While waiting in line

[c5z28]

I was in line at the DQ on 6th getting mother's usual order of 3 hot dogs and onion rings. I was looking down at my Gameboy, not paying attention to the line when I felt the warm breeze hit my legs. I looked up from my Pokemon battle and there you were. 5'2, about 315 lbs. You had the remnants of your first two DQ orders stuck in your teeth, which were so gnarled, I could see them from the back.

You were polishing off a Dilly Bar when the methane cloud rose to my nostrils, curling my nose hairs. It was an aroma that could only be produced by a goddess. As I felched it, I detected a hit of salmon as well as delicate notes of chili. Subtle overtones of movie theater style butter pop corn were soon overpowered by the second wave, which brought a strong scent and taste of corned beef and cabbage. (Mmmmmmm...)

I could see the gas bubble trying to escape from your neoprene-esque tights, most of which were so far up your crack, I debated momentarily whether they were actually two pairs of pants, each housing one of your delightful cankles. The outline of your swollen, probably irritated pachyderm knuckle made me picture a furry cantaloupe split perfectly down the middle, complete with crateresque dimples. This image only further infuriated my raging erection. I struggled to contain my three inches until I eventually prematurely ejaculated. It might have been embarrassing had I not been wearing pajamas with the feet in them under my value brand khakis.

I know you will probably never read this, as I heard you commenting to the store clerk that you could not read, and proceeded to order by pointing at pictures and grunting. But I had to share my story.

I hope to see you again some day. And if by some chance someone reads this to you, please do not shave, I really liked your mustache.

[Mr. Luos]

Checking the missed connections on craigslist I see.

[c5z28]

best of craigslist some real winners in there.

[00LS12LS6Z28]

Damn I was hoping you meant to say 5'2" 115 pounds. But as I continued reading and throwing up in my mouth I figured it was not a mistype.

[Y2KPewterSS]

inb4 all the inb4s

[00LS12LS6Z28]

I heard they were going to put DQ's in Walmarts....What a deadly combination especially when you visit the people of Walmart site.

[Mr. Luos]

I heard they were going to put DQ's in Walmarts....What a deadly combination especially when you visit the people of Walmart site.

This will be great for unintentional comedy.

Wal-Mart already ranks right up there.

[Zapper2003]

First of the month is the best time to go to Wallyworld to peoplewatch.

[c5z28]

Damn I was hoping you meant to say 5'2" 115 pounds. But as I continued reading and throwing up in my mouth I figured it was not a mistype.

"The outline of your swollen, probably irritated pachyderm knuckle made me picture a furry cantaloupe split perfectly down the middle"

[Zapper2003]

[wheeliE-maxx]

Alot of Wal-marts i've been to (like the one closest to my house) have McDonalds which is always good if you want to laugh at a 180 pound five year old illegal kid. I like Dairy Queen though, would be nice if Wally world had one as the DQ in my town sucks balls