Was I in the wrong? wat do you think

**Blackout99** · 08-30-2008, 08:06 AM

so i was just talkin to my GF on the phone n she left for college like 2 weeks ago, 3 hours away, n somehow she asked me about when i told her i wouldnt date a fat chick, n she was like "wat if i put on a few pounds at college, does that mean u'd break up with me?" n i was like " that depends on wat u mean by a few pounds", n made a comparison to this girl in our high skool that got real fat in a year n i was like, "in that case, yea i would break up with u" she immediatly got pissed n called me shallow n said she had to go......

i dunno bout you but i lift n play football, n i like my girl to stay healthy to i, i dunno if i could deal with someone who would just let themself go like that, so am i in the wrong here?

PS: we've been dating for a little over a year

**Kennedy** · 08-30-2008, 08:10 AM

Originally Posted by Blackout99

so i was just talkin to my GF on the phone n she left for college like 2 weeks ago, 3 hours away, n somehow she asked me about when i told her i wouldnt date a fat chick, n she was like "wat if i put on a few pounds at college, does that mean u'd break up with me?" n i was like " that depends on wat u mean by a few pounds", n made a comparison to this girl in our high skool that got real fat in a year n i was like, "in that case, yea i would break up with u" she immediatly got pissed n called me shallow n said she had to go......

i dunno bout you but i lift n play football, n i like my girl to stay healthy to i, i dunno if i could deal with someone who would just let themself go like that, so am i in the wrong here?

Yes.

Start looking for a new GF. Try the local health club.

**Spaz** · 08-30-2008, 08:18 AM

Originally Posted by Kennedy

Yes.

Start looking for a new GF. Try the local health club.

+1...

if you don't love her now for who she is and you're more worried about physical appearance then break up with her now and spare her the bull shit acting...

**Blackout99** · 08-30-2008, 08:24 AM

I do love her tho, but if she would get to the point that the girl i made reference to did, i just dunno, i dont c how someone could just let themselves go like that
she likes fit guys, n i dunno if she'd stay with me if i all the sudden stopped working out n gained a ton of weight, right now im sure she'd say she wouldnt care cuz she's mad about wat i said, but i think on the inside she'd feel the same thing

**Kennedy** · 08-30-2008, 08:29 AM

Originally Posted by Blackout99

I do love her tho, but if she would get to the point that the girl i made reference to did, i just dunno, i dont c how someone could just let themselves go like that
she likes fit guys, n i dunno if she'd stay with me if i all the sudden stopped working out n gained a ton of weight, right now im sure she'd say she wouldnt care cuz she's mad about wat i said, but i think on the inside she wouldnt like me as much

Physical attraction is a part of a successful relationship, but if that is considered a deal-breaker by either or both of those involved, it ain't "love". It's more like "lusty friendship", which honestly at 18 years old would be a lot more enjoyable to you than trying to maintain a long-distance relationship that is already a bit tenuous.

**bodyman5000** · 08-30-2008, 08:35 AM

If you haven't learned this already, here ya go.

LIE!

If you say you would stay with her if she got fat, the only way she will know you lied to her is if she ACTUALLY GETS FAT.

Then you can dump her and say

Sorry, I lied. Later.

**Spaz** · 08-30-2008, 08:36 AM

Originally Posted by Kennedy

Physical attraction is a part of a successful relationship, but if that is considered a deal-breaker by either or both of those involved, it ain't "love". It's more like "lusty friendship", which honestly at 18 years old would be a lot more enjoyable to you than trying to maintain a long-distance relationship that is already a bit tenuous.

correct...

weight can be lost in many ways... maybe there are things about you that she doesn't like that she over looks for the sake of being wwith you because she loves who you are... you should take a look at your self and realise that you are not perfect by any means and think about what you want and need to do...

**Kennedy** · 08-30-2008, 08:42 AM

Warning! Free Advice coming...

Appearance plays a definite role, but if you're in it for the long haul eventually we all age. Find someone you really like spending time with.

Oh yeah, and make sure she's great in bed.

**TempleU_WS6** · 08-30-2008, 09:01 AM

Originally Posted by Kennedy

Physical attraction is a part of a successful relationship, but if that is considered a deal-breaker by either or both of those involved, it ain't "love". It's more like "lusty friendship", which honestly at 18 years old would be a lot more enjoyable to you than trying to maintain a long-distance relationship that is already a bit tenuous.

Agreed.

**Eugenio_SS** · 08-30-2008, 09:05 AM

should have asked her if she started gaining weight...

**TransAm11973** · 08-30-2008, 10:43 AM

were talking about a college girl here not a 60 yr old women , if she is packing on the pounds its for a reason....of course a few lbs isnt a problem, i guess, but if she becomes a total slob then thats another story,.....its a chosen lifestyle.......ones chooses to be a slob,........... so your not married,....and YOU dont HAVE to choose to be with a slob......and on the other side even if you were married.....it would still be an issue . i know if my wife started packing on the lbs i would say something and vice versa....no one wants to be with a person who chooses to be a fat ass..its one thing if its a medical problem.....another is your just a fat ass.........its gross and there are many many peope in this country like that

**InEEdSPEED** · 08-30-2008, 10:50 AM

You were defiently right about telling her to keep herself in good shape. Id rather be shallow then with a fat chick.

2c

BadBlueBird* · 08-30-2008, 11:18 AM

No doubt she is cheating on you as you were typing that.

**juiced99ws6** · 08-30-2008, 01:48 PM

see you think now that you would leave her and I probrably would have said the same thing if I were in your shoes and it hadnt happened yet however I was engaged before and the girl I was with was slowly gaining weight the entire time I was with her and it didnt bother me because I cared for her a whole lot so I ddint even really notice. After we broke up and I pretty much wanted to kill her whenever I saw her I definatly noticed that she had gotten fat and it kinda repulsed me a bit lol.

anyways moral of the story, just lie and see what you think about it if it happens. Hell if you go visit her and she is putting on a few pounds just get her a membership to a gym or something bu make i seem like her idea. After that she has no excuses

**THE MANIAC** · 08-30-2008, 01:54 PM

Originally Posted by Eugenio_SS

should have asked her if she started gaining weight...

+1
healthy and skinny is my style

**bodyman5000** · 08-30-2008, 03:17 PM

My girlfriend is a bit over her ideal weight but looks great and is healthy. However, we were at a store today and this gigantic chick was waddling in the store in front of her. My girl told me "shoot me if I ever get that big"

I told her I would "shoot her an email from my grandmother's house"

Meaning I would leave her of course, which I wouldn't but it was pretty funny.

**Blackout99** · 08-30-2008, 07:35 PM

Originally Posted by TransAm11973

were talking about a college girl here not a 60 yr old women , if she is packing on the pounds its for a reason....of course a few lbs isnt a problem, i guess, but if she becomes a total slob then thats another story,.....its a chosen lifestyle.......ones chooses to be a slob,........... so your not married,....and YOU dont HAVE to choose to be with a slob......and on the other side even if you were married.....it would still be an issue . i know if my wife started packing on the lbs i would say something and vice versa....no one wants to be with a person who chooses to be a fat ass..its one thing if its a medical problem.....another is your just a fat ass.........its gross and there are many many peope in this country like that

THANK YOU, thats exactly wat im sayin, its a choice someone makes to eat like shit n not do anything active, n i lift 5-6 days a week out of season, n now i have football almost everyday so i actually do stuf, n if i didnt play football i could never let myself go to waste like that, n i wouldnt want to date someone who would do that

**Blackout99** · 08-30-2008, 07:36 PM

Originally Posted by Spaz

correct...

weight can be lost in many ways... maybe there are things about you that she doesn't like that she over looks for the sake of being wwith you because she loves who you are... you should take a look at your self and realise that you are not perfect by any means and think about what you want and need to do...

im sure she doesnt like somethings about me, and i overlook and make sacrifices because i love her too

**B34M3R** · 08-30-2008, 09:21 PM

meh, you dont need to defend yourself to the relationship nazis. if my GIRLFRIEND(you know, as in not wife) put on 50lbs in between times I saw her... well, I might not dump her then, but if she didn't try to work on it, then yea, I would. Theres "overweight" and then theres just plain fat...