainCaveMan View Post
    I don't think i would ever leave anything at a grave. Graveyards are just fancy landfills. Your buddy's body might be there but he isn't. He lives within you now. Go to the bar and buy a round in his name, give money to charity, put one of those memorial stickers on your car, or something like that. If you guys like drag racing, go to the drag strip. If you guys liked fishing, go fishing, if you guys liked the titty-bars go visit one.

    This is how I see it.

    On the anniversary of my mates death I visit the grave then go out to the accident site and drink a few of his favourite beers.

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