Dating advice please

BOOSTD · 04-18-2006, 05:57 PM

Well, as some of you may rmember from my post a while ago, I've been interested in an asian girl for a few months now. Since I first met her, we've gone to lunch / dinner many times, studied together and even played pool a few times. She's asked me to ride with her when she has to go take her bro back to school (3 hours total drive time) so that she has someone to talk to. She also talks to me if she has a problem with a friend or is worried about something. I would say that we've definatly become friends but unfortunatly, we havent realy gone on an official "date" yet. The problem that I am faced with is how to make the transition from just friends to possibly dating? A second problem is that if I were to take her on an official date, we wouldnt really be doing anything different than we normally do (i.e. dinner and a movie / playing pool / hanging out and talking / etc. ). How do I indicate to her that I'm interested in being more than friends without making a fool of myself?

She's a very athletic person, so I was thinking about asking her to go hiking and have a picknick or something. That would be something different than what we have done before and would lend itself to a "dating" athmosphere. Are there other/better date ideas?

Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I am definatly a novice when it comes to dating.

Thanks,
BOOSTD

BIGRED Z · 04-18-2006, 06:04 PM

Since you've been hanging out and she's still hanging around you, chances are she's just waiting for you to make the first move.

Plan that hike, set up for a picnic, pop out a bottle of wine or in your underage case, sparkling cider and some other finger foods like grapes, strawberries, cheese, crackers, etc and go romantic on her. Cuddle up, feed her a strawberry or two, go for that first kiss and see what she does.

Good luck.

Lori

**shadegray** · 04-19-2006, 01:18 AM

I'll give it to you straightforward. Asian chicks like being friends with white dudes, it may or may not mean anything. You known her just a couple months, or known her a long time and just been interested for a couple months? What kind of girl is she, american born or raised, or just came from overseas?

If you've known her a long time and never made a move, you pretty much shot yourself in the foot already. You'd be one of her girlfriends. Especially if you're an effeminate kind of guy, into gossip and fashion and all. Hey, when she tells you about her friends and stuff, you don't go gossiping about it with her, right?

If you've just know her a couple months, you can still save yourself, but she's got an image of you of some sort. Did you show interest when you met her? She ever shown interest in you? Usually when you first meet a chick, even with the purest platonic intentions, she passes some instant subconscious or conscious judgement about whether or not you're the kind of guy she could see herself with. Grow a set. Don't worry about looking stupid, every man has to do it, and there's no shame. With most girls, just ask them out. Be confident, be a man. Asian girls, I usually take it slower. They have to know you a little bit, but not enough to fall into the just friends area. If I'm taking an asian girl seriously for a relationship, I'll ask her out within 1-2 weeks, or the 3rd or so time I see her, whichever comes up sooner. Start complimenting her a lot, tell her she's cute when she does something you like. Usually, these things come across even when you're not really trying. Just let it happen, and don't be embarassed. Gauge her reaction, and decide to whether or not to keep trying from there.
BTW, pics?

Heh, if all else fails and especially if she's a recent immigrant, display some social status or power. There's a few amazing ones, but 80-90% of our girls are whory in their extreme shallowness. But they're usually pretty loyal, and have a soft spoken, cutish personality that masks it until you're broke or outcast. You can be the ugliest, most unpersonable guy in the world, and still get asian girls if you have money, status, or power.

Maybe I'll get some good karma off this, and pull some extra hot white girls this weekend.

**SS#1531** · 04-19-2006, 01:40 AM

Does she talk about dating other guys with you? This could indicate that she just wants to be friends with you. Or if she jokes about dating you, she may be waiting for you to make the first move. Best thing is to be straight forward and tell her how you feel. Get it off your chest; you'll feel better about it regardless of the outcome. Do it fast though, cause the longer you wait, the harder it will be for her to see you as anything but a friend.

BIGRED Z · 04-19-2006, 02:37 AM

Originally Posted by shadegray

Heh, if all else fails and especially if she's a recent immigrant, display some social status or power. There's a few amazing ones, but 80-90% of our girls are whory in their extreme shallowness. But they're usually pretty loyal, and have a soft spoken, cutish personality that masks it until you're broke or outcast. You can be the ugliest, most unpersonable guy in the world, and still get asian girls if you have money, status, or power.

Maybe I'll get some good karma off this, and pull some extra hot white girls this weekend.

By your description, the asian girls aren't shallow whores like American women, just gold diggers who will overlook uglyness if ya got cash or power. I'm not seeing a positive side here.

**Element187** · 04-19-2006, 10:56 AM

sounds like she put you into the friends category. Otherwise she would have been flirting with you heavy to get your attention.

It's really hard to get out of the friends category.

**Spaz** · 04-19-2006, 11:02 AM

the hiking idea is great... don't forget to pack some jesus juice incase she gets thirsty...

**shadegray** · 04-19-2006, 02:10 PM

Originally Posted by BIGRED Z

By your description, the asian girls aren't shallow whores like American women, just gold diggers who will overlook uglyness if ya got cash or power. I'm not seeing a positive side here.

No, all that was in reference to asian girls, didn't mention american girls at all. I think asian girls are shallow, but unlikely to cheat, and often have soft, cute personalities. I think american girls, they're much deeper than the asians, and are fun to be around. Recently immigrated asians come from an extrinsic culture where what other people think of your boyfriend is equally, if not more, important then what they themselves think.

BIGRED Z · 04-19-2006, 05:20 PM

Originally Posted by shadegray

No, all that was in reference to asian girls, didn't mention american girls at all. I think asian girls are shallow, but unlikely to cheat, and often have soft, cute personalities. I think american girls, they're much deeper than the asians, and are fun to be around. Recently immigrated asians come from an extrinsic culture where what other people think of your boyfriend is equally, if not more, important then what they themselves think.

Ok, thanks for the clarification.

**jimbo98z** · 04-19-2006, 06:25 PM

Originally Posted by SS#1531

Does she talk about dating other guys with you? This could indicate that she just wants to be friends with you. Or if she jokes about dating you, she may be waiting for you to make the first move. Best thing is to be straight forward and tell her how you feel. Get it off your chest; you'll feel better about it regardless of the outcome. Do it fast though, cause the longer you wait, the harder it will be for her to see you as anything but a friend.

That could not be more true. Trust me...

**Sassy Cassie** · 04-19-2006, 06:44 PM

**jimbo98z** · 04-19-2006, 07:04 PM

^^^^

That's some funny shit! True too.

The Rookie · 04-19-2006, 07:37 PM

Just make a move. See how she reacts, then you will know. Or just tell her you are interested. Be open and honest

BOOSTD · 04-19-2006, 08:15 PM

sounds like I'm kinda SOL on this one, ehh? Should I just come out and say "hey, I like you" or should I be more subtle. I think your right though. I can see the "friend" stamp on my head. Now the problem is getting rid of it.

Great game too!! haha

badass67 · 04-19-2006, 09:16 PM

Originally Posted by BIGRED Z

Since you've been hanging out and she's still hanging around you, chances are she's just waiting for you to make the first move.

Plan that hike, set up for a picnic, pop out a bottle of wine or in your underage case, sparkling cider and some other finger foods like grapes, strawberries, cheese, crackers, etc and go romantic on her. Cuddle up, feed her a strawberry or two, go for that first kiss and see what she does.

Good luck.

Lori

Yup, perfect idea! Do not forget the rubbers.

Talk to her, tell her how you feel. Maybe she is the feelig same way.

**bandit95** · 04-21-2006, 08:15 AM

put your dick in her and if she likes it then it's all good. if she dont, then lawyer up.
in all seriousness, if you think it's worth goin for then tell her how you feel. you only live once.

**TMF** · 04-21-2006, 10:43 AM

I think she's waiting for you to kick it up to the next level.

**tnthub** · 04-21-2006, 11:37 AM

Just hang out, rent a flic, get some popcorn and chopsticks, and talk to her and see how she feels.

I think that you are probably just shy and worried she will say "no". Well the only way to find out is to ask her and you can do that by actuially asking or just maybe touching her arm while hanging out, giving her a hug, giver her a few good loks. She will get the message.

The worst thing that can happen is she will say "no' and that will confirm that you are in the "friend zone" and then at least you know where you stand. As of now you do not know where you stand. Uncertaintly breeds fantasy. She is a legend in your own mind. Just man up and let her know how you feel. You will feel better regadless of her response.