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  1. #1
    Senior Member Z28Thunder's Avatar
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    Arctic White
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    Banned from Wal Mart

    I hope this is not a repost.


    This is why Bo is still working!





    I know this has gone around before but it is hillarious – who couldn’t use a good laugh right now!!


    Be very careful around bored husbands, their creative juices start
    to overflow!!!

    After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips
    to Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring
    and preferred to get in and get out. Equally, unfortunately, my wife
    is like most women ---she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife
    received the following letter from Wal-Mart.


    Dear Mrs. Hill,

    Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a
    commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have
    been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints
    against Mr.Hill are listed below and are documented by our video
    surveillance cameras.

    1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them
    in people' s carts when they weren't looking.

    2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at
    5-minute intervals.

    3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to
    the women's restroom.

    4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official
    voice, 'Code 3 in House wares. Get on it right away'.

    5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of
    M&M's on layaway.

    6. August 14: Moved the 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a
    carpeted area.

    7.. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told
    other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows
    and blankets from the bedding department.

    8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he
    began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave
    me alone?'

    9. September 4th: Looked right into the security camera and
    used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

    10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting
    department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants
    were.


    11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly
    humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.

    12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna
    Look' by using different sizes of funnels.

    13. October 18: He hid in a clothing rack and when people
    browsed by, he yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

    14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud
    speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO!
    IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'


    and last, but not least. . . .


    15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
    awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper
    in here!!

  2. #2
    El Toro Grande jaslivers's Avatar
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    1958 chevy pickup 283
    02 gmc z71 5.3L white

    haha thats the greatest thing i have read on here of all time!!!

  3. #3
    Member c5z28's Avatar
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    On your ass flashing
    my highbeams

    AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!



  4. #4
    Sold: LS1 '85 El Camino ls1camino's Avatar
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    hahaha...fucking awesome!!!

  5. #5
    Another day Another 5th ARM5280's Avatar
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    I've done the fitting room toilet paper one. Fiancee didn't think it was that funny, although everyone else did

  6. #6
    Impounded 86 IROC-Z's Avatar
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    Just a fancy abridged version of the "How to fuck with Wal-Mart" guide. Funny nevertheless.

  7. #7
    Junior Member FirebirdFever's Avatar
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    This was originally a list of "Things to do in wal-mart" dating back from like...1997..

  8. #8
    Impounded 86 IROC-Z's Avatar
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    Everything fiberglass
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    Quote Originally Posted by FirebirdFever View Post
    This was originally a list of "Things to do in wal-mart" dating back from like...1997..



    Probably older than the internets

  9. #9
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    Pewter Metallic
    2002 Trans Am WS6 M6 D1SC


  10. #10
    F-Body Genius Another WS6 Guy's Avatar
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    01 ECSB Z71 & 89 Iroc-Z

    ^^

  11. #11
    Senior Member Z28Thunder's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 86 IROC-Z View Post



    Probably older than the internets
    Aye probably true since the net did start until 1993. Heck you were what 4 then???

  12. #12
    Impounded 86 IROC-Z's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Z28Thunder View Post
    Aye probably true since the net did start until 1993. Heck you were what 4 then???
    I was 5!














    Assuming it was created after October

  13. #13
    Senior Member Z28Thunder's Avatar
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    Arctic White
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    Quote Originally Posted by 86 IROC-Z View Post
    I was 5!














    Assuming it was created after October

    Opps okay 5..

  14. #14
    Just me Y2KPewterSS's Avatar
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    Does this mean 1 particular WM or are all locations included?

  15. #15
    Bone it like you own it FORD RECOVERY EXPERT's Avatar
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    They say you are banned for life if you shop lift, but hell.... Do they watch the camera's 24/7.... like" Look! it's Preston..... Run him outta here!!!!"




  16. #16
    Member state69champ's Avatar
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    im sorry but i think this is retarded... one.. its a huge fucking lie.. no old man is going to do any of this said in the "letter" and two wal-mart would never send a letter to anyone liek this.. how do they know her name, her address and who her husband is.. this is a fail in my book.

  17. #17
    Bone it like you own it FORD RECOVERY EXPERT's Avatar
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    <-----Worked at WalMart....


    <-----Did over half the shit on the list....


    <-----Never got banned.....

  18. #18
    Sold: LS1 '85 El Camino ls1camino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by state69champ View Post
    im sorry but i think this is retarded... one.. its a huge fucking lie.. no old man is going to do any of this said in the "letter" and two wal-mart would never send a letter to anyone liek this.. how do they know her name, her address and who her husband is.. this is a fail in my book.
    Clearly you don't know Sarge.


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